I am a freshman in college and will be heading into my second semester in a few weeks. I have a friend who will be taking a class next semester that I took the previous semester. Since the professor of that class is fairly new, the class I was in last semester was the first time that the professor taught the class at our school. I did really well and ultimately got an A in the class. I don’t know if this will happen, but I’m worried that my friend may ask me for help on the assignments and I don’t feel that it is my responsibility to help her with the work for that class. I’d be more than happy to discuss how she feels about the class, but I don’t think I should help her with the work because I feel like it would be my work rather than hers. How can I tell her this in a kind way without hurting her feelings?
Maybe you can give her a heads up on what to expect, you don’t need to help her if you don’t want too. I don’t think she will be offended, tell her you are busy with your academics. But honestly, a little help won’t hurt for as long she won’t be dependent to you.
The line between helping someone and doing the work for them isn’t very hard to draw. Providing help reinforces your own understanding of the material as well.
But to answer your question, if you are unwilling to help just tell her that and explain that you don’t see how to provide help in a way that doesn’t require you doing the work for her.
Why are you even anticipating such problems? Seems like anticipating them is almost courting them. Don’t.
Well, maybe I’m old-fashioned, but for me friends do help each other, within reasonable limits of course, depending on their other commitments. In this case it would be not doing the work for her, but helping her understand the material. Naturally, you’re not under any obligation to help, but then I hope you’re not planning to ask any of your friends for help later on either.
You can give her some advice on what the professor is looking for, but aren’t you going to be too busy to help her with her work and do your own? But I agree with above comment that you are worrying about a problem that likely won’t happen.
Direct her to the tutoring center. Tell her that you have recently read on CC of several students who received punishment for giving fellow students unauthorized assistance which violates the school’s honor code.
Or just quote her an exorbitant fee that you feel certain no one would pay.
This isn’t one extreme of “help her on the assignments” versus the other extreme of doing nothing. You can certainly clarify some particular learning point for a minute without becoming her tutor.
It does sound odd that you anticipate this responsibility and she hasn’t even asked. As if you feel she can’t do the work on her own??
First, see if she asks you questions.
Then, see what kind of questions she asked.
If it is “how did you come up with a topic for the first paper”, then talk to her about your thought process.
If it is “what did you write about” then that is okay.
if it is “can I see your old paper for ideas” or “Can I see your old homeworks” then no, that could cause a plagiarism issue.
If it gets to be too much, you could say “I think you are having more problems with this course that I can help with. Want me to walk with you to the tutoring center to sign you up for a tutor?”
While in med school, doctors will say this is how they learned a procedure: “See one, Do one, Teach one”.
So if your friend asks, then this might be an opportunity for you to teach, and thereby gain an even deeper understanding of the subject.
And “teaching” or “mentoring” is NOT doing it for the person. Don’t risk plagiarism, but don’t be afraid to provide mentor.
OP made clear that he does not want to help her.
Just be unavailable or say “sorry, I’m too busy” if it ever becomes a problem.
I don’t see the point in telling her you won’t help her before she even asks.
I’m not planning on saying anything unless she asks, at which point I will likely take your advice. I always just want to be prepared ahead of time for anything. Thanks for the advice!
I’m sure she can do the work on her own. I just want to be prepared for anything, especially because I’ve heard from several sources that the class is hard and the professor is a tough grader. Personally, I felt the opposite, it was my easiest class, but if so many people are saying those things, clearly it’s not easy for everyone. Also, my friend already asked me if it was an easy class which was a hard question to answer. I believe I said that it’s hard to say because it’s different for everyone and no class is extremely easy. I did work hard, but I think the material just came more naturally to me than it does to some people in part because I already had some knowledge of the material going into the class. I did learn some new things as well, but it was easier to learn them with a solid foundation already in place. My friend is fairly new so I don’t know how much background she has in the subject.
Friends help friends. Good luck.
You’re overthinking this.
If she asks, “sure, I’d be happy to help if you have a quick question, as long as you don’t ask me to do something unethical”.
Wait and see what kind of questions she does ask.
Depending on your program of studies and your circle of friends, you might end up with multiple opportunities to provide help and to ask for help yourself. It is good that you are giving thought to the appropriate limits of that assistance.