I feel like now that I know that there are so many colleges out there, each with its own opportunities and environment to offer, it’s impossible for me to pick just one top dream school (to ED or REA/SCEA to). So for those of you who do have a single dream school, how did you figure that out? And what made you pick that school over other, similar schools?
TBH, it’s better not to have a “dream school.” Identifying a first choice is fine, and applying early to your first choice can be advantageous and wise, but it’s best not to lose the perspective that there is no One Perfect College for you. Select a well-balanced list of schools and find something to love about all of them. If there’s not one clear standout, or if the final ranking will need to depend on costs, then stick with non-binding early action applications and RD.
i agree with aquapt. it’s best to not have a dream school. a first choice is fine, but try not to have a dream school. stanford was my “dream school,” but i got rejected, and it absolutely crushed me. i was devastated for months after; however, i want to point out that this…
…is some of the best advice you can be given. had i not been rejected from stanford, i would have never found grinnell (where i’ll be attending in the fall; where i’ll be just as happy). pick schools that best meet all of your criteria, and make all of them your “dream schools” 
I agree as well. I was so set on the idea of my dream school that I didn’t look into any other schools well enough. I had oriented my entire college experience around one school. Thus, I had 8 of great options, but I only knew some stuff about 4-5. Plus, my dream school rejected me. Fortunately, since I applied to my current school EA, I had time to properly look into it and make an informed decision, and I realized that it was a much better fit. It is perfectly ok and normal to have a dream school, but don’t feel like you have to be dead set on one perfect school. Sure, it can boost your morale to help you focus on school, but it’s often better to assess it all rationally in a well-balanced list form.
We’ve talked a lot this year about “blooming where you’re planted.”
My daughter is thrilled to death to be attending Plymouth State in NH… twitching with excitement kind of happy. That said, a year ago it wasn’t even on her radar. She originally applied to a couple of schools, and by Christmas was NOT happy with her results. The schools that had accepted her simply didn’t look a promising as they had in the fall.
So she had a pity party or two, did more research, and found and applied to Plymouth. We visited in February and she fell in love.
Is it the only school, out of about 3000 in the country, that would make her this happy? Probably not. I think that anyone-- particularly anyone 18 years old-- should be flexible enough that there are any number of schools that can make you that happy.
The trick is finding a list of schools that will make you happy… That way, when the results come in, you have viable options.
She has a classmate who applied to SUNY Cortland and got rejected. And applied to SUNY Oneonta and got deferred. And will be attending community college in the fall. Not by choice, not to save money, not because she’s not “smart enough” to go elsewhere. But because after that Oneonta deferral, she wasn’t flexible enough to sit down, do her homework,and find other schools that could make her happy.
I agree with all the posters above.
I will answer the second part of your question, while echoing their responses to the first part of your question.
Here is a process for picking a college to which to apply early decision.
- Read college guides and start getting a sense of what appeals/ does not appeal to you in a college. Also get a sense of which are “realistic” options for you, in terms of both your academic credentials/ scores and your finances.
- Read the glossy brochures from the colleges as well as their websites. Run the net price calculators if cost is an issue.
- If you can visit some colleges that appeal to you, do it!
- By #3 you probably will have a sense of what you’re looking for in a college, and which schools match it.
- Start comparing features of these colleges. Are there a couple of frontrunners?
- Use sites like College Confidential and its ilk to get a feel for the “soft” factors of each frontrunner— the social milieu, etc.
- Go by “gut” or “feel.” Of the frontrunners, which would you be most sorry to say goodbye to if you went to another?
- Apply to that college ED. Also apply EA at the same time to some safety schools that have similar features. This will ease the blow if you are deferred or rejected from the ED college.
I am a big believer that you do not need a “top” choice to apply ED to a school. You just need a choice that you like AS MUCH as any other choice and that you will have no regrets about attending.
In fact, it is better not to have your heart set on one school, but rather to be attracted to reaches, matches and safeties on your list. Then an ED rejection will be disappointing but not devastating.
Good luck!
It is better NOT to have a dream school! Having a list of schools with varying ranges of selectivity and feeling very confident you’d be happy attending any college on your list is the best position to be in.
You’ve got one ED bullet, but that doesn’t mean you have to use it - there are alternatives. Are you worried about missing out on EA decisions, or do you just want to do ED to get the process over with? If you have any rolling admissions on your list, apply to one of them first (you’ll likely have until May 1 to decide). You can also prioritize the non-binding early action schools on your list. You’ll likely know whether you are accepted/rejected/waitlisted at around the same time as your friends applying ED, but without the commitment.
Will you be touring any colleges in the next few months? You’ve got a good four months until ED applications are due. That’s enough time for one place to shine over the others. If not, no worries!
Any college can be your dream college. Every year, there are students who feel that their lives are over if they don’t get into their top choice. And what happens? Often, the school that was their second choice, their third choice, or ever their safety school becomes their “dream college,” as they cannot imagine themselves anywhere else.
Truth is, students will be fine at any number of schools. Remember too that two-thirds of all college students do not go away to school. They are non-traditional: older, married or in a serious relationship, holding down a job (or two), juggling the demands of school and family. One a third of students go away to school, and only a tiny sliver of this group is worrying about whether they will be accepted at Selective U or Selective C.
I agree that you need many schools that could be the dream. My daughter applied to 8 schools, all of which she could see herself attending. The ones that didn’t make her list (we visited 15) didn’t “feel” right. Some times it was very subjective just about what she perceived the students to be like, other times there were clear academic fit issues. That said, she did have a number one. That school just seemed to have the perfect combination of academics, happy students, facilities, size, location, etc… But again, she says she would have been happy at any of the schools she applied.