I am sure this has been discussed before but it is so broad a question that I really couldn’t find any good results so here goes. Applicant gets into none of top choices (i.e Andover, Choate and SPS), does get into several other schools, a few of which are solidly respectable (i.e Mercersburg, Tabor) and a few they really have little interest anyway (so those are easy to delete and I won’t name them as I don’t want to offend anyone). How do you pick? The one with the lowest acceptance rate? The one that offers the most money? The one that seems the most prestigious of the bunch. Yes I know–most people will say pick the one you like but what if the ones you like are not options? How do you recalibrate? Quickly? Anyone else been is this situation?
My plan is to go to revisit day for all 6 schools first (because I haven’t visited any yet), and get a feel for the atmosphere, see the campus, etc. Then I guess I’ll make some type of spreadsheet about everything I know about all of the schools, and see which one fits me best!
@Center, if not picking the one that gives most money is an option, I would revisit the ones in which there is interest and let the kid decide where he or she feels at home. If the financial situation requires picking the one that gives most money, I would still revisit that school to make sure that the kid feels comfortable there and overall there are no bad vibes or other concerns. So in either case, I would probably revisit the big FA school first, and if the kid loves it, cancel the rest of the revisits and enroll there. Others may choose differently, but as someone who depends on lots of FA, that would be my strategy. I hope this helps. It’s great to have options, even if they don’t seem too exciting at first!
I love spreadsheets (how geeky of me I know 
) and I too would make a sheet of things important to you (size, diversity, student-faculty ratio, # of AP/advanced classes, matriculation, etc) and do columns for all schools…
When comparing that might help choosing between some…
If re-visits are possible, that should be a must as well (but take with a spoon of salt considering all schools have put on their best face)…
I think I would also look at your DC’s interests and see if any of the schools are particularly strong/have special programs/very supportive of those interests…
Good Luck @Center 
We had this situation for college. We revisited everything that was still in the running. Of the ones that were tied at the top of the list after revisits, the one that offered the most money was the one that was chosen. It’s really important to go to the revisit days with an open mind, not with a sense of settling (even if you’re feeling that now.). I know students who have changed their preferences dramatically as a result of revisit days. They’ll experience the school without you for a day, and really, it may be quite different from the first tour/interview trip.
Not directed at the OP, but as a BS alum and former BS parent, here’s what I know : Parents need to get out of the way and let their kid make the final decision. Why? Because parents aren’t the ones going!
BS is a long and arduous uphill hike every. single. day - especially if you’re a capable human being and you’re doing it right ( see full throttle- not slacking ). Most BS students will be tested more outside of the classroom than in - especially in the III and IV Form.
FWIW- Academics are really ramped up during V Form year and that’s when BSs will try to kill your kid.
Students: Put away your spreadsheets and decide where you’ll be the most comfortable… you know- while you’re waist deep in adversity and regret. 
I’m only half kidding.
Go to Revisit Days. CHECK OUT THE VIEW. Tune out the hard sell and try to imagine living there for four years. It’s really that simple - or that difficult depending on what type of person you are. Don’t overthink it… just go where your heart tells you. Pull a K2! Get into all the “Top” schools on CC and choose a “Hidden Gem” - if that’s what your heart is telling you ! FYI- I didn’t waste one dime sending him there and I had two older kids at “Top” schools.
All the other stuff ( academics, sports, outside the classroom/school opportunities ) is basically the same no matter where you go in the Top 30. Have you ever compared all the college matriculation lists for these schools? It doesn’t matter because they’re all the same! Isn’t it liberating to remove that from your plate? I think so! If you’re the parent of an incoming III Former and you’re counting how many kids got into Yale on a BS Matriculation List- we need to talk because you have more important things to think about- like the four years in front of your kid and how you’re going to detach from them so they can get the maximum benefit from this experience.
And… unfortunately for some parents/students, there won’t be a CC BS hierarchy when you get there. All BS parents, students and schools consider each other equals. The ocean doesn’t part for a select few- you know? That’s just untrue and mock-worthy in my book. So prepare yourself if you think otherwise.
Basing your BS choice on prestige is not only folly- it’s a fleeting and meaningless exercise , and it won’t help the kid doing all the heavy lifting day after day, and on weekends, too. Keep that in mind on Revisit Day(s) and let your kid decide which BS to attend.
Thanks- I feel better now.
Hear hear!
Easy. The student got into Mercersburg.
Seriously, I think you got great advice from @goatmama and @PhotographerMom.
Thanks @twinsmama @PhotographerMom @GoatMama @Atria etc. I know the applicant really felt like they would be admitted to at least one of the 3 top schools for several reasons. So while grateful to have excellent options all of sudden the focus is dramatically different. Fortunately they cast a wide net that was focused on specific programs. (not my kid)
Assuming that all the options are within the parent’s financial constraints, of course. 
@skieurope thanks for the comment. Financial is absolutely critical to the decision. So-is a more prestigious school worth greater sacrifice? None of these schools are HADES obviously so the comparison isnt as uniform.
No. It’s not worth it for a prep school, and it is not worth it for a college. At the risk of assuming that anyone is a prestige junkie, a top flight education can be found at a non-HADES school (and at a non-HYPSM college).
^ I am with @skieurope on that one. Not worth it.
- Love the school that loves you (with more $$)
- I'm not sure revisiting 6+ schools would be productive even if the visits are financially feasible. I would cull the revisit list to 3 or 4. Or have some sort of preferences, visit Top 1 (and 2) preferred school. Stop there if there is a winner. Keep going Top 3, 4, etc, if the earlier ones are No No in real visit.
So, @GoatMama and @skieurope, you both believe that a more prestigious school isn’t worth spending more on if there’s another decent school the applicant was accepted to?
Thanks everyone…so the school that offers the most money is your vote? Kid in question will only return to three schools.
@skieurope - How did you that dark shades for quoting someone.
"Not directed at the OP, but as a BS alum and former BS parent, here’s what I know : Parents need to get out of the way and let their kid make the final decision. Why? Because parents aren’t the ones going!
BS is a long and arduous uphill hike every. single. day - especially if you’re a capable human being and you’re doing it right ( see full throttle- not slacking ). Most BS students will be tested more outside of the classroom than in - especially in the III and IV Form."
So true. @PhotographerMom - sorry did not know how to highlight therefore used “” to quote you. Daughter told that we need to give credit to the original author this way
@center you are awesome to start this thread
I’m fairly confident that skieuropei attended/attends two extremely prestigious schools…so his/her advice is very appreciated.
@Center: From your previous posts, I always assumed you already had a kid at a “prestigious” BS? Are you asking for a second kid or a friend?