Hopefully you can get some lacrosse specific advice here. I can’t help there, my advice is more general.
Full disclosure my S is same age, but we are in a part of the country where the schools he is interested in don’t normally recruit, so we wanted to get an early start to get him on their radar. He has been in contact with his targeted programs for a few months, and even took unofficial visits to a few. And I am a bit OCD when it comes to this, so I can give you a bit of what the collective wisdom you will find on this board and other places on the internet will be. Plus I have had some individual conversations with parents of kids in similar situations.
First thing is I would ask a club/high school coach for an honest assessment of what is realistic. If there is a college coach you know well enough to get an honest answer, even better. As a parent, I think there have been times where I was overestimating or underestimating the abilities of my kids. One is in an individual sport with winners and losers, and it can still be hard to know. Team sports in my opinion are much harder to assess, especially as a biased parent.
There is a lot of good information on this board, when I was starting this process I probably read most of the posts from the last couple of years unless they were clearly not relevant. I would start there.
I think the non-lacrosse specific advice is to have S put together an email to send to coaches with a summary of why he thinks he would be a good addition to their college team. He needs to put together a resume, which is mostly athletic but also has the key academic information. Also be sure that there is an email and phone number for one of his current coaches on the resume and email, and then make sure that coach knows he may be contacted. There are plenty of examples online of these. Make sure the emails are addressed to “Coach Smith” not just “Coach”. S put in at least a line or 2 in each email that was specific to every coach that he contacted, either something about their season or having an All American, or their venue, just anything to show that you aren’t sending a random email to everyone, you are emailing this coach because you want to go to HIS school and play for HIM. I also attached a transcript that showed GPA and class rank. RE: line should be Son Name, 2019, athletic honor or other attention getting stat, position. Or some variation of that.
Coaches can’t contact him back directly until September 1. Our experience has been a mix of “thanks for the info we will be in touch in September”, to a couple coaches emailing his high school coach to express interest and also ask for his assessment, to about half remaining silent. S sent out an update to give some information on his summer successes, and to let them know that he will be participating in a big recruiting event so they can (hopefully) be watching him compete there.
There are recruiting services that you can pay for, I think that if you are willing to do the research and the work then it probably isn’t necessary. But I suppose if you were trying to cast a very wide net and sports was the #1 consideration that might make it more worthwhile. S doesn’t really have 20 schools he is willing to play for, so it’s a manageable list for us to handle on our own.
Good luck.