<p>Interesting. I was interviewed at eight prep schools (Andover, Exeter, St. Paul's, Deerfield, Groton, Milton, Concord, and St. Mark's) and was not asked this question once. I didn't think about it at all. I have been to quite a few therapists, though none of them had to do with "me," per say. They were all given to me because a major life change happened (when my parents divorced,when my dad got married, and quite a few other times. I've had a lot of major life changes, and thus quite a few therapists.) </p>
<p>Therapy, and people who are in therapy aren't scary to me the way it is to some people, probably because I've been to a lot of therapists and know that being in therapy, or seeing a psychiatrist, does not make you insane or mentally unstable. It merely means that you are a human, and therefor deal with problems in life, which you can use some perspective on (that, or your parents have problems that they think you can use some perspective on :D).</p>
<p>I don't know if the application asked this question or not--my friend never said. I think probably not--because I don't think she would have been so surprised that her daughter was asked the question, had it been addressed in the application. I do know that the school did not suggest in any way that they offered therapeutic programs (supporting ADHD, etc..). The school presented itself as an academically rigourous college prep program. I think it was a demoniational type of school--maybe Episcopal? Anyway, it really turned my friend off. </p>
<p>I think NYC brings up a good point. If a school is asking a question about counseling--it would warrant some questions from the parents about the student population.</p>
<p>What does "RTC-caliber problems" mean? I don't know what "RTC" stands for. Some kind of treatment center? Thanks. </p>
<p>My son interviewed at several schools that would not be considered among the top 10 but are strong schools. He was not asked these questions, nor was I in the parent interview.</p>
<p>Gosh, there are "problem" students everywhere. This is a huge prejudice many seem to have a hard time dealing with. It's a very, very dirty prejudice that I'm surprised so many of you are openly admitting to.</p>
<p>Here's an anecdote:</p>
<p>My Exeter interviewer, an alumna, was very open about her experience as a student at Exeter. She said that one of her best friends got pregnant in 9TH GRADE while at the school (this is in the early 90's).. had the baby, her mother took care of it (she lived in CT), she visited every other weekend (by train) for the next 3 years until successfully graduating. This is at Exeter.. arguably the most competitive prep school (alongside Andover, of course). Not NMH or any other school you all consider to be full of "problem kids". I'd say a knocked up 9th grader would be considered a "problem child" by any means.</p>
<p>And what about all the drugs at prep schools? You seriously think NMH has more cokeheads than Choate? I doubt it.</p>
<p>To be honest, if you were worried about your kid's well being, I would recommend a less competitive school. At the top schools there seems to be more pressure since many of the kids who went had been preparing (at their parents' urging) to apply there their whole life. ..Now that calls for some therapy.</p>
<p>On a personal note, my son spent a short stay in a RTC because he was engaging in self-destructive behaviors following an orthopedic surgery. It was at this time that he was finally (after 9 years of counseling) diagnosed as PDD NOS - Aspergers Autistic. Basically, for those of you unfamiliar with autism, it is a sensory integration problem. Things that register one way to you and me are sensed entirely differently by autistic people. He was overwhelmed by the cast he was wearing, not from pain (which he has an incredibly high tolerance for). However, at the RTC, they were able to observe him 24/7 (instead of the weekly 50 minute hour of conventional counseling) and put together his behaviors and his social interaction with other residents to make a diagnosis. His counseling and other therapy since that diagnosis has been much more effective since that time. He still struggles (as he always will) and will struggle with things in life that most of us take for granted, but at least we have an understanding and a way to work with things. For this, I am grateful.</p>
<p>I bring this up in this thread as there has been a lot of negative things said or implied about boarding school populations and the character of students who have been through counseling and/or RTC type situations. At least those families have acknowledged a problem and are trying to do something to improve themselves.</p>
<p>Yes, many families still struggle with issues even after their child finishes at a RTC or after years of therapy. Schools choose which (if any) types of issues they are willing and capable of dealing with. Getting this information on the table before an admissions decision is made allows both the school and families to make a decision that is appropriate for both parties.</p>
<p>Many children have issues that have not been diagnosed or addressed and begin showing up under the change and pressure of a top boarding school, hence the references to problems at many of the top schools we've seen. I think we can say that no school is full of perfect children (nor is any child perfect). We as parents just have to make decisions about what our children can manage and monitor the situation. Good boarding schools will know your child as they live there and will keep you abreast of your child's issues. I know that we have gotten good, periodic reports on our D from her school.</p>
<p>I'm curious as to the difference you see between RTCs and inpatient psych/drug rehab facilities. I've always treated them as one and the same along a spectrum of treatment facilities.</p>
<p>Couldn't agree more w/ your stmt regarding kids w/ unidagnosed problems. As for kids struggling w/ issues after RTC or therapy, I would hope that no one would be so unforgiving to deny a child a second chance. And more importantly, I would want any school my daughter attended to firm but compassionate, especially in dealing with "problem" behavior. (D is a bit of a prude and often, I fear, too harsh on her peers and herself - - but that's another story.)</p>