How soon is too soon to recontact future roommate?

<p>Basically, how soon is too soon to send another e-mail or message to your future roommate? I sent one about a week ago to introduce myself but have yet to hear back from her.</p>

<p>I'm fairly shy and this is my first time living in a dorm, since I'm transferring to a school farther than I can commute daily. So needless to say, I'm nervous! I understand that it's summer and people have plans and jobs, and are just busy. But I have seen this gal online and posting on Facebook and our move in day is quickly approaching. </p>

<p>So how soon is too soon do you think? And, off topic, do you have any suggestions on getting to know your roommate/roommate survival?</p>

<p>Thanks everyone!</p>

<p><a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/college-life/1368755-too-soon-switch-my-new-roommate.html[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/college-life/1368755-too-soon-switch-my-new-roommate.html&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

<p>Read this, it’s pretty recent. The consensus is don’t do it, unless it’s a month or so later, since some people just don’t check their email over the summer/ever, and it’ll seem desperate. (Also, if you’re not a friend on facebook, the messages may not give notifications, so she may not see it there, either.) And if you do send another message, please, PLEASE don’t mention you were stalking her. That won’t set you off on a good foot.</p>

<p>As for getting to know your roommate, I barely did for either of mine. Don’t count on them being your friend, just hope that you get along well enough to survive. Survival tip: choose your battles wisely. Don’t be a doormat, but don’t complain over every little thing, either.</p>

<p>I should probably note, after reading your reply, that we are friends on Facebook. It pops up in my news feed; I think I’ve been to her actual page once when I initially friended her. So I’m not stalking or refreshing the page every two minutes.</p>

<p>I’m sorry for making that assumption - that was rude of me and I apologize. I don’t know why she’s not responding to you, but maybe she’s not as keen on talking to you beforehand as you are. I found it weird when my roommate contacted me beforehand, and we barely talked at all. Maybe she’s the same way? I’d imagine it’s hard to get to know someone online that you share nothing in common with beyond the same school and dorm. Do you actually need to discuss anything with her about moving in or the like? Otherwise, since you’re friends on there, I’d message her once more, then let it be. If she doesn’t want to talk, it might come across as a bit weird if you keep trying to contact her.</p>

<p>Again, I apologize for making that assumption. Sorry!</p>

<p>Yeah, only message her again if you have something you need to talk about. Last summer I messaged my roommate on FB just to say hi and connect, then never got a reply, but a few weeks later was presented with the opportunity to acquire a minifridge, and sent my roommate a message about this, to which she actually responded. Turns out she had missed my message the first time.</p>

<p>If you REALLY want to get into contact with her, make it about logistics and it’ll seem less weird.</p>

<p>I will say that this girl and I really didn’t click at all. It wasn’t bad, but we kinda just ignored each other! she was a sophomore with her own circle of friends. Basically my advice is you don’t need to be friends with your roommate, you just need to coexist, so don’t stress about it.</p>

<p>Maybe try and chat her when she is online that way you know she is at the computer. Or you can send her a message about buying a tv or fridge so it’s not like your desperate to talk, but instead you need her opinion</p>

<p>wait till she responds. she could be busy. unless you do have something really important to talk about</p>

<p>I would say to message her on FB but with something specific…like, do you already have a TV? or, Do you want me to bring xxxxxx?</p>

<p>do you know if she is a transfer student like you, or a first year student, or a student continuing on campus?</p>

<p>If there’s nothing to talk about bringing a TV, a rug, or something, there’s always the question of, “Hey, do you mind what bed/side of the room to get? Or do you want to decide who gets what before move-in?” There’s also, “Hey, I plan on waking up at (insert morning time here) for class, but I don’t want you waking up on my account. What time do you plan on waking up?” </p>

<p>You don’t necessarily have to try and get to know her before the semester. These types of questions are more to avoid any problems or misunderstandings.</p>

<p>Hmm… I’m at the opposite side of the spectrum. I met my roommate over FB yesterday and we’ve been talking a lot, mainly about our like and interests. He even asked me how tall and what build I am. lol I thought that was a little weird, but I didn’t just want to ignore the conversation. We go to a small Christian college in a small town, so I wasn’t too worried that he was going to kill me. (Beside, he is a body builder and was trying to find a gym partner.)</p>

<p>I say that whenever is a good time. Some people are a little shy, which is probably the reason why your roomie is not talking that much with you. Just realize that just because you’re roomies doesn’t mean that you will be best friends, so don’t be surprised if you only talk about dorm stuff.</p>

<p>Go ahead and leave her an email, or maybe a FB PM. Ask which method is the best way to contact her and etc. Some people are just not that open and willing to talk.</p>