<p>Just thought this would be good to discuss. My D will have to decline, reject one of two offers for admissions so....What are the recommendations for the letter--short and sweet? not burning bridges for possible transfer or grad school? Would love to hear what you all think should go into that letter before she sits down to write.</p>
<p>No letter. Just use the little reply card that they usually provide. It's not personal with them; it's their job. You won't be hurting anybody's feelings. They know their usual admissions yield and hence are <em>counting</em> on getting rejected by the usual perecentage of the admits. You'll just be a part of the expected percentage who decline the offer.</p>
<p>Don't worry about burning bridges. My S turned down School A, that he had actually previously said "yes" to. Circumstances changed and he withdrew that acceptance and chose another school.</p>
<p>Fast forward to one year later, when he had to transfer. He was accepted to School A as a transfer. You could have knocked me over with a feather. </p>
<p>P.S. We weren't even sure it was worth re-applying there because of the previous situation. But his advisor called and spoke to the school who said there would be no effect; transfer admissions are evaluated totally separately (even tho there is a question on the app that asks if you've applied previously, which of course he answered yes). I would have to imagine that grad school admissions are even more divorced from the freshman app process.</p>
<p>I think we all need to be aware that these "turn downs" by students of some of their acceptances are a very routine clerical situation at the schools, except in extremely rare instances. Just use the reply card or click the "will not attend" button on the website.</p>
<p>I lost those reply cards, and I was after May 1. Since I wanted to inform them as soon as possible (and didn't really feel like tracking down the reply cards), I sent emails to schools I was turning down or for which I didn't want to stay on the waitlist. I included where I was going and the scholarship money I got at the school. With a couple schools I explained what I liked about the school I chose and why I thought it was a better fit, and with a couple I included something that I really liked about their school if something stood out for me. I figure that information from a student turning them down is useful for them, particularly if the schools are on the same level. I got personal responses from admissions officers at two colleges thanking me for letting them know, wishing me luck, etc.</p>
<p>How about</p>
<p>"Thank you for your accptance of me. I know it took a lot of consideration among many factors. However, due to the large number of acceptaces that I have received and due to the insufficient financial aid package that you offered, I have accepted a position elsewhere. It was a tough decision though.</p>
<p>I wish you well throughout all of your endeavors"</p>
<p>Sincerely...</p>
<p>hahaha. that's funny.</p>
<p>Here's what I sent today:</p>
<p>
[quote]
</p>
<p>Hello,</p>
<p>I'm really sorry that I won't be attending Hamilton. I really like Hamilton, but unfortunately, I like Oberlin a little bit more. It was a very very hard decision to make. I would like to thank the admissions committee for thinking me worthy to be a Hamilton student, and especially the fin aid office for generously increasing my financial aid offer by $17,000.</p>
<p>I feel really bad about turning down the admission offer. I really wish I could attend Hamilton AND Oberlin. I'll always be wondering what it would have been like if I'd attended Hamilton.</p>
<p>Thanks for everything again!
<theonecurlyfry></theonecurlyfry></p>
<p>
[/quote]
</p>
<p>And I really meant all of this. Even if they're expecting X people to reject their offer, I'm sure they'll appreciate a personal note. They're people!</p>
<p>Why do the colleges you decline ask to know which college you will attend in the fall?</p>
<p>Vballer, they want to know who their competition is and why. It’s all part of their institutional research.</p>
<p>Why do the colleges you decline ask to know which college you will attend in the fall? </p>
<p>So they can see how they are faring against their competition.</p>
<p>There was another thread on this topic last week. Main points - do notify the schools you won’t be attending and do it promptly - it helps kids who are on the waitlist and it is the polite thing to do. Quick e-mail to admissions regional rep is fine or to general admissions e-mail also is fine. If you want to tell them whee you are going - they do appreciate that info - but you don’t have to if you feel that is private.</p>
<p>Main point - please let the schools know you will not be attending as soon as you are sure.</p>
<p>^^I agree it’s polite to notify as soon as you can. But it doesn’t help anyone on the waitlist to notify prior to the May 1st deadline. Schools don’t know what their yield is and whether they will be going to waitlist prior to that date. Declining on April 30th is the same as declining on April 2nd as far as the waitlist is concerned.</p>
<p>Our sons sent personal handwritten notes to schools where a staff person had been involved with them re merit offers and phone calls. I realize this is unnecessary but so much of just plain human touch is missing in society today and if my son’s had contacts at a personal LAC that were outstanding…they also put a 3-4 sentence note in the card. One of my son’s also thanked a school that tried very hard to give him a fair shake re EFC etc. We aren’t deluded enough to not realize that someone equally qualified would be filling their shoes however and that the college had a formula to factor in such things…so it isn’t personal at all, but if it was personal…it is a life skill to acknowledge.</p>
<p>coureur - disagree - and I have heard this directly from admissions reps - they know historically what their trend is with deposits on April 10th, April 20th, etc. If they arrive at April 15th and see the volume of deposits is below where it was on that date in prior years - they may start getting ready to go to the WL. I’m not saying they will call students prior to May 1 - but they will start making preparations to do so.</p>
<p>^^Sure, I can see where it might give schools a preview of how far into the waitlist the school will have to go and help them organize their waitlist effort. But the point I was disagreeing with was your statement that declining early would somehow help the <em>kids</em> on the waitlist. It will not. Schools do not start taking kids off the waitlist before May 1st.</p>
<p>Nobody cares. No one cares what you write. No one is going to judge it. No one is going to be disappointed. And no one is going to be remembering what you wrote later…even if they were the same people (which they’ll not be). </p>
<p>You are truly just a number, despite however they make you think its ‘personal’ so they can suck massive amounts of money from you-- its just part of marketing. No one is lying awake at night wondering why you wrote what you did.</p>
<p>See previous post. Double it.</p>
<p>^This is true, but I like your letter anyway CurlyFries and I think the admissions office will appreciate knowing that it was a close decision (I love Hamilton too). To illustrate the point of how some schools just do not care, and apparently do not care to read either, one school my D (nicely and with thanks) turned down an EA offer from last year had to be told often and repeatedly until mid-July! We kept getting FA awards, scheduling info, loan info, etc…and this was a school she had never even visited, nor had we sent in a deposit! Good grief, I thought they were going to show up and drag her off!</p>
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<p>It may not help a student on the waitlist, but it sure helps the administrative people who are tasked with figuring out the final accepted numbers if they can get that information settled over the month of April versus having it all hit on April 30th. Plus, it’s polite.</p>
<p>I do agree that it’s courteous and the right thing to do to notify them however is most convenient; however, I also agree with what Hanna said on (I think) a different thread - this isn’t handing back the engagement ring. Do it for the efficiency, not because anyone’s really crying in their soup that you’re not coming.</p>
<p>You know what would be fun? Try to get a copy of the rejection letter this specific school uses. I’m sure it is graceful. Then just adjust a few words to make it fitting for an institution instead of a person, and send it in! </p>
<p>Like you know, something like this:</p>
<p>You are an exceptional university, and based on all of your advertising, it is apparent that you have many wonderful attributes that will serve you well in years to come. I encourage you to remain confident as you continue to fill the class of 2010. Many fine students are eager to join such a passionate university such as yours. Be assured, you will find the right students for you.</p>
<p>I think such “cleverness” is wasted. Why be snarky to some administrative person in the admissions office who is going through and checking off who’s coming and who isn’t? He or she likely had little or nothing to do with the process.</p>