how well-read are AdCom officers usually?

College Essays
21

<p>OP, you need to worry less about using a bunch of big words and more about conveying ideas clearly and concisely. Adcoms do not want to read long, drawn out essays. Adding explanations of your literary references would be too much. </p>

<p>Try to word the passage so that even a casual reader would understand what you are trying to say. For example, let’s consider the book “Green Eggs & Ham.” Sam doesn’t want to try the green food. He refuses to eat it, even though the narrator bugs him to do so. If I want to compare my refusal to back down with the way Sam held out against the green food, I might write the following: "</p>

<p>All around me, voices press me to take the risk. “Go ahead. Try it. You might enjoy it.” I think of Sam, the character in Green Eggs & Ham who steadfastly refuses the narrator’s increasingly creative pleas to try a new food. Like Sam, I shake my head and refuse to give in. I will not be swayed by the manipulations of the crowd.</p>

<p>(Of course, this is simplistic — and because Sam DOES give in at the end, it might not be the best choice here — but you get the idea) If you choose to reference, write it in a way that allows the reader to understand why the heck you chose that reference. </p>

<p>Now read two other ways I could have written this passage: </p>

<p>All around me, voices press me to take the risk. “Go ahead. Try it. You might enjoy it.” Like Sam, I hold fast to my resolve. I will not be swayed to give in to the demands of the crowd.</p>

<p>All around me, voices press me to take the risk. ‘Go ahead. Try it. You might enjoy it.’ Like Sam in Green Eggs & Ham, I hold fast to my resolve. I will not be swayed to give in to the demands of the crowd.</p>

<p>The first passage I wrote gives enough info that even someone who isn’t familiar with GE&H can get the gist of my reference. The next two passages talk about Sam & even the book, but don’t tie the reference to a concrete idea. Do you see the difference? Hope it helps.</p>

22

<p>This is an interesting topic. I would assume that you are writing for a general but relatively literate audience. Words or cultural references that are going to be understood by the majority of such readers probably don’t need explanation. E.g., “… with the tenacity of Hugo’s Inspector Javert” would probably be fine without further explaining the reference.</p>

<p>An unusual technical term might or might not demand explanation. If it’s a passing reference not critical to understanding the thrust of the essay, you could probably skip it. Mentioning that a professor is a leader in isogloss research could probably slide by - the reader can look it up if he’s curious. If you are explaining something more central to your essay, though, you should either skip the jargon word, place it in context where its meaning is apparent, or include a very brief explanation. I find “imaginary lines analogous to isobars that each mark differentiation in a particular language feature” rather jargonesque itself. If you must define it, do so in a way that just about any reader will understand immediately.</p>

<p>Remember that you are writing for a bleary-eyed reader who has been plowing through essays about pet death, great moments in sport, why someone wants to cure cancer, etc. Don’t force the reader to plow through something that sounds like a senior thesis - entertain the reader, and let the reader feel your enthusiasm (or excitement, sorrow, etc.).</p>

23

<p>“How would you explain what your goals are in a program that married bioengineering and business economic?”</p>

<p>How about stating that you are interested in a program that marries bioengineering and business economics. You have discovered that this college offers X, Y, and Z courses/programs/research opportunities that will allow you to pursue your professional goals. No need to break your career goals down to the atomic level! Just tell the adcoms what attracted you to the school.</p>

<p>If you are really turned on by a certain program in the school, why not email the prof in charge & have a conversation with him about it? That is a more appropriate place to concentrate your detailed discussions. Sometimes profs can advocate for you to the admissions committee (not at all schools, but it doesn’t hurt to try). Even if you aren’t accepted, there is the possibility of working with the prof on summer research … so it can’t hurt.</p>

24

<p>Just to give you some perspective, I have an undergraduate degree in linguistics (20 years ago). Reading your post I had to check the meaning of “isogloss”; maybe I knew the word back then, but I don’t know it now. I read 1984 in 8th grade, I believe. I remember only the vaguest outline of the story and none of the characters’ names. </p>

<p>Part of good writing is figuring out your audience and writing for them. If you write something incomprehensible to your audience, you have failed. It is your failure, not theirs.</p>

25

<p>galoisien, I feel your pain. I learned be verbose in high school because my AP English teacher loved it, and have had to fight against that tendency ever since! I’m not always successful, but what I’ve realized is that often I write with overly-complex sentences because I’m insecure. I don’t want to leave a single opening or loophole for people to misunderstand my point or criticize my idea. At your age, that insecurity probably translated into feeling I needed to include two or three literary examples when one would have sufficed. </p>

<p>Relax! You’re obviously very bright and well-read. But part of intelligence, as others have pointed out, is the ability to understand others and communicate well with a variety of audiences.</p>

26

<p>

Stream of consciousness writing, a la Ulysses and James Joyce, is inappropriate for college essays as 1) audience and 2) intent differ completely. Also be sure to note the difference between profuse, complex, yet coherent sentences and rambling, awkward ones.</p>

<p>There is a difference between you:

</p>

<p>and Joyce:

</p>

<p>In my opinion, clarity and sincerity are two very important factors to take into consideration with college essays. If you stuff your essays up with technical jargon or esoteric allusions, you will reduce the former, and by association, likely reduce the latter.</p>

<p>You should show your essays to teachers (preferably not English) and other adults to get their opinions about whether your style is accessible. Also keep in mind that college admissions officers generally do not spend hours poring over the nuances of every student essay. It’s more like 2 minutes an essay, then onto the next one. If they don’t understand a reference, they will not pass it on to another department; they will skip over it and go on. Harry Bauld’s “On Writing the College Application Essay: The Key to Acceptance and the College of your Choice” describes what kind of people will be reading your essays and how much scrutiny and effort they will devote to them. I suggest that you purchase or borrow one of these kinds of books to understand who is going to look at your work.</p>

27

<p>Galoisien, I know exactly what you mean! I’m sorry that you’ve gotten such negative comments, I think it might have been the word ‘esoteric’ that got people going. I don’t think that the mentioning of literary characters should have gotten such an odd response. </p>

<p>I would never assume that an adcom would recognize a character like that… I almost did the same thing you did (I was referring to Phantom of the Opera, but I ended up cutting it out because it probably wouldn’t have made sense to someone who was unfamiliar with the book/music). I would have explained the characters a little better even though, yes, it would have interrupted your theme.</p>

<p>Even though I’m not familiar with ‘isogloss,’ if it was in context with your field of study I would have read it and moved on. The adcom will understand it is a part of your field, if they aren’t a science buff then they’ll just let it pass by.</p>

<p>So they may not get it, and I’d try to avoid it in the future, but I don’t think you should be burned at the stake for it. It’s an honest mistake, it doesn’t mean you were trying to sound superior…</p>

28

<p>what school is this?</p>

<p>If it’s like, Harvard, all of their readers are relatively well-versed and intelligent and one can expect them to understand any obscure references. Plus, this being some impressive school, these people’ll prolly take the time to look up the terms.</p>

<p>Some small state school? I wouldn’t bank on it.</p>

29

<p>

</p>

<p>. No.</p>

30

<p>

</p>

<p>OK, I’m a fairly well-read, intelligent guy, on a par with most AdCom people. I can see that this is probably an important point you’re trying to make - if only I had some earthly clue as to what you’re talking about. I could spend time and track it down, but why? From this side it looks an awfully lot like you’re trying to show off.</p>

<p>You asked if this style of writing was appropriate. The general consensus seems “no.” Moving on.</p>

31

<p>No, name-dropping and jargon-dumping like that in your essays was not a good idea. The lines you quoted and your subsequent justifications make you sound like a big ol’ ■■■■■■.</p>

<p>If you really can’t fit a clear, concise explanation of a specialized term or obscure reference in your essay, then you need to leave it out. You keep on insisting that there wasn’t any other way to bring your point across, but if the reader doesn’t get the reference (and please, stop thinking any well-read person would get the ones you made–I’ve read 1984 and have a good memory, but Mr. Charrington’s name doesn’t immediately spring to mind) then the point hasn’t been made at all.</p>

<p>It’s a crappy situation, because the essays are already sent and the mistakes have already been made. You can’t do anything about it now, so stop dwelling and move on.</p>

32

<p>It’s not that I didn’t catch your references - I remember the Savage and Mustapha Mond from Brave New World, and I read for pleasure quite a lot - but something about all the name dropping and over the top linguistics / econ explanations really get on my nerves. basically agree with Pseudonym. Just because your adcom officer is well read (which he/she might very well be) doesn’t mean he will appreciate this style of writing.</p>

33

<p>It’s sounds like you’re trying to show the ADcom how well-read YOU are.
As others have mentioned, the essay isn’t the place for that in an application, and saying that you have to make up for the rest of your application isn’t a good enough excuse.</p>

34

<p>Let’s assume, for a moment, that galoisien isn’t pulling our collective legs.</p>

<p>galoisien, you’re either refreshingly naive, a pedant, or incapable of compromising on your “principles.”</p>

<p>I’m going with refreshingly naive.</p>

35

<p>I suggest you don’t fret anymore about what you wrote since you can’t change it… Just take the responses as constructive criticism. If you possess the ability to learn from your mistakes, you’ll excel no matter where you end up.
And I suggest that the rest of you people chill…you’re kind of viscious…</p>

36

<p>The last thing you want them to think is that you’re completely in love with yourself. Using esoteric terms or technobabble is a sure way to get that feeling across.</p>

37

<p>Ugh, that’s all I have to say. OP, You sound arrogant and obnoxious with the literary examples…not to mention all your posts after. Honestly, I’ve read many classics, and your writing is WAY too wordy. I also agree you probably should have just picked one and maybe put in (from 1984) or whatever. You throw in a lot of big words, and it’s obvious you’re just throwing in big words for the sake of it. You can explain to me a lot of times that it wasn’t your “intention” to say big words, but it comes off very inauthentic.</p>

<p>As a last point, it sounds like you are very insecure and must feel “superior” to everyone. For example, you told off someone by saying that “they didn’t like Dickens, huh?”, comparing yourself to Dickens and acting like the other poster was unintelligent.</p>

<p>Edit: As I’m reading pg 2 and pg 3 of this thread after writing my initial response, I’ve come to think of one of those "either/or " questions. It was something like, “Would you rather be the smartest person/leader on Earth but not able to communicate your ideas, or be a good leader and the ability to communicate well?” I feel you would take the former…</p>

38

<p>I’d hope members of the AdCom are smart and well-read, but as well-read as the English faculty or as knowledgeable in science as the Biology prof? Why would you expect that?</p>

39

<p>It’s a very fine line… but don’t forget that the best writers and speakers get powerful and complex messages across without having to use overly complex words or literary examples (think Dr King’s speeches, JFK’s speeches, FDR’s speeches… although yes the latter two didn’t write most of them). Most reasonable well educated people have, at one point or another, read many (although likely not all) of the great works of literature. However, do they use citiations from those works in the course of their daily writing or conversation… probably not. </p>

<p>There are some cases where using such literary examples may be OK; however just throwing them in there for the sake of throwing them in there (or even worse doing it to show off that you know such things) just comes across as looking silly and obnoxious.</p>

<p>Remember that you likely don’t know who will be reading the essays… maybe the person who reads it can’t stand the work of literature you’re citing (or didn’t read it). In those cases your reference is either lost or, even worse, misinterpreted. The best writers can get their message across with ‘plain’, but very creative, language… don’t forget that!</p>

40

<p>Does anyone here use the word “esoteric” with any frequency in their daily conversations?
Whenever I see that word, I want to laugh. I think: “PRETENTIOUS!”</p>

<p>To answer your question, it depends on the caliber of the school you’re applying to.
Any well-educated person should in turn be reasonably well-read.</p>

<p>If I read a personal essay that sounded more like an English essay than a pouring out of the soul, I would gag and groan, and throw your junk in the “rejected” bin.</p>