<p>A school can attribute a dollar amount to the non working parent.....I mean if she were to get a job at $10/hour how much difference would it make. So much is variable in these circumstances.....folks care for elder or ill family members, younger sibs......heavy volunteer or low pay jobs.</p>
<p>Never heard that. Maybe that's the case at some schools. My niece's mom doesn't work and they had to pay $3,500 (less some years) for Exeter...including the year they sold their house for $950K!!! Go figure.</p>
<p>FYI-my last post was in response to dabost's last post</p>
<p>Exeter does say in its current</a> financial aid materials that it may impute income to a nonworking parent, as it expects both parents (usually) to work to support their children's education. "Exeter reserves the right to 'impute' an income for a non-working parent in determining a familys financial need." It will be interesting to see how that process applies in our case (we both work, but have younger children and a quadriplegic parent to take care of).</p>
<p>Fascinating discussion -- as usual, I can see the merits of every point of view...! Thanks for the personal experiences as well, very informative!!</p>
<p>That financial info is encouraging. I was thinking since we had a moderately decent income ($100k a little plus) we'd be out of the running, aid-wise (even though we have large 'lifestyle' [house/car] expenses). Those stories really provided a different (hopeful) perspective!</p>
<p>Guess we'll see how it goes. </p>
<p>Kind of ironically, this week I pulled my 4 year old daughter out of a very expensive, exceptionally well-regarded preschool (the best I'd seen anywhere, ever -- looked like a mini-college campus, with farm animals, hiking trails, etc.). Despite the stellar "opportunity" -- she just did better spending more time at home with the family, and relaxing outside a high-pressure environment. I was absolutely <em>enamoured</em> of this high end pre/elem school (at first). It was a lesson about the value of family-time, knowing your child and not being blinded by prestige. :-) Of course -- can't extrapolate from preschooler to highschooler -- but it almost makes me more reluctant to pursue the high-end boarding school route [not rational, I realize..!].Though son is getting more gung-ho by the day....</p>
<p>:-)</p>
<p>Baseballmom - I've got no problem with the concept that the child can be encouraged to apply, IF he understands full well the financial limitations. To the extent that they are able, I hope that Jolynne and her husband are able to be absolutely clear with their son about their bottom line financially, and stick to their guns on that. In that respect, I agree that it is a "sin" that your friend's daughter "cried for weeks" when her mom said no to her desire to go to St. Pauls -- that is, I certainly am glad that I taught my kids in early childhood that "no" means "no". Only about 3 weeks ago my daughter told me that she wanted to go to Europe this summer - I told her that I thought her plan was outside the scope of what I as a parent should reasonably pay for. End of conversation. The next thing I knew, my daughter was going off at 7 am on a Saturday morning to work the first shift on her new job, with the idea of earning the money on her own. </p>
<p>Jolynne -- I do think you have things well in hand - and perhaps the decision to pull your daughter out of the pricey preschool will free up some funds that can be used to help your son, at least for his first year. Just don't let anyone pressure you into coming up with funds you don't have because of the perceived value of the private "education", or feel guilty if the final decision is "no" over what seems a relatively small amount. I keep thinking about lderochi's kid - the kid who became a volunteer firefighter at age 16 in the "Who chooses the college?" thread. I'll bet that kid is head and shoulders above the rest of his peers in terms of maturity and the beneficiary of an education that could never be matched in the classroom -- he certainly found challenge in his life, and it didn't cost his parents a dime. So, the moral is: if it turns out that the money isn't there for your son's boarding school, the best thing you can do is help him broaden his horizons. No matter how wonderful his chosen school, there are opportunities to be found everywhere for those who are willing to see them.</p>
<p>Thanks calmom, wise words. :-)</p>
<p>I'm thinking back about earlier comment about the 'gold standard hs educ.' potentially leaving no funding for college-- leading to lower tier school for that stage.</p>
<p>Certainly <em>lots</em> of valuable ideas to consider!!</p>
<p>I totally agree with calmom. My D is applying to boarding schools, but she fully understands that she cannot go unless she gets at least some merit aid and/or financial aid. While she would love to attend some of the boarding schools we have toured, she is fully willing to attend the local private day school or public school if necessary. While there are some great boarding schools, there are so many other opportunities out there for academically motivated children. Though my D hasn't felt particulary challenged by her current school, she has done academic camps and several sessions of CTY, which have more than given her the challenges she is looking for. Unless a school is just plain "horrible," a motivated child with the right work ethics will succeed regardless of where he/she attends school.</p>
<p>True, dabost. I'm trying to tell my son that: "do well, and you can be <em>great</em> at your public school, given your abilities.." He's just really excited about the whole boarding school idea, so looks like we'll be doing the app process. Maybe by next fall I can up my working hours to make some partial tuition more feasible (we'll see...!).</p>
<p>Again, I very much appreciate all the great ideas, suggestions and perspectives on this issue! :-) :-)</p>
<p>dxu --</p>
<p>The interviewer is trying to find out if you fit into their school. It's basically a getting to know you interview on both sides -- you should prepare some questions about the school to make it a two-way conversation. In addition, it's also a chance to sell you on the school.</p>
<p>There won't be any questions that you can't answer -- it's about who is this kid and will this particular student succeed in the environment we have to offer. </p>
<p>Every school runs the process a little differently -- but in my experience, the admissions department will meet with both parents and student, you'll have a tour, and certain faculty and coaches will stop by the admissions area during your visit if you have told them ahead of time that you are very interested in photography or physics or lacrosse or track -- or WHATEVER!</p>
<p>Make sure that you spend your time on campus learning about the school so you can make an informed decision about which boarding school is the best choice for you.</p>
<p>dxu,</p>
<p>My son's had one interview and it was a little 'different' (young interviewer, I think). He asked him a lot of one word answer questions ("What was the name of your tour guide?" then later: "Describe each of your family members in one word.").</p>
<p>In prepping son, I told him to use questions about himself as opportunities to share a little bit, and avoid one word answers at all costs (LOL!). That's a general rule of adult conversation (keeps things flowing). E.g., when asked what his outside school activities were, rather than providing a list, incorporate a little bit about <em>why</em> he thought these were rewarding. He had a chance to do this at certain points during his intervew.</p>
<p>I said "...and why?" is implicit in every factually-oriented question during an admissions process. </p>
<p>I'm not super-experienced in these things, but that seems a rule that could generally apply....</p>
<p>Good luck!</p>
<p>Okey-dokey... thanks a lot. any other advice on applying???</p>
<p>Be sure to read all the latest posts on the boarding school threads on College Confidential's High School Life forum, which I know you have found.</p>
<p>Where is that, tokenadult?</p>