Hypothetical Situation

<p>Heres the Situation.</p>

<p>A couple people from your High School got accepted to the same school as you and one of them is a good friend of yours. You both decide not to room together obviously. But you hung out quite a bit before college for years. </p>

<p>Now you are both moved in and been at school for a couple weeks. You hung out a little bit but not much because you're trying to branch out. Your roommate on the other hand who knows nobody coming in has been hanging out with your good friend from High School more than you have. They both are "good buddies" now. </p>

<p>What do you think?</p>

<p>Good for roommate? It sounds like everybody is getting exactly what they need.</p>

<p>What’s the problem?</p>

<p>Somehow, I don’t think this is all that hypothetical. </p>

<p>I don’t think that its a bad thing that the (your?) roomate and the good friend are close. You have a common friend now and how is that hurting anyone? Unless you don’t like the roommate. I became good friends with another friend of mine’s BFF from home last year when said common friend sort of (for lack of a better word) dumped us for a guy and his friends. I don’t think she had a problem with that at all. </p>

<p>I hate to be…preachy, but don’t give the roommate an “this is MY friend, not yours” thing. You don’t own your friends. You can’t tell them who they can and cannot hang out with. You won’t have friends for long if you do. You can’t be clingy with people. They tend not to like it. Are the friend and the roommate in a class together? Are they in the same major? </p>

<p>You also said that you were trying to branch out. Maybe your friend is too. And by not hanging out with your friend, you alienated him. Not hanging out with your HS friends because you want to “branch out” and then getting angry when they don’t hang with you anymore is (if you’ll pardon me) getting what you’re asking for. You can’t ignore people to make new friends. What was wrong with your old friend? Did you just not like them anymore? </p>

<p>A whole bunch of people from my high school (nine including myself) go to my college. I don’t hang out with any of them. I did this by choice - I wasn’t really friends with them anyway, why would I be now? - but I don’t ignore them for the sake of making new friends. I’m in a class with two of them now. If they would ask me to study with them, or something, I wouldn’t turn them down. But I wouldn’t go up to them and ask to hang out. I’m also getting books from another person from my high school in order who took one of my classes last semester. But that’s me. </p>

<p>If you have a problem with this, why not make some time to hang out with your friend and your roommate? Invite both of them to get something to eat sometime. Do something as a group. You can’t really stop them from being friends and to do so would be a really jerk-y thing to do. Alternatively, are you two maybe not as good of friends as you thought you were? Its perfectly normal for people who were friends in HS to grow apart in college. If that’s the case, try to make new friends. Join a few clubs or something. Don’t be anti-club and then get mad when everyone around you is involved and has friends and you don’t. I’ve heard from too many whiny people about this same thing. </p>

<p>I’m sorry if I said something to upset you. I’m assuming that (like I said) that this isn’t really hypothetical - is it ever? - but I’m going to tell the truth.</p>

<p>friends aren’t your property, wouldn’t you want them to be happy? :)</p>