<p>I suspect you'll find your fair share of nerds in Michigan too (and I do say that lovingly!)</p>
<p>Frecklybeckly: You are entitled to be sad. Does it help to assure you that this will pass? And to tell you that you have a glorious singing voice, and that your luminous personality shines through each of your posts?</p>
<p>Pedsox:</p>
<p>It's soooo hard to be the other twin too, isn't it???? You deserve to bask in your accomplishments as well, even though you are hurting for your brother. </p>
<p>A heartfelt congratulations to you on your accomplishments.</p>
<p>TwinMom</p>
<p>A postscript, Becky. I keep thinking about your fathers remark about Yale, and I realize that this must be a tough situation for him as well, since Yale has simultaneously made his son so happy and his daughter so sad. I wonder if hes worrying that youll find it hard to move on from the theoretical joys of Yale to the real ones awaiting you at the University of Michigan, so when you talk about Yale, he might feel as if his worst fears are coming true. </p>
<p>As parents, its so hard to see our kids in pain that we sometimes arent as wise and patient as we mean to be. Some 30 years later, I still remember my father yelling at me, in response to my fears of not finding a job in my chosen field: For heavens sake, stop going on about it! I told you it would all work out! At the time I was hurt and angrywhy wasnt he more sympathetic?but now I realize he felt my distress so deeply that he just couldnt bear to watch. However clumsy and counter-productive it might have been, he was trying to order me to be happy.</p>
<p>This has got to be an awkward moment for your family, but better times are coming soon--I promise.</p>
<p>My two Ds are just two years apart, and it took great effort to make sure the had their own dreams, and they do. So, be thrilled you are going to such a great school...in my opinion, your brother seems to be a bit clueless to how you feel....if he is being a bit big headed, then say, "I am so happy for you, aren't you happy for me?" What you need to do is remind your brother and your parents that you got into a great school, that you will do really well and you just know that they are proud of you...</p>
<p>feckless freckly; ooooooooooh. </p>
<p>I feel your pain. I have a younger brother who was a Sun God all the way through high school. Sooooooo annoying. He was a gifted academic (valedictorian), musician and he had compassion to rival Mother Teresa. </p>
<p>When I was 7 years old, I conned him up to the third floor of our house, and into into a trunk--with a loaf of bread. I thought if he would disappear for a few days, my mother might appreciate her very bright but normal children. </p>
<p>Christ-figure that he was, he stepped into that trunk with a big smile, clutching the bread. Mother was NOT impressed. </p>
<p>But........All that adult adulation and expectation did not work out very well for him. In his continuing quest for extraordinariness, he botched a couple of basic life choices; ie wife selection, employee selection.</p>
<p>For the past decade, my parents have been very worried about him and their grandchildren. Very worried. <em>tries not to smile</em></p>
<p>Meanwhile, Ms High School Trainwreck managed to make some fantastic life choices, starting at the end of sophomore year of university. Oh yeah, we're talking total eclipse of the Sun God. Even he admits it--with pure envy in his eyes. He would trade places with me in a New York minute.</p>
<p>Yale, shmale. You can always go there for grad school. Do you really want to occupy the same quads as the Sun God? Haven't you had enough already?</p>
<p>In some ways, you have more freedom. Go for it! :)</p>
<p>:) I think I also should clarify that although he was accepted to Yale, he intends to (and has since he was accepted EA) matriculate to Harvard.</p>
<p>Well, then I hope Yale sees the freckly light and sends you the thick letter.</p>
<p>Double ouch on your dad's comment, huh?</p>
<p>Well Becky, I'll just have to say that I'm not the least bit worried about you. You have too much going for you to be knocked down by this and four years from now, whether you're getting your degree from Mich or Yale or maybe even somewhere else that you transferred to during that time, you won't even care about this. You are talented and I've got a CD to prove it...</p>
<p>Just one more parent sending you cyber-hugs, Becky! I was at UM for grad school and loved it. You will too! And trust me, there are all kinds of people in Ann Arbor. And it is such a great college town. You will surely find people you resonate with! And to sing with, too!</p>
<p>Freckly,
I read somewhere a while ago that people who overcome adversity and disappointment in their early years often go on to become more successful than those who have always had life on a stick, so to speak. Resiliency is a difficult, painful attribute to acquire, but oh, so valuable an asset for your life's journey. And when success does find you -- and it will -- I bet you will savor it more than you would have if you'd been accepted to all the schools your twin got into. Go to Michigan and take it by storm, girl!</p>
<p>Becky,</p>
<p>Last May I was in London on a business trip and had a couple of hours to kill before dinner time. I was walking around town alone and came across a couple of young men in tuxedos inviting passersby to a concert starting in five minutes in this neat old church. Well why not? So I went. </p>
<p>It was the University of Michigan men's a capella singing group - the second oldest such college group in the US - right there in the middle of London. It wasn't the Whiffenpoofs - it was Michigan. And the concert was great. One soloist sang a version of Leonard Cohen's "Hallelujah" (featured in the movie Shrek) that just about brought tears to my eyes. And I'm not the lachrymose type.</p>
<p>Near the end of the concert, as they always do, they sang the Michigan fight song. And apparently at one certain part of the song all true Wolverines pump their fists in the air twice in tempo with the music. And sure enough scattered among the 200 or so English men and women in the audience about a half dozen or so pumped their fists in the air right on cue. And I thought: "How neat! All the way out here in London there are loyal Woverines still loving their school."</p>
<p>So who cares about Yale or Harvard? Go to Michigan and have a great time. Be a Wolverine and pump your fist in the air with the rest. With your voice, I'm sure you will be touring London with the women's or coed singing groups if you so wish. It's all waiting for you out there. The whole experience. Go get it!</p>
<p>Coureur, what a lovely post! So perfectly suited to Becky! You have me a bit teary here, but I'm also singing and pumping my fist in the air: Hail, to the victors valiant....</p>
<p>Becky - I know a young instrumentalist from our area who had Yale for a first choice last year, and was not happy about being deferred and then rejected. That is, until she got to Michigan last September where she couldn't be happier. That's my prediction for you!</p>
<p>Wow, the support here is overwhelming. Coureur, what a perfectly fantastic story. Thank you all so much.</p>
<p>Coureur, What a wonderful story! I want to go to London and pump my fist. That song still gives me the shivers.</p>
<p>FB, I'm a Michigan alum. I was pretty clueless at the time and didn't take advantage of much that was offered but I got a fine education.
I've now lived and traveled all over the world and I can tell you emphatically everyone knows and respects Michigan. To me it has a kind of mythic, archetypical aura: a reflection of what's great about an American education and America in general. </p>
<p>You're going to have a wonderful time!</p>
<p>Becky, you really are a great kid, we all wish you well here. Go to Michigan, establish your own identity there. Who knows, you will be famous one day and we will all get tickets to your performances!! Don't worry too much about Yale (I know it's easy for me to say). This is just a temporary phase, it too shall pass.</p>
<p>The Big Chill</p>
<p>FB: another MIchiigan alumni here--Michigan is a great place, especially if you're in the Honors program. There are tremendous opportunities, and I studied with incredible, world class professors. Ann Arbor is a wonderful town; I'm going out there in a couple weeks.</p>
<p>It was my son's close second choice; if he hadn't gotten into his ED school, he was going to stop sending apps, and happily be a Wolverine. And he still misses the chance to see real football!</p>
<p>Becky: On a practical note, I know you are waiting to hear from Michigan Honors. If you haven't done it already, you should contact the Honors Program to see where they are in the process. Last year, as of about this time, my daughter had not yet gotten an answer from the program. She inquired, and they asked her to update her application with any new academic awards, honors, etc. and with a brief essay about why she and Michigan Honors would be a good fit. She did all that. She got a "yes" answer from the program within a week or two.</p>