<p>Hi, I'm a freshman in high school and my birthday is literally two days aways!! So I have a 3.9 GPA, well had until my Spanish II teacher put my grades in the on-line grading book and my GPA went all the way down to a 3.2. I was devastated. I'm also a student- athlete and play basketball at my school. In order to play we have to maintain a c average in all our classes. Well I have a 100 in journalism, 97 in geometry, and a 99 in earth/ environmental sciences. I got switched into Spanish II last minute and I'm not doing well in it at all. I have a 77 in that class. It's bringing my GPA down completely and I'm struggling. So she gave a pop quiz today and I had a copy of my notes folded up in my pencil bag. Well we have a senior who is a teachers aid and usually he sleeps or is on his phone, but today of all days he decided to pay attention and he saw me. So he goes and tells my teacher and she takes my paper and gives me an automatic zero. Well I'm extremely nervous and I get off the bus to walk home and my grandma is talking to my teacher on the phone. Well my grandma asks me about it and I break out in tears and tell her everything. I really want to get a scholarship to a really good college and I need my GPA to be really good and this class is the only class that's bringing me down. Well what should I do because my mom is throwing this amazing birthday party in like two days and I have a big birthday weekend planned. I'm mortified about what happened and I'm really scared to tell my mom. My grandma says it's up to me to tell her so what do I do?? I really hate disappointing my mom plus I play basketball and if coach finds out I'm probably going to be benched for a really long time and maybe kicked off the team. I really need help because I can't take the guilt, but I don't want to disappoint my mom. Plus next week is homecoming week and I'm running for freshman homecoming queen. If my mom finds out she definitely won't let me go to homecoming and I forfeit my chances of winning. Please help me I'm freaking out!!!!</p>
<p>There are two things to consider here and the most important one is the cheating and your relationship with your mom. First, no matter whether you got caught or not, you know it was wrong. The good news is that you have learned this and you can choose not to do this again.</p>
<p>Now you have your relationship with your mom to consider. Unless you have an abusive parent and are in danger, ( it doesn’t sound like this is the case) you have to tell her as soon as you can. When- and she will- she finds out, she will be disappointed that you didn’t tell her until after your party and homecoming. You have a very wise grandma who is allowing you to be the one to tell her, so that she doesn’t hear it from someone else. Your grandma knows this because she has raised children too. </p>
<p>You made a mistake, but it doesn’t have to define you because you don’t have to cheat again. Your mother loves you and will forgive you. If she takes away privileges that is her way of raising you to not be a cheater, and she loves you enough to not let you be one. </p>
<p>Now for the second problem. You seem like a good student. This doesn’t mean you don’t have to work hard. It seems like you do, yet your effort to do well in Spanish is not paying off. You said it yourself that you do not feel ready for the class. If this isn’t the right class for you, you should approach the school to be put back in Spanish 1. If for some reason they don’t , then perhaps you can get a tutor or someone to help you learn the material better. </p>
<p>Good luck- this will get better and you can go back to being the good student that you are. </p>
<p>Pennylane has given excellent advice and I second it. If you want have your grandmom there when you tell your mom. She may be a calming influence. Just suck it up and tell–better now than later.</p>
<p>The fact that there are so many consequences is what makes cheating so exciting! </p>
<p>I think that a zero on a pop quiz is a pretty small consequence, grade wise. How much does it count toward your overall grade? I bet not very much. What is more of a concern is all the people who might find out, such as your mom or your coach. I hope your mom takes it well and that you have a nice birthday. </p>
<p>Tell your mom, apologize for it, don’t do it again. If it means you can’t go to homecoming then you can’t go, you’ll get over it. Your mom isn’t going to hold this over you forever because you made one mistake. </p>
<p>Tell your mom ASAP and whatever the consequences, accept them. It’s a lot more mature to fess up and clear the air. Then get back into the Spanish 1 course. And no more cheating. Who needs this kind of stress?! Good luck and happy birthday!</p>
<p>Tell your mom, apologize, and accept the consequences of your actions with grace. I know it feels like you’ve done something that you can’t recover from, but trust me when I tell you that you will recover and everything will be ok. The right thing to do is to sincerely own your mistake and vow to never do it again. It may take some time for your mom to trust you again, or get past the disappointment, but she will and she will love you just the same even in the midst of the disappointment.</p>
<p>When my daughter was a sophomore in high school she got caught smoking pot. I’ve never been more disappointed in her than when I found out. She was suspended for ten days, pulled from a concert for a performing group she was in, had to take a drug education class, and had to go in front of a disciplinary hearing to face possible expulsion. The suspension gave her the worst quarter she had her entire high school career. </p>
<p>It was a dumb decision made by a kid who was very stressed over difficult classes (high ambition, high drive, much like you), and listened to a couple of not-so-great influences about how to deal with the stress rather than admit to me or her dad that she was struggling. She accepted her consequences without a single complaint or protest, worked on some better stress relieving activities, and moved on from her mistake by earning our trust again and never repeating her bad decision. She’s currently a freshman at Ohio State and doing very well.</p>
<p>Agree, tell your mom and don’t do it again. In the long term you will be a much happier and more satisfied person if you achieve what you achieve on your own. Cheating is a short-sighted, short term high - doing it on your own and you own it…forever…I also agree that cheating is something that won’t follow you through life - like an MIP or a pot possession charge in a state where pot isn’t legal so have not ruined your life so the fact that it bothers you is good. Don’t do it again. </p>
<p>Why are you in Spanish 2? Are you doing the work and still struggling? The root of the cheating is your feeling inadequate in the class for whatever reason. I would definitely get changed back to Spanish 1.</p>
<p>Rip off the band aid and tell your mom. It’s just going to weigh you down until you do and cause other problems, like lack of sleep, etc… which will effect other areas of your life. You are fortunate to have so minor consequences. Don’t do it again. I’m sure you won’t. </p>
<p>Take a deep breath and just say it.</p>
<p>Tell your mom the truth. And explain that you need help to decide what to do about the Spanish class. This is a chance to learn how to determine when you are in over your head. Maybe you can learn to ask for help sooner. Us mom’s can be way more understanding than you think! </p>
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<p>I don’t know about TC’s school but at my high school I remember it was not unheard of for people to just start in the 2nd or 3rd year of a language because maybe they learned some in middle school or outside of school. Others would just start in the 2nd year even if they didn’t know it at all because they thought “I’m smart, I can figure this out.”</p>
<p>I agree that it’s not a very good idea.</p>
<p>It looks like you aren’t the only one with a cheat sheet in their pencil case.</p>
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<p>Own up to it, learn your lesson, never cheat again, and write an amazing college app essay about your experience.</p>
<p>Lying about it to anyone will not help.</p>
<p>And PS - some of us, teachers and generic exam proctors alike, look like we aren’t paying attention and we are. I tend to sit at my computer and type while I proctor exams, but I am looking at the class 99% of the time. It gives cheaters a false sense of security.</p>
<p>You are lucky if you only got a zero on that quiz, and nothing else happened.</p>
<p>I agree with all the above…consider if you should take Spanish 1 or get extra help in Spanish 2</p>
<p>It’s not our mistakes that define us. It’s how we deal with our mistakes. Talk to your mom, make a plan to improve in Spanish, and prove yourself a person of integrity. </p>
<p>Nishele - If you are still reading this… 1) Tell your mom 2) remember this feeling, and NEVER cheat again 3) move on… it will be ok</p>