I have been contemplating whether or not I should transfer schools. I am currently attending a college that was my top college and has one of the best programs for my major. Something here just doesn’t feel right. I have a lot of free time and have yet to get involved in activities because none of them interest me. I don’t love how my major runs the program. The thing keeping me from transferring are my friends. I’ve made the best friends ever here. Two of my roommates and I are already talking about being at each other’s weddings. I’ve told them and our other friend that I am considering transferring and although they are supportive of me, they do not want me to go. I really do not want to leave them, but I think they are the only things keeping me here. The environment isn’t my favorite and the campus is a tad too small for my taste. Any advice on what I should do or what I should be thinking about?
I suggest you spend your free time figuring out what exactly you mean by “something doesn’t feel right.”
Counseling would be a great place to start. It is not wrong of you to have doubts, but you don’t want to transfer until you understand what is missing/wrong about the school you attend. How will you know a new school is right for you if you can’t articulate the reason for your discomfort now?
Having great friends is a factor you should consider as you make your decision. What activities do your friends participate in, and could you join them in those activities/clubs? Are these friends you met at college, or high school friends you hold on to instead of being open to new people on campus?
Friends and social engagement at school can ground you and support you when academics get really tough. Having friends to lean on, people who can encourage you after a bad test or when you are facing academic deadline pressures.
Can you earn a degree in your major at this college? Will the reputation of your degree/college position you well for a job or grad school? Can you live with the academic structure of your major if the social aspects of your school were more engaging?
What are you actually doing with your friends on campus? It seems interesting that you have solid friendships but feel no connection to the school? There is no right or wrong answer here, just trying to give you something to think on.
It would seem too late to transfer for Spring semester. I suggest you put together a short list of transfer colleges, figure out what would be required of you to be a qualified transfer applicant, and focus on academic study.
At the same time, I challenge you to join some club or activity on campus. Anything. Choose something one of your close friends is already engaged in. Attend a sports or music or theater performance. Go to open office hours for one of your professors in your major. Ask questions about future career or just a homework question. Invest in a relationship with a professor who might later on give you a good recommendation for job or grad school.
Prepare for a transfer, but at the same time make efforts to like the place you are at. So far it seems you may not have made the effort to participate in all this current school has to offer.
Nobody here can or should tell you if you should transfer. I transferred after freshman year to a college that was far superior in my major. I’m glad I did it because the academics and professional opportunities were far greater but it was difficult. Here are a few things to keep in mind.
– The grass is not always greener on the other side. Think carefully about what you would be giving up if you were to leave your current college.
– It is harder to find friends as a transfer student. Many strong friendships are made freshman year and it takes a lot of work and some luck to break into social groups as a transfer. I had the best of circumstances – I was put into a suite and my two suite-mates became good friends, I also made a good friend who also transferred in and was in my major, and of course I met other friends along the way in classes and activities – but I do think my social circle would have been a good bit wider had I started at that college as a freshman.
–Not all of your credits may be accepted at your next school. Be sure you can finish in 4 years.
–I had a circumstance where I took a prerequisite at my first school and the follow-up course at the school I transferred into. It turns out the prerequisite class I took did not at all prepare me for the next class – It was a real struggle to get through the second class simply because I did not have the proper background.
–In general it is difficult to be new to a situation when the vast majority of your peers are already settled into a routine, are used to the academics etc.
–If it is an issue financial aid for transfer students is generally poor.
In your case it sounds like you are in a great program (no program is perfect) and have great friends. It sounds to me that you might way to look at ways to make your school work better for you. It is hard to believe there are zero activities on campus that have any interest to you (my D went to a small LAC and there was a wide and diverse array of things one could be involved in). And if the campus feels small you may want to consider a semester (or perhaps a year) abroad to shake things up a bit.
If you feel you want to transfer then I would create a list of schools that appear to be affordable options and define in your own mind what specifically those colleges can offer that yours does not.
In the end it has to be your choice. There is no right or wrong answer. As I said I would make the choice to transfer again but I had a very specific reason to make the move. All I can say is take the time to carefully weigh what you will be giving up versus what you think you might get if you transfer.
I’d suggest you try out a few activities. And consider going abroad or off campus to study for part or all of junior year.
Sometimes, you join activities to have a role, make a contribution, or just try it out. What we do is as important as the major and friends, in both shaping our identities and making us feel we’re in the right place. I’d worry if my kids just dismissed all the opportunities because they don’t “think” they’re their cup of tea- and ended up doing nothing. Think about it.