Hey everyone,
I am currently a freshman at a solid sized state university (around 12,000 students). I am out of state but close to home, and haven’t had any issues with regards to homesickness, but for some reason haven’t settled in yet. It seems like every other freshman around me already has it figured out and are having the time of their lives, and it honestly makes me feel bad. I have a solid group of friends here, but I feel somewhat stuck as if everyone already has there friends and aren’t looking to meet new people (and I want too). It’s honestly felt like this since day 1, it just seemed that everyone had their cliques and friends from the start and I have felt pretty lost. I have made an effort to join clubs and such in hopes of meeting new people but it just hasn’t worked out. Upon visiting my friend at another university (one in which I was strongly considering) I just felt better. Everyone felt more welcoming and together and not as “cliquey” as my current school. I truly just felt comfortable and like I was where I was supposed to be. Heading into this second semester at my current school didn’t have me feeling virtually any excitement, just anxiety, and sadness. I feel like I’m kind of stuck in place at my current school, and am really considering transferring. Any advice?
Finding a club that you’re really interested in might be help with finding friends. In general, it’s hard to make great friendships quickly, even for people at their “dream schools.” It sounds like your concerns are mostly social-related but you should also ask yourself whether the school has the resources/ major you want, having a clear academic reason to transfer is important.
At this point, you might have convinced yourself that transferring to another school is the right decision. It’s a little late in the current application cycle, so I’m not sure whether you’d be able to put in any applications. Keep your grades up, talk to your professors, get involved in some campus activity and consider taking some time off from school to refocus and apply.
Good luck!
First impressions are tough to overcome. Nevertheless, with 12,000 students, you should be able to find friends & groups with whom you feel comfortable.
The answer is that you need a change of environment. The question is whether that can be accomplished by a change of dorm next year or will a transfer to another school be needed.
My suggestion would be to keep making efforts and moving forward, but send in your transfer application so that you can make a choice. Maybe, by the time the decision comes out, you will have found your people and generally feel better about your college experience. If not, then you have the ability to make a choice. Good luck