I’m getting used to being in college and everything and I don’t really think about missing home. Even when I talk to my dad I don’t miss home. But when my parents came for parents’ weekend and I saw my mom and hugged her I suddenly started crying so hard out of nowhere. And I might be fine all day but when my parents video call me and I see my mom I just burst into tears. Or I feel okay, but when I get a call from my mom I just start crying so hard. She called me yesterday and I couldn’t stop crying for 10 minutes. I don’t understand why this happens. I’m a guy and I almost never cry. How do I stop doing this?
Just stop fighting it. You cry because you miss her and the security your feel when you are with her. If you think about it, it is a wonderful thing that you feel so much love for your mother because that means you are loved too. This is the way it is between most mothers and their kids. You have already made a lot of gains in your adjustment to college. You will reach a point when it doesn’t make you cry to talk to your mom most of the time. But sometimes we just cry more when we try not to, rather than just accepting it, going through it and moving on.
@Englishbooknerd , you were concerned about finding like minded people. Is that going better? It’s possible that is part of the problem. This is all part of the process. It’s a blip in your life, but right now it seems huge. It just takes time. It will get better. You will be home for thanksgiving soon. Hang in there.
Is your mom nice and supportive? Then you, like all kids, know she is a “safe space” where you can let go your worries. You are just adjusting and will be fine.
Is your mom saying things that make your feel guilty about going away to college? Then back off the calls.
It sounds like you have a close relationship with your mom. Many people don’t, so be happy that you do. It also sounds like you don’t miss her 24/7, and that is normal and healthy. It’s OK to cry when you talk to your mom face to face. Really.
Same as the comments above, it sounds like your mom is your “safe” place where you can show your feelings. Nothing wrong with that. Hang in there.
Don’t try to stop it. It’s okay to cry. I’m a guy too, 19, and I cry often for a variety of reasons, but I never cry as hard or for as long as when I get to feeling homesick. To be perfectly honest, I am crying my eyes out as type this for that reason. I miss my mom and sister so much. I can’t wait to get back home for Thanksgiving. I want to spend a hour just crying in their arms. I miss my dad too. He died when I was 9, and my grandpa who died this Spring. I plan to go and sit and cry at their graves for a while over Thanksgiving too. Your normal and okay. I promise. Private message me if you ever want to talk and/or cry about anything.