<p>I'm a senior in a large public school. Since the class is so big and our counselors are overworked, they have no chance to get to know students individually. We have a sort of survey thing we're supposed to submit, from which they take our writing and, most likely, fill in the gaps in a recommendation letter form, mass-producing the letters. Basically, we write our own. (I don't know how standard this sort of thing is, so sorry if that's commonplace and I just wasted space.)</p>
<p>My problem is that I was outed to my parents in freshman year, which led to a depression that lasted into my sophomore year. My grades didn't suffer hugely, but they did to some degree, and I wasn't involved in much, and it's going to be a disadvantage at some places I apply. I'd like to put that in the survey (there's a place for 'obstacles'), but there's no way for me to know whether my counselor is homophobic or not. I'm worried that, if she is, she won't be professional enough to just put it in there and leave what I wrote; she might take it out, or, worse, sabotage my letter of recommendation. (I know that's kind of an odd thing to say for someone in a school where the guidance counselors don't have much time or attention to spare, but you'll have to take my word that she may well be paying more attention than would be usual to my letter.)</p>
<p>I need to turn this thing in in the next day or two to meet deadlines, and I'm worrying about this. Would mentioning it on the Common App be enough? Can I say on there that I mentioned this to my counselor, too, but that I'm not sure she would include it? I really don't know what to do.</p>
<p>Where on the Common App would you include this info - in your essay, or in the section for additional information? I would not mention the counselor specifically in any section of the Common App; use your writing to present yourself without bringing the GC into it. You can take the opportunity to say what you want to say about your extenuating circumstances. If your essay topic is on coming out, you could include the information about how it affected your record there. Many students probably write about coming out, because it’s an important process, and I don’t see a problem with that as an essay topic - as long as it’s a really good essay. If another topic would allow you to write a better essay, though, you might want to choose that; in that case, you can explain your individual information in the Additional Info section.</p>
<p>It would be helpful if you and your GC saw your record the same way, of course. Can you make an appointment to discuss this with her specifically? You can say something like, “I wanted to make sure I was clear about why I had a rough time adjusting to high school. What do you think?” She may be very supportive.</p>
<p>It’ll go in the additional information section- I’ve already got the first draft of my essay, and it’s not about coming out. I was originally going to write it about that, but since it wasn’t even my decision to come out, I felt like it didn’t say much about me. It was going to just turn into a sob story. The topic I’m writing about now makes a better essay for me, I think.</p>
<p>My school’s administration has a recent history of homophobia, and I really don’t feel comfortable talking to my guidance counselor about that. I have a hard enough time discussing it in person to people I actually know, as it is. The other thing is that I’m an above-average student at my school, and from comments I’ve heard her make she seems to have really low expectations of students here- I’m not sure she’d regard me as having any sort of roughness on the record, in terms of grades. It’s not like it was a huge drop in my GPA; it was just enough to give me a disadvantage. (The real damage was done in my extracurricular involvement.)</p>
<p>Was your depression diagnosed by a mental health professional? Was the school officially informed of a diagnosis? </p>
<p>In other words, unless your high school was made aware of emotional issues affecting your grades at that time (during freshman and sophomore years), you really can’t have them raise the issue now. </p>
<p>You can mention the extenuating circumstances on the applications. Usually, there is a section such as “additional information”. You can personally write an explanation in this section. Be careful how you word your explanation. Focus on the positives–you’re upward trend, more confident, able to take on challenges, etc.</p>
<p>Do not spend time pointing out the weaknesses in your academic stats. Instead of looking as though you are trying to make up excuses for your lower grades, take responsibility and own those grades. What you want to do is to focus more on the positive—such as, the upward trend from freshman year to senior year. Do not try to excuse your way out of your less than perfect grades. Colleges can see right through this tactic.</p>
<p>opun, I know this is a difficult situation for you and you don’t feel comfortable talking to the GC. Sometimes simple honest directness is the best thing, even though it makes us uncomfortable. If you were to go to this GC and calmly talk about your situation and what you want to convey, it would be a very courageous and empowering thing for you. Many gay people are showing great courage right now in confronting societal attitudes in a peaceful and reasoned way. This is the only way things can change. And things are changing. </p>
<p>My advice is to consider what you wish to say to the GC, and how you wish to say it (hopefully like a calm reasonable adult). Then rehearse in your mind every response from her you can imagine - in the most extreme (i.e. she faints, she calls 911, she calls the local paper, she screams obscenities, she says “so what”, she rips off her clothes, etc.) and think what your reaction would be. </p>
<p>In reality, she will most likely be very reasonable and sane, and not do any of those silly things you worried about, but you will be prepared for anything. Then steel yourself, remember who you are, and march in there. And whatever she says or does, you have to be the bigger person and remain calm and sane.</p>
<p>It sounds like you do not think the GC will write about this in a way that will help you.
You are free to write about anything in the “additional information” section of your own app, and then you can skip dealing with the GC on this issue.</p>