<p>I feel as if I will be living the typical blueprint of what a good highschool graduate should do by society. The blueprints created by social norms say that a good young adult will graduate highschool, go to college, get a degree, etc, etc. And for good reason too-- studies proved that by merely having a degree your predicted average salary goes up by several tens of thousands. However, this system is not my blueprint, this system is not my desire-- and that scares me. It scares me because my parent's joy relies on me going to college and...as shallow as this point sounds, my reputation relies on me going to college. I have been accepted into NC State and have already accepted the offer, signed up for housing, attended orientation, starting my student loans, but all for others. I feel so selfish and realize I sound impulsive, but the more closer the time comes to me starting school the more depressed and drained I feel. Instead, which may be too late, I want to stop and not rush at a pace I am sprinting to keep up with. I want time to think before I invest so much in starting college. I want to go to trade school and learn how to be a mechanic and then perhaps return to college later, but I do not want college now-- which sounds to me like a selfish reason... please, any advice?</p>
<p>It isn’t exactly trade school, but if it isn’t too late, see if you can take a gap year off. A lot of schools now offer that opportunity, and you’re admission to NC State would still be waiting for you when you return. As for getting a college degree, it may not be the most exciting experience, but it will make your life easier further down the road. Good luck!</p>
<p>As a parent, I’d support that decision. There’s at least one thing to consider, though. After a few years, many students lose their math skills. If you change your plans in five years and want to go into a STEM field, you might need a few semesters of remediation before you can begin your major program. If you don’t see that being a problem, don’t worry about it.</p>
<p>I agree that a gap year might do you some good. I have to say that I would think twice about putting it off for a longer time, though. It is so much harder to go when you have more responsibilities later in life. And i assume your parents are paying some of your costs now – that will be tough to do on your own later.</p>
<p>I’d agree with the above. As a society, I feel like that we push people into college instead of exploring their options. IMO, if you are not feeling it, then the opportunity of college won’t be put to the best use. Instead, seriously look into the trade school and talk to your parents about it. Most parents want their kids to attend a 4 year institution, but many are ok with other options as long as you develop some sort of plan. A gap year could do that.</p>
<p>In addition, trade school will provide you with specific SKILLS, which a college may not necessarily do. Likewise, a mechanic is a perfectly reputable job with a good salary, so there is no shame in that</p>
<p>Yes, discuss with your parents deferring your enrollment for a year and doing something else. Reassess a year from now. Let them know that when students do a thoughtful gap year, they enter college with real questions to which they’re seeking answers and are in a good position to use college to that end. It just turns out better. Good luck! </p>
<p>Then don’t go. Be brave and swim against the current.</p>
<p>If you’d rather be a mechanic than go to college, go learn to be a mechanic. With the cost of college these days, you shouldn’t go if it isn’t what you want.</p>
<p>My D2 just graduated from high school, and even though she’s a very intelligent girl, she doesn’t like school and has no desire to go to college at the present time. We’re totally on board with that - if she doesn’t want to go, she probably won’t devote herself to it and do well. I think it’s better that she do something else now and go to college only when she wants to and is willing to do what it takes to succeed there. We’re not disappointed or upset, nor will we be if she chooses a path that doesn’t require college at all. </p>
<p>OP, if you want to be a mechanic, you should probably look at schools that will train you to be one. If that’s not feasible for the fall, then take a gap year. Have you discussed your desired path with your parents? Their joy may not be dependent on you going to college, although they might need a little time to get used to the change in plans. FWIW, my nephew went to school to learn to be a mechanic directly out of high school. It was about an 18 month program and he now has a great job doing what he loves.</p>
<p>My vote is for community college and the auto mechanic program there. It’s tough to get into some of the mechanic’s certificate programs so go check it out now. </p>
<p>Two stories. One quite a while ago, one just beginning.</p>
<p>My BF in high school decided, after 4 years at a private Jesuit prep school, that he hated school, so why should he sign up for more of it? Although he had high grades and was very bright, he just dreaded the thought of more school. So he got a job (at a restaurant), and never looked back. He worked at several restaurants, in various positions, eventually becoming bookkeeper at one. When his boss wanted him to “cook the books,” he quit and looked for a new job. He got one as a pharmacy tech, and has worked there for many years. He is the same age as me, 52, is married (honestly I don’t know whether his spouse has a degree or not), has a home, a job (no kids - their choice), travels frequently, and basically seems to enjoy his life very much. Caveat: not sure how that would work out in today’s job market. Seems many employers use “college degree required” to weed out applicants for even low-skill jobs.</p>
<p>One of my son’s classmates (just graduated HS) will be attending a trade school to learn more about car mechanics (he already knows quite a bit - his senior project was one of the more impressive presentations, I heard - something about fuel injection) and take some business classes, and then he plans to open a garage in an area that really needs one. I think he is definitely in the running for “most likely to succeed” in his HS class.</p>
<p>Go for it!</p>
<p>Do you already know anything about mechanics or being a mechanic? If this is something you are familiar with and know you are good at it and want to do it, I say go for it. College will always be there later on, and forcing yourself to attend when you don’t really want to be there will not do you any real good.</p>
<p>On the other hand, if you’ve never done anything with a screwdriver other than put together IKEA furniture, maybe this whole “I want to be a mechanic” thing is you getting cold feet at the idea of leaving home, having to manage college on your own, etc. </p>
<p>Do you have a plan for what you would major in at NC State, and does the idea of studying that subject interest you? Or do you feel a sense of internal dread at the idea of having to spend four years studying engineering or chemistry or whatever it is? That’s a good way to tell whether college is the right move for you right now.</p>
<p>In the end, it’s your life, not your parents’, and you have to decide what you want to do. </p>
<p>By the way, one of my good college friends just recently, after 20 years in a managerial position at Microsoft, quit in order to go to community college and learn to be an airplane mechanic. She had realized that all day long at her prestigious, high-paying job, she was just waiting for the moment when she could leave work and drive out to the airport to watch the planes taking off and landing, because that was her true love. If it’s in your heart, it will not be denied!</p>
<p>My youngest chose to go to a technical college to be an auto mechanic. Because it is a fully accredited college, he has an associate’s degree. His school also offers a bachelor’s degree in business management and there are a few colleges with agreements with his school where he could easily transfer to a four year program. A good technical college is not cheap. It costs a lot for the proper equipment at the school plus he had to purchase a lot of his own tools for school plus more when he started working full time. He was easily able to get a job. Many schools also offer programs for specific manufacturers. Before he chose his school, we asked our mechanic what schools they recommended. There were some they definitely did not recommend including some of the for profits you see advertised on TV and our local community college. They did like one of the community colleges in another county, but really loved the private school he eventually attended. We also visited schools and compared the equipment available at each. Being a mechanic is also a physicall demanding job. He has to work Saturdays and gets little vacation time at this point.</p>
<p>My 19-year-old son hates the thought of more school, also. He is convinced that his dad and I want him to go to college, but we have told him over and over again that it is HIS decision! It IS our policy that we will support him if he goes to some type of school, but he’s on his own if he decides to take a different path. He told his aunt that he doesn’t care about money; she pointed out that it’s easy to say that when you’re enjoying your parents’ middle class lifestyle on their nickel!</p>
<p>My advice is if you don’t want to go to college right now don’t go. College is fiendishly expensive and not something one should go into with uncertainly. Ask for a deferral and spend the year figuring out how to get where you want to be. I have a good friend and both she and her husband are well educated (engineer and corporate VP) and neither of their kids went to college. Both kids entered trades and now in their mid-to-late twenties, are small business owners (in their trades), have purchased houses and are doing very well and I have no doubt will continue to do well. One of them called the mom crying the day before they were going to drop her off and college and finally admitted she didn’t want to go. Thank heavens she had enough sense to finally come clean with her parents. Smart people can figure out a path in life and that path does not necessarily require college. </p>
<p>My husband dropped out of college as a senior education major. During his student teaching period, he realized he hated all of the school politics. He lived on two different communes, one in Mississippi and the other in Alaska. While building huge log cabins and halls, he got interested in how to size the beams. He took a correspondence class in statics, and eventually got his BS in structural engineering at the age of 30. He went down to UT Austin for grad school, where he met ME! He is over 8 years older than I am, so I am glad he did all that wandering while I went straight through. And now he has so many useful skills. He can even cut down 50 foot tall trees, which comes in handy in Maine! We don’t have to pay someone else to do it (we live in the woods).</p>
<p>OP you sound a lot like my oldest son, except he didn’t come to this realization until after he had pretty much tanked his freshman year. In retrospect perhaps we should have seen the signs—getting him to apply to just 3 colleges was like pulling teeth—but now he confesses he was just following the “expected” path and it is not for him. This is kind of hard for us, as he is extremely bright, always had top grades in school, 5s on APs, an 800 on part of his SAT, etc. He should have done brilliantly in college, right? But he had no passion for it, and thus was not going to do well.</p>
<p>As soon as he got home in May, we told him he had to have a plan. He started looking at tech schools as he says he has a desire to be more “hands on.” I would second what AdvMom says—looks for the right school if you choose this path. Some of the for-profits than run ads on TV do not have good reviews from students or employers. Community college or an accredited technical college is the way to go. We are fortunate to have an excellent college within commuting distance of our home.</p>
<p>Son will start in the fall in a dual Associates degree program with required internship; it will take him 3 years (instead of 4) to earn the 2 degrees, so he will finish in the same time frame as if he had stayed at his previous school. Even better, he is very excited to start! His school also offers the possibility of adding 2 years of business courses to make a Bachelors in Tech Management, if he ever wants that.</p>
<p>I’ll admit it has been an attitude adjustment on my part. There is a stigma against people who work with their hands in some communities, like they are not intelligent or couldn’t do any better. I have been reading a lot about skilled workers, what some of these careers entail, the education that is required. I’ve been listening to a lot of Mike Rowe’s interviews about how America needs skilled workers. My son’s new school boasts a 98% job placement rate for his majors–a lot of 4 year schools can’t claim that. I guess most importantly, I know my son will be happier now, and that’s really all that matters.</p>
<p>OP, for you–maybe a gap year to really investigate what you want to do? Why not take some time this summer to check out these tech programs—for example, when my son took a tour of the engine labs, it cemented for him that this was his path. </p>
<p>People go the other way too. I know someone who was a carpenter for years until he decided to go back to school to study environmental policy. Because he was a more mature student and because he knew exactly why he was there and what his passion was, he was always a top candidate for internships. He was hired immediately upon graduation to work for a local agency’s wildlife management program, and now he’s teaching at a community college and working as an environmental advocate for a nonprofit. College is always there if you want it, and having some years of experience under your belt can help you take better advantage of the opportunities you’re paying for!</p>
<p>Since you " want to go to trade school and learn how to be a mechanic", before you plunge into this dream, did you research the job market for this? I would do the job market research no matter what, college or not. It may be very disspointing to study something and not be able to sustain yourself financialy after. Another question is, did you study possibility of employer’s paying for the next step in your current dream - college? I do not think that ytou will be able to go to college on the mechanic’s income, well, I might be wrong though.<br>
Idea of being hire immediate after college is also very misleading, you need lots and lots of luck for this one. Yes, I was hired immediately after my graduation from the CC in IT / IS department as a computer programmer, it happaned simply because of luck, being at the right place, at the right time. Nobody should rely on that. And while various academic degrees impress various HR departments and mangers (I was told that by several), maturity factor by itlsef does not at all. In fact, somebody who waits a bit longer might face competition from the younger generation of college graduates who will be picked up by companies who are very willing to train young and unexperienced.</p>
<p>Here’s something to think about. Most (all?) of the NC community/technical colleges have courses of study that feed into the UNC system schools. Most (all?) also teach auto mechanics. You could check your local community college and find out what programs there are and whether you could start working both on an AB that would transfer into, say, NC State AND on an auto mechanics degree. You might be able to take college English and math courses at the same time as auto mechanics courses. That way you could see what you like better, then choose whether to go on with auto mechanics or get an AB and transfer into State. You could keep both options open a little longer without losing ground academically.</p>