<p>OKay I've send my personal statement for common app to three different individual who I trust and respects for suggestions/advices. All of them are English professionals. (one of them was the former head of the english department of a respected university in atlantic canada) The thing is, it appears that sometimes one of them would point out minor things (not mechanical but rather phrasing, etc) that need to be enhanced while those same minor things are not viewed as problems by a different individual. That appears to be the least of my dilemma. While my essay seem to be fine/outstanding to two of the three persons, one of them (the former english head) says that the content should be improved, and suggets me to expand if not overhaul my entire essay. the thing is my essay already has 600sh words and i don't think i have enough room to put in some other find points. Personally, i don't see the need to inflate my essay. So should I trust my judgement? Since I might send my essay to another family friend ( : who is the current head of the english department of the university.) next week, should i wait to see what he thinks and then make the final decision? (if i do so, i will have to push back the date i wish to send out my application, and i dont' wanna it to be too late.) Anyway what u guys think?</p>
<p>there is a such thing as too much advice</p>
<p>no matter what you do, make sure that you are proud of your essay, and that it is truly yours.</p>
<p>if you change it to appease someone else, and do not gain admission, you will find yourself blaming them, whether it's their fault or not (which it probably isn't)</p>
<p>Bumpy Bumpy Road</p>
<p>How much are you depending on your essay to help you in the admissions process? If your stats are lacking and you need a really good essay, I would try to improve it. If not, don't change anything.</p>
<p>Always do what you think is best. Your will lose your voice if you change your phrasings, and if 2 out of 3 think the content is ok, then that sounds good to me. I showed my essay to my english teacher, and I ended up only changing the last sentence (I thought it was weak) and one word, which I hadn't realized I had used already.</p>
<p>I think of the essay as an opportunity to tell colleges something about myself that was not asked on the application or short questions.
If your essay is accomplishing that, then keep it.</p>
<p>i usually find that my essays are improved through an 'overhaul'. Usually the problems occur when i listen to certain individuals to fine tune smaller points and inevitably (as one person pointed out) lose my voice. If i were you, and if you have the time. I'd sit that essay down and entirely rewrite it--bearing the advice in mind and utilizing the components and freshness of my original essay.</p>
<p>It's always a risky venture--i've done this so many times to different pieces and the results are sometimes questionable, but give it a shot</p>