<p>Yea, you should have broken his fingers, and his soul. Then you'd rock.</p>
<p>Prothero... I'm not saying I don't understand why he hit the guy. I might have done so myself... hard to know since I wasn't there experiencing the shock and anger.</p>
<p>I AM saying that in the calm moment NOW, discussing this, I am looking for remorse and resolve to behave differently in the future. He could have said - "I'm sorry I hit the guy. My emotions got the best of me. I hope next time this experience will have taught me not to react to violence with violence."</p>
<p>I don't see that at all from the OP. I believe he just doesn't get it.</p>
<p>I stated before "These emotions overpowered me, and I wasn't able to make clear, rational thoughts." I also said that I should have calmed beforehand. Of course hitting him back is wrong. Reacting with violence will always be a big mistake. I really wish that I did not have done it. But I did. It was a reaction. I will not be sorry for a reaction that was fueled by sudden intense emotions. Obviously, I will feel sorrow and remorse if I hurt someone who did not deserve it at all. But this guy really had something coming to him by purposely provoking me like that. If he threw it at me accidentally, and I still hurt him back, then I wouldn't be able to live with myself, but this was not the case. Why do I have to feel sorry for hurting him back? I'm definitely sorry for breaking his nose - I really did not think that would happen, and obviously a broken nose is far worse than a hard throw to the face that did not leave a good mark, but I'm not sorry for actually hurting him. You guys are the ones who don't seem to get it. Stop thinking that I'm a heartless jerk.</p>
<p>Maybe I didn't make this clear enough before: I'm DEFINITELY sorry for the broken nose, but NOT sorry for actually hurting him. Is that clear enough, now?</p>
<p>the last post is what will do you no good with trying to plead your case, if indeed the colleges don't like the suspension.</p>
<p>it doesn't matter what we think, does it? it is what the people that have your destiny think that matters, and with a 5 day suspension and no contact allowed for those 5 days, those are the people that need to see how you feel about what you did</p>
<p>If you dont' think you did anything wrong, well....</p>
<p>Your explanation would only make you look worse. Hitting someone gives the impression you have a problem with anger; explaining it as 'being provoked' suggests also that you are ALSO not mature enough to take responsibility for your actions. </p>
<p>Everyone who has ever engaged in violence offers up this justification: it reads like blaming the victim.</p>
<p>I should add, how do you think your explanation would set you apart from all the other people who break noses or engage in violence? Like somehow you are different from the guy who breaks a nose for sport? Or 'cold-bloodiedly"? 99% of violent acts are the result of "losing it" after a triggering event.</p>
<p>Get this through your thick skull, cgm: What I did was absolutely wrong. I know hitting him was a terrible mistake. I feel sorry for the broken nose, but not sorry for actually hurting him in return. He was practically begging to be hit in return. I know violence is not the answer, but I did not think this when I was in the heat of the moment. I know I should have calmed down before making that foolish mistake. </p>
<p>And I'm obviously not going to mention that I don't feel remorse for actually hitting the guy, looking at the way you people are reacting. But know this: I feel a lot of sorrow for breaking the guy's nose. I know he did not deserve something like that.</p>
<p>And you guys stop telling me how I should feel. There is no way I could change how I feel. Everybody is different. You have your views and I have mine. And I obviously was not mature enough to even calm down before acting. I'm not some fifty year old man who learned all about life's mistakes. This is what we do, we LEARN from our mistakes as we grow older.</p>
<p>Look, this is the first time a situation like this has ever happened to me. I did not react very well to it because it was the FIRST TIME. I was not born perfect.</p>
<p>Mayo, I am a Dad, and in my opinion, he deserved it. Not a broken nose, but maybe a good whack on the head. But, that doesn't mean your action is justified. Understandable yes, but not justified. At the end of the day his action is perceived as horseplay and you responded with an assault. Unless it's self-defense, violence is considered wrong in the eyes of law and in many peoples' opinion as you can see from the responses of the *moms. As an adult you have to learn to take consequences of your actions.
Go talk to your school officials with your parents.</p>
<p>I believe I used the word "justifiable" wrongly. I was really thinking "understandable."</p>
<p>hpg90 - "I blame all the parents who have nothing better to do than to live on this site.....it's understandable that kids, who after all are the ones that are actually in the process of going to college, may be on here obsessively, but the adults.....especially those with the sanctimonious epistles.....get a life. I am sure that not one of these folks has a spotless life. I hope that they receive more sympathy, empathy and forgiveness than they dole out.
OP, I hope it works out for you."</p>
<p>I agree completely! I went on this site to find out some dates and stuff because my school is incredibly unhelpful and was shocked by all of the parents talking about "my S/D" as if they were the ones applying!</p>
<p>I am a senior and the only involvement that my parents had was coming with me on a visit to 4 colleges in easter of Junior year, and my Dad handing over the credit card to pay application fees. No one read my essays and application before it was sent (my sister read my personal essay afterwards because she was interested). </p>
<p>StrawberryMayo did not ask to get a barrage of parental admonision- I'm sure he got that enough from his own parents and teachers- he just asked "Will my suspension hurt my chances of getting in?"</p>
<p>As for my answer (sorry for the rant), I do not think it will hurt your chances if the midyear report does not mention it. I believe that acceptances are given with the only condition being graduating high school and continuing your grade trend to the end of the year.</p>
<p>"StrawberryMayo did not ask to get a barrage of parental admonision- I'm sure he got that enough from his own parents and teachers- he just asked "Will my suspension hurt my chances of getting in?""</p>
<p>To directly answer your question: Yes, your suspension is likely to hurt your chances of acceptances if the colleges learn about it. College admissions officers are very much like the parents here who have expressed concerns about your reaction to the situation with the dodgeball. Given the widely publicized incidents involving violence that have occurred on college campuses, administrators would be wary of admitting someone who may have an impulse control problem. The administrators also may fear that the college would get sued should they admit a student with a history of violence who then does something violent on the campus. The horrible situation that occurred last year at Virginia Tech probably has caused admissions officers to take a more cautious stance on things like this, as has the fact that there are more college applicants this year than in any other time in U.S. history.</p>
<p>Early in the thread he was getting good advice on how to handle the admissions issue from posters (including parents). They suggested he check with his GC about what would be reported to schools and follow up with a letter to schools if colleges were informed. </p>
<p>Then he asked, "I want to know, would any of you guys have done the same thing?" He did, in fact, ask for judgments on his actions. He seems upset that he didn't receive universal support but that's how it goes sometimes.</p>
<p>I'm pretty sure his previous acceptances won't be lost...seeing the dissension on this site has shown that people will have different views on this and a college won't rescind somebody unless they are 100% positively sure. It may, however, hurt your chances at future acceptances depending on how competitive you are as a student. Furthermore, if you have to write a letter to explain this, don't say your actions were justifiable. Even though I agree with you to an extent as well, it wouldn't do well for colleges to think that now, as a calm individual, you can still somewhat justify your action. Apologize fully and thoroughly and admit that everything you did was wrong. Even if you don't believe it.</p>
<p>NSM- it's a pretty big leap from throwing a punch after being hit in the face by a ball to Virginia Tech.<br>
This kid has consequences. I don't think anyone has said he did not deserve the suspension. The other kid should have a suspension, too.
The issue is whether this will hurt admissions. If not handled correctly, it could. If handled correctly, there is little chance, in my mind, that it will have any impact on admissions already received or still to come. This is not a gang fight, coming to school with a weapon or a pattern of conduct.<br>
In my time on CC, I have seen several other instances where a few of the parents posting so vehemently on this thread have made quantum leaps and assumptions that are not warranted. Just my opinion, of course.....:)</p>
<p>"breaking a kid's nose"</p>
<p>you better tell us how this all went down...</p>
<p>If you're interested in reading what actual adcoms think about suspension and discipline issues here's a link. (In general they seem to regard academic dishonesty as the worst offense. One says, "We don't like wasting our time reading about students playing hooky, having cigarettes in the school parking lot, etc. Our application, for example, asks for information on disciplinary action that was as a result of academic dishonesty or behavior that harmed or had the potential to harm others.")
<a href="http://www.collegeconfidential.com/experts/index.htm%5B/url%5D">http://www.collegeconfidential.com/experts/index.htm</a></p>
<p>In the link that MD_Mom provided, I thought that this comment from the Smith College representative particularly related to the kind of situation the OP describes:</p>
<p>"The purpose of these questions is to promote a safe campus environment and an academic community of integrity. In most cases, a senior admissions person or a campus-wide committee will make the deny decision based solely on conduct/crime. We absolutely look at each situation individually, and assault is treated differently than skipping school. "</p>
<p>And these comments on the same link by a Middlebury College representative also is applicable to the OP's situation:</p>
<p>"Other scenarios shed light on more recent lapses and do bear careful scrutiny by the admissions committee; however, hearing in your own words what happened and what lessons you assimilated can assure a committee that great kids can, and do, sometimes make bad choices. More often than not, what influences a committee decision is not what a student did but how she handles it both at the time of the incident and throughout the admissions process. It is impossible to generalize and say that some types of misbehavior are more forgivable than others. Each case is assessed on its own merits, in the context of what is said about the applicant within the folder and, more importantly, what the applicant has to say for himself.</p>
<p>The same can be said of situations that arise after a student submits an application for admission. We have all heard tales of the senior class trip that ends with students being suspended. In these scenarios the students in question did answer honestly the application question – they had never been dismissed or suspended. It is still incumbent upon you to be forthright after filing your application, particularly if you applied and were admitted under a college’s early decision program. Letters of admission are often contingent upon “successful completion of the senior year” and you should not assume that that refers only to your academics. If you are disciplined after submitting your application, or even after being admitted, you should inform the colleges involved.</p>
<p>No student wants to add to her application information that is unflattering, highlights a lapse in judgment or jeopardizes her admission; however, I can assure you that a well crafted explanation of the circumstances leading to disciplinary action will serve you far better than hoping the situation will go unnoticed....."</p>
<p>citygirlsmom </p>
<p>if the admissions officers are ADULTS like you i would hope they have a better grasp on the a situation like this</p>
<p>secondly i cant speak for the OP but if it is filled with ADULTS like you i would have to question why i would want to attend that school</p>