<p>I’ve found that social experiences are far more important than experiences with parents when it comes to lessons of restraint, reciprocality, responsibility, and such. (as long as the child doesn’t have schizoid or antisocial personality disorder). I’ve been conditioned to act somewhat machiavellian towards my parents (but social experiences are the types of experiences that make me feel bad about it). </p>
<p>[and also experiences where you’re not valued solely based on your intelligence\quirkiness\etc. hard to say. children may still learn lessons when their parents let them get away with everything [as long as their social environment doesn’t allow them to get away with everything].</p>
<p>[but what if their school and peers let them get away with everything ALONG WITH THAT? Then that could be problematic]</p>
<p>But there are indirect ways to influence a child. My mom used to buy me educational materials and she didn’t force me to read them - but the mere availability of such materials did influence me in taking steps towards an academic direction. The problem is that parents can control information flow to children and so some parents could effectively raise children without any negative experiences (if they control information flow in such a way that only “desired” information reaches the children, and condition the children to enjoy activities the child would otherwise not enjoy [that’s difficult to do now and probably for good reason, but it might be possible in the future =/]). it’s kind of like feeding “happy drugs” to children.</p>