Note that young adult children staying with parents could have implications for mobility. If they cannot move somewhere else (i.e. limited geographic mobility) because they cannot afford it*, then they may not be able to move to places with better job opportunities (i.e. limited employment mobility, which in turn limits economic mobility).
*Not every job provides relocation benefits, and some people historically moved to job-rich areas before finding jobs. So many have to pay the relocation costs up front. But not being able to afford them can limit the ability to move where the jobs are.
I hear this a lot, UCB. And for a middle class kid (not talking about someone from an impoverished family, where if the adult child moves away, the electric bill wonāt get paid) this is largely a myth.
Many jobs are now using online/zoom interviews-- even for the final round. You can be 3, 30 or 3000 miles away and still get an offer, without ever having met your boss. A recent college grad does NOT need the white glove moving package with the Steinway piano and valuable antiques wrapped and carried on the truck. What does the kid own- a futon and a few suitcases with books and towels?
Back in ancient times (the mid 2000ās, before Zoom and all the rest of that) one of my kids landed a job (phone interviews all the way), bought a train ticket, had a one night reservation at a cruddy motel, and relocated with a suitcase and an alarm clock. We promised to pack up everything else once there was a permanent address (a reasonably cruddy apartment but it was a step up from the motel). I hear from parents all the time, āHow could he move to Atlanta, he doesnāt know anyone?ā or āSheās been told that there are fantastic finance jobs in Charlotte, but how is she supposed to find an apartment in a city sheās never visited before?ā
In an age where kids check online reviews before buying a bottle of shampoo, itās just not that difficult for a young, single person with a phone and a credit card (even if only for emergencies) to relocate for a job. Or the promise of a job.
Covid- yes. The last 15 months have put a damper on mobility. But for the future? Cāmon.
Relocation costs? Are we shipping grandmaās Limoge, service for 18, or getting an apartmentās full of stuff off Craigslist/Amazon/Ikea???
Perhaps largely a myth for the forum middle class that gripes about not getting financial aid to send their kids to college, but when 39% (in 2018) did not have $400 to spare ( The Fed - Dealing with Unexpected Expenses ), that suggests that many families and their 18-29 year old adult children may have difficulty affording even minimalist relocation expenses to move to a place where jobs are more available.
I thought the most commonly cited issue was about finding money for the deposit and first monthās rent so you have somewhere to live? Is it common to ask employers for an advance on the first monthās paycheck, assuming thereās no signing bonus?
I think @twoin18 is correct. My daughter just moved this past January (within the same city less than a mile away). She has stuff (unlike many of the kids we are talking about) and so there was a not insignificant movers bill. However, that paled in comparison to the 1st month, last month security fee, and broker fee costs for the new apartment.
I think many of these kids move as sublets or fill empty rooms with a group of other young adults and donāt necessarily have these costs to worry about.
DS prioritized living close to family when he accepted a new position and we are thrilled that he and his wife and toddler will be living with us, at least temporarily. They have a home to sell in the community where they currently live, which should be no problem. However, finding a home to purchase here is next to impossible. They feel that if they are going to have to make an offer 10% over the list price which is already high, it should be something they actually want to live in!
Boston Globe had an article on home prices today. Astronomical. Low supply, high demand. COVID is certainly a factor. Question is whether this is a bubble that will pop, whether there will be a natural correction, or whether prices will stay up and continue to rise. I would also be hesitant to buy right now.
Also, rentals outside the city can be hard to find, so living with parents may even be the only good option.
My D moved back in after she graduated. Her job is about 30 minutes away but in a very lackluster area and she didnāt want to live alone or with a stranger in that area.
Iāve loved having her home and sheās saved a large amount of money which sheāll be able to use towards a down payment, retirement etcā¦ The next step in her career path will probably entail quite a bit of travel so Iām enjoying this time with her.
My youngest D has been home since last March when her uni closed and sheās on a gap year now. My S is graduating next week and heāll live at home and commute to work for at least a year until his gf graduates. Heās looking forward to saving lots of his salary as well.
I havenāt downsized, not sure I ever will. I love having room for all my kids and someday hopefully grandkids too.
I think people ought to do whatever works for them.
Unlike most on this thread, my two daughters have never lived at home since high school graduation (not even for a summer during college). As well, when they obtained their final degree (I did pay for their education), they were expected to support themselves. They have supported themselves since their graduation day (for one of my daughters, that was age 20) in expensive cities. They have had no parental financial assistance. Now, of course, if my kids were struggling to survive and needed a place to stay, they would be totally welcome, but I just cannot imagine either of them ever considering moving home.
My kids live in Silicon Valley. My son has never been with me since college. As they are purchasing a house now, it is the first time son has asked for a loan. Prices are SO high. I wish they could have found a house with a bedroom on the first floor, but anything like that was beyond their budget. I would hate ever being a burden. It is a hard world for many of our grown children who can only live in a few places for their work, to be able to afford a house rather than to keep paying exorbitant rents.
Assuming you find a roommate situation without a broker fee in NYC, I canāt imagine a situation where it would cost less then $1500-2000 up front to relocate here unless you were staying with someone you know. For a 500 sqft apartment in a cheaper neighborhood, my broker fee, first month rent, and deposit were $6250. A lot of second-hand options for furniture are also out of the question because of bed bugs/cockroaches, so even minimalist furnishings could easily cost another $500-1000. Iām in my early 30s and I donāt think the majority of my friends would be able to get their hands on $2000 without help from family.
Both of my daughters, early 30s, married, own their apartments in Manhattan. They are small apartments. No parental help in purchasing. One even had to put down 30% because she is a performing artist and the conditions for her to buy an apartment were stricter.
One lives in the West Village and one on the Upper West Side.
Both of my kids moved out as soon as they could. But we live very close to each other that we get together a lot.
I think itās great your kids are able to stay with you during this time. Enjoy it while you can.
But we live very close to each other that we get together a lot.