Hi! I’m an international student and I just started at a small art school (around 2,000 in total in the entire student body). So far, I love my classes, I love the city i’m in, but the only thing bothering me is the fact that I’ve been having trouble making friends.
It’s now been around 3 weeks into the semester, and it seems to me that so many people who are in their first year too already have go-to people they can eat lunch with or even make plans for the weekend with, while I still don’t. I’ve talked to some really nice people and all at my classes, but it’s either they all have little exclusive groups of friends already or have better things to do after class ends, or we just never speak again after we do. I don’t dorm (i’m staying with some relatives who live in the same city as my school) so i don’t have a roommate or dorm mates to socialize with. It really gets so lonely for me, especially since I come from somewhere else and I’m so far away from the friends i’m used to. I had so many different groups of friends in high school – I never had any problem meeting new people or making any friends back home. It was easy for me because I was in the “popular” crowd, and it was so easy for me to socialize with all kinds of people at my high school, I had friends in almost every grade or every club/group. In short, I was never alone. Most of my friends either went to the same University back home or still hang out every weekend while i’m gone. I have a few other friends who went abroad to Europe or Asia for University, but they don’t seem to be having a hard time at all. They socialize quite often and even go clubbing or exploring on weekends with their new friends.
I’ve read many other forums and articles saying that international students usually band together – this isn’t the case, because most of the other international students are Chinese or Hispanic and they band together because they all speak the same language, but I am the only one from my country. I’m starting to feel like I have no hope.
Is it possible that i’ll go through University without having any friends at all? Is it normal to be having lunch alone? Any advice on learning how to be alone? Looking for advice or reassurance, please 
i’d appreciate it so much!
http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/college-life/1921844-ditching-a-friend-group-and-going-it-alone.html#latest
Have a look at the link above. It isn’t quite the same as your situation, but there are many good ideas about meeting people and that it’s very normal to not have friends yet. There are also a lot of threads in this forum about similar topics. Give it time, you will have friends.
I think for you and people like you, there is an expectation that you will instantly be surrounded by a lot of new freinds, but it isn’t like that in reality. Many people settle for the superficiality of these early friendships, but I think for people who are more sensitive it is harder to just accept the supeficiality becasue you have deeper friendships. Please make an appointment with the counselors at your school, if for no other reason to confirm that your feelings are normal and common.
Same! I’m an International Student too, from Europe. I like Canada but I kind of just came here for my boyfriend, I miss my family and old friends. There are so my many International Students here and they’re almost all Asian and totally live together in their own world. I’m from Switzerland so I have nothing in common with them.
I’m in my second year now and I just ignore the Asian students now and finally made friends with Canadian students. It took me almost one year. Im first year I made friends only with German exchange students who left. Just don’t focus on other International Students but on the Americans or Canadians. And try to join clubs even if they don’t interest you because it’s a great way to make at least one new good friend. Clubs give you something to do in your free time so you have less time to focus on loneliness or even homesickness and they are perfect for meeting new people and potential friends. It’s not positive for making friends that you don’t live on campus because it’s actually a lot easier to make friends this way but maybe you can choose to move into the student residence next year/semester? It could also help you to at least feel less alone because there are always people around. I know it helped me.
In my experience making friends at University can be a challenge, especially as an International Student but please don’t give up already because it takes time and eventually you’ll make some good friends I’m sure. Good luck!
Small world! I’m in Vancouver too. Thanks for the advice. A week later and I’m feeling much better & have come to understand that it’ll take time. Thank you!