Interracial dating

Pre-College Issues High School Life
61

<p>Kim, it was because he was african.</p>

<p>
[quote]
They aren't hurting anyone? Physcially: what about STDs? AIDS? Is it okay to be slut, even if you have gnorrhea? Or AIDS? A person might enjoy being with sluts because they'll get satisfied physically. But what if the "slut" gives them a disease? Or what if someone unwillingly becomes pregnant? Is it still justified? Is it still "not wrong"?</p>

<p>Are you insinuating that no harm will come to anyone, even if they have loose sexual habits? That's ridiculous. I thought everyone took a sex ed class, like, in the fifth grade. Or do they skip those where you live?</p>

<p>Emotionally: many will hurt themselves. Having sex with anyone for the sake of having sex (i.e., being a slut) displays the respect one has for himself or herself (i.e., not much).</p>

<p>"You're playing the right-winged card, my friend."</p>

<p>No, I don't think so. Most of my friends are fierce Democrats/liberals-- pro-abortion, anti-death-penalty, anti-war, anti-Bush etc-- but they also recognize the danger and crudeness and wrongness of disrespecting women and condoning "slut" behavior.</p>

<p>You obviously don't.

[/quote]

No, when those things happen, they happen. Usually as a result of not using condoms or proper precaution. But of course, giving someone an STD is not usually intended. I'm not saying you're safe from all harm, but sex is a part of some people's lives. That's little like saying you shouldn't cross the street to go to school because if you don't look both ways you might get hit by a car. If they enjoy having sex and they are protecting themselves, why stop them? Just because you LIKE SEX doesn't mean you have no respect for yourself. It just means you like to have sex. Is enjoying sex supposed to be unnatural?</p>

<p>I do know the dangers of having sex. I don't have the time, money or desire to go out and have sex with anyone. I choose not to. If two consenting parties decide to have sex, oral sex, anal sex, make out, hump, etc why should they decide that its immoral, especially if they haven't before?</p>

<p>
[quote]
Right. So... they call OTHER women "*****es" and "ho"s, so that makes it okay. Just as long as YOU aren't the one being directly disrespected, foul language and disrespect toward OTHER women is justified. I suppose you are not a feminist.</p>

<p>That's funny. You called yourself a liberal, after all. I just guess the respect of women is not on your personal agenda, then.</p>

<p>"And there are beautiful songs about sex. Just because raps are not melodious doesn't make it bad. Its still sex."</p>

<p>Melody has nothing to do with it. I don't care what raps sound like. It is the emotional part of sex that is important. The problem that many have with rap is that it treats sex with no emotional ties. Women are there to physically service a man, and that's it. The man seems to not care less what the woman feels emotionally. They're treated like any other object used to satisfy a specific purpose, and then metaphorically just thrown away once they've been satisfactorially "used." Great.</p>

<p>"Its still sex. No matter what words you use"</p>

<p>Move beyond the physical. Physically, it's sex. But sex usually has emotional ties. The words you use ARE important, when discussing the emotional feelings the couple has towards each other. Sex is sex physically. But isn't it sad to think that that's all it is?

[/quote]

No, I am not a feminist. Anyway, as you know not every woman is a hoe. In these songs they seem to be talking about the women they are having sex with. IF women want to start calling men hoes or be more public about calling them *******s, that is fine by me.</p>

<p>People who frequently have sex with different partners obviously do not care about the oh so important emotional part of sex. They are aroused and that's all they care about. Sex doesn't have to be emotional. Perhaps subconciously it is, but apparently they don't mind or care.</p>

<p>Just making sure, but you do know there are plenty of popular rap songs about having sex with one woman. Having sex to please the woman. Showing appreciation for the woman, etc. We're not just going on the "I love money, cars, clothes and hoes" thing.</p>

62

<p>I'm going to try and give a different perspective on stereotyping here, based on my personal experience: I tend to be quiet and reserved, so I leave people with plenty of room to come up with their own opinions about me. The most commom is the whole bookworm, smart-girl routine, but the gamut has been run from stuck up and conceited to my friend who i have known for four years thinking i am against rock music just because i am black.<br>
making generalizations is human nature, but there is a reason we have brains.</p>

<p>As to the original topic: I believe interracial dating is absolutely fine. The only problems are the ones that the couples themselves may have, e.g. cheating, money, crazy in-laws, etc.</p>

63

<p>Great post. This is a nice thread.</p>

64

<p>What? Even if you are the same race you'll be cheating, money, etc! Race has nothing to do with that. THe onnly problems is (I agree with the angry in-laws thing) culture and people who want their race to be kept pure.</p>

65

<p>"Yeah I swear people think Asians only eat rice. In addition, they deal with the "math and science" stereotype"</p>

<p>math and science? :( I'm gonna make myself a shirt that says: "NO, I dont major in engineering, math or science"</p>

66

<p>well, i completely fit into the asian stereotype, lol! I'm math/science oriented, i eat a lot of rice [and noodles], but you can't beat a supreme pizza from Papa Johns, i play piano like crazy, etc. The few things that take me out of the stereotype would be my height (6' 0"), athletic ability (stereotypically, asians are physically weak at my school), and interracial dating (again, at my school, the asian stereotype is that asian guys only date asian girls, but i've only dated white girls in my entire life).</p>

67

<p>wait, i just contradicted myself by saying i was completely in the stereotype and then listing things that took me out of it, whoops!</p>

68

<p>untilted: if you made that shirt, i would be one of the firsts to purchase it! i was talking to my cousin and some of his friends (who are Indian or Chinese) and they're talking about how they majored in engineering/electrical engineering (my cousin)/biology/biochem, etc. You get the drift. I tell them that those are such the Asian majors, so my cuz asks, so what are you gonna major in? I respond,"Not any of those, definitely!" so, yea, theres definitely a stereotype about how all Asians excel in math and science. </p>

<p>i personally cant stand math (tho i am on an accelerated math pace...ill be taking precal in 10th grade). but science, i was mediocre, i got good grades only because my teacher was too easy on us. </p>

<p>as to the rice thing, that could be said to be true. i eat rice like 5 days out of the week (of course, along with something else, of course). </p>

<p>as for out of the stereotype, for me, im pretty tall for an asian girl (5'8"), im in things such as drama and cross country, and im much louder and more outgoing than the [stereo]typical asian girl who is supposed to be shy and stuff.</p>

69

<p>The problem with stereotypes is that they evolve from minor truths. Even when one says stereotypes are false, there remains some truth in them which will keep feeding public perception. </p>

<p>I'll use Asians as an example (no offense). One of their stereotypes is that they are math/science orientated and really smart. I don't think these characteristics apply to all Asians, but there is some truth to the stereotype. Asians are numerous in top colleges. I've heard that they make up 50% of student body in UC-Berkley or UCLA (?). As mentioned earlier, many major in math/science.</p>

70

<p>It's not O.k. to call anyine a bad name.</p>

71

<p>A lot of Asians-- Indians included-- may "suffer" from like-minded, recent immigrant parents. "Like-minded" as in:</p>

<ol>
<li>They want-- and will certainly push and pressure-- their kid to become a doctor/scientist etc</li>
<li>The sciences/math are considered weightier and more practical than liberal arts subjects like history or English</li>
</ol>

<p>That's why you see a lot of Asians majoring and focusing on medicine, or science, or computer science, and what seems like less focusing on history, or art majors etc. It's cultural. It makes a lot of sense, too. </p>

<p>If you're a recent immigrant in general, you probably are at least somewhat adverse to having your kids grow up to do sculptures and paint all the time instead of gaming for a more practical, high-paying, very respectful job-- a doctor, for instance. An engineer. </p>

<p>It has to with being financially secure of all things, which is difficult for most immigrants. Parents don't cross the Pacific, leaving everything they know behind, for their American born and/or American-raised kid to become some art history major. The money and the prestige and obviously the practicality is to be found in the maths/sciences-- hence the proliference of Asians in those fields.</p>

<p>I'm not saying all Asians are like that, or that all Asian immigrants in particular are like that. It's just very common, though. And many recent immigrants-- be they from Africa or India or Egypt or Poland-- think that way.</p>

72

<p>Do other culture groups pressure their children to do certain things?</p>

73

<p>yes, thats true. and actually, those feelings stay for a while. even parents who came as immigrants themselves and have kids who are first-generation Asian-Americans want them to major in something like medicine or technology. That's why you hear so many stories out there of Asians who are afraid to major in something or do something they like because they're afraid of what their parents will think.</p>

74

<p>Yeah!!! I know I feel pressured. I'm also Nigerian.....but it's more that my parents just want me to be successful in life and do well. Yeah they talk to us often about school work and the importance of getting a good education. But I think a lot of cultures are like that too.</p>

75

<p>My mothher doesn't pressure me she just constantly reminds me that I will go to college no matter what.</p>

76

<p>I just skimmed this thread and thought it was very interesting - the topics's come up before, but has always turned extremely nasty (so far, it looks like this has't been TOO bad). </p>

<p>Anyway, I just thought I'd comment that in my family, interracial dating isn't only accepted, it's the norm. My mother is half black/half Japanese. My father is Polish. My cousins are also "tri-racial" and we have collectively dated nearly every culture possibly - one is engaged to an upper class white man, another is dating a black guy, and I went to prom with a Korean. </p>

<p>Out of eight interracial marriages in my mother's immediate family,only one has divorced. We have no family feuds, every one gets along, and we eat our sushi right next to the kielbasa and black eyed peas.</p>

<p>Interracial dating does NOT have to be a major issue.</p>

77

<p>trasi86 I'm glad to see things are working out for your family</p>

78

<p>I think pressure exists from all cultures. I'm Afro-Carribean and I will not dare tell my parents if I want to major in Art History, Film Studies, or English. Science/tech degrees are more practical and valuable according to them. Luckily, I'm more math/science orientated anyways;)(although I'm fond of English). </p>

<p>And, yes, interracial dating SHOULD not be a problem. You can keep your race pure through education. I believe that race (which implies species.) does not exist, but culture/ethnicity does. If one educates their children about their culture, then one does not have to marry within their ethnicity to preserve their culture.</p>

79

<p>Tell em bout it pj</p>

80

<p>And another thing: </p>

<p>Some of you say that people marry within their culture to keep "their race pure." But, children don't always maintain the traditions of their family. I know teens who've competely neglected their culture even though their "pure." They can't speak or understand the language of their culture. They don't eat the ethnic dishes. Some (who are insecure and have low self-esteems) go so far as to deny their ethnicities and distance themselves from those who even remotely share their ethnicities. I've seen people do that, especially in my culture unfortunately. It's pathetic and makes the rest of us who embrace our cultures look bad.</p>