I am a senior in high school, and I am seriously contemplating whether I should go to a college or not.
I’ve never been an academic student and it is very evident in my GPA which falls below 3.0.
Although I applied to few schools, none of them appeals to me and I doubt I am going to get in anyway.
My parents have high hopes for me because they don’t realize how idle and stupid I am.
They are always busy,(I am not blaming them at all for anything) and I never tell them anything regarding my grades.
They do not know I am failing classes and that I have absolutely no motivation to do better.
No major interests me and I do not have the faintest idea of what I want to become.
I do not have a hobby or an interest. My favorite activity is to sleep.
My teacher bluntly told me that I am just going to waste my parent’s money if I go into college like this, and I think he is right.
I am going to talk to my counselor about it and then talk to my parents although I know they are going to be immensely disappointed in me.
If I do really take a year off, what should I do instead?
What is an alternative that you suggest?
I want to find a passion. I want to be happy doing something.
I don’t know what to do with my life.
If you’re looking for possible gap year ideas, might I recommend working in a national park after senior year of high school? I worked in Yellowstone from May to October last year and found it an incredibly valuable experience. Not only did I get to work in one of the most beautiful places on Earth, but I also got to work with people from all over the world. I lived in employee dorms with people my own age, met some great and some terrible people, and now brag that I lived on top of a supervolcano.
When I returned to school, I was much more motivated and far more appreciative of the opportunities present in college. If you’d like more information about working in such an environment, feel free to PM me.
You might also want to look into Americorps, the military, moving to a place you find interesting and taking a job there, taking on an apprenticeship, etc.
I would recommend finding a job. Either you’ll find something you like or you’ll find you need a degree to do something you like.
Colleges will expect you to explain what you did during your gap year. It could be a great essay topic.
I can’t believe that I am saying this…but make an appointment with your GP/pediatrician. A 17/18 year old who has no interests, sees themselves as idle and stupid, only wants to sleep, is failing and doesn’t care, has no motivation, may have something else going on. Could be physical, could be depression, could be a few things. Worth finding out.
Of course, you can set the appointment up to fail if you don’t give your Dr the full picture of just how you are feeling and what you are doing. If you think you might clam up, print out this thread and just give it to the Dr.
First, not everyone does have a true passion or a clear idea of what they want to become when they are 17-18. Some never find a “passion” and go to school to get a good job that can allow them to lead a happy life. Don’t box yourself in to feeling you need to find that one true passion before you move ahead in life.
And I do agree that if all you want to do is sleep, you are failing a class, and you don’t see a future for yourself then you may want to talk things out with a counselor/therapist.
But to answer your question if you take a gap year and do something productive that will be no issue for colleges. That can be work, volunteering , a gap year program etc. For some a gap year can be a very good idea. Sleeping in every day is not productive. But it will be harder to explain your failing grade to colleges so get motivated and get through that class.
Take a look at The Gap Year Advantage by Haigler and Nelson. Great resource for people considering a gap year. It will also help you to talk to your parents if you have a plan for after high school, even if it doesn’t include college.
A few other places to look at for Gap Year - City Year, Student Conservation Corp, and Americorp (already mentioned).
Elsewhere, people have suggested the military. I hesitate to recommend that route as it’s not something you can change your mind about once you’ve joined up, but it may be something you’d want to consider.
Another option is to work part time and take a class or two at community college in something that you think sounds interesting. Some people are not meant to be full-time students, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t smart or can’t find interesting and meaningful work. It just means that they are going to have to leave the ‘beaten track’ in order to find their way. No shame in that at all.
Lastly, collegemom3717 is on the right track - you need to set up an appt with a doc and lay this out for him/her just as you did here. Lots of students who struggle in school and feel ‘stupid’ discover an undiagnosed learning disability - or have undiagnosed depression or other health issues.
And remember, your parents’ disappointment in you - if that’s even real - is minor compared to how they will feel if you don’t share your struggles with them sooner rather than later. They are not too busy, ever, to hear that you need their guidance and help. And even if, worse case scenario, they are too disappointed to be constructive right away, know that the fundamental challenge of parenting everywhere is to learn to love the child you get, not the child you hoped for or dreamed up.
@collegemom3717 @happy1 @N’s Mom @whenhen
Thank you for all your comments and advices!
I would like to assuage your concern and whatever worry my angst post caused you by saying that
I am not suffering from depression or at least not from a degree that is problematic.
I laugh a lot, smile a lot and they are not forced at all 
I am usually a rather happy girl.
I don’t think I have learning disability or any health issue either, but I guess I can’t be absolutely positive without seeing a doctor. Unfortunately, I don’t have a insurance so it will be awhile before I see one though.
My immigrant parents are more than I could wish for and I’ve mentioned the idea of gap year to them recently.
My mom said I have to propose a detailed, plausible plan for her to consider it seriously.
So I’ve searched up few gap year ideas, but my family isn’t doing well financially (receiving medicaid) and I was wondering if anyone could suggest an affordable program? I’d appreciate it a lot.
Thank you again!
I would highly recommend taking a gap year.
Taking a gap year adds tremendous perspective to your college experience. You learn not to take anything too seriously as you understand that life goes on and new opportunities are always awaiting at the next corner. In contrast, I seen many students whose identity is too tied to their institution-high school and college-and can’t see beyond that.
Another benefit that I did not know at the time. Is to make sure you are a right fit for your school. This is the most important factor in choosing a college. Pick two or three disciplines that you are passionate about and truly start asking yourself questions about them. Do research on the schools and make sure that the faculty interest are aligned to your interests. Rankings, prestige, location it all goes out the window once you get there. What matter is to choose the school where you can build the best relationships with both faculty and students.
The simplest way to take a gap year that will be financially suitable for you is to work while on it. I worked 50+ hours a week when I lived in Yellowstone and had plenty of spending money. There are many similarly remote jobs that will even pay for your housing, plus pay you about $100 a day and reimburse the cost of travel. Should you want to work in a more populated area, go out and apply. Tell employers you’re not going to be in school and see if you can get a full time job. I did that in Bozeman, MT and had three offers within a couple of days, all paying more than $11/hour (told a temp agency that I could work anywhere in any condition).
You might want to check out [Coolworks[/url] if you’re interested in a more remote job.
If you are not positive about college and interested in learning a trade, the federal government has a program called [url=<a href=“http://www.jobcorps.gov/home.aspx%5DJob”>http://www.jobcorps.gov/home.aspx]Job Corps](http://www.coolworks.com/) which provides dorms and a technical education to qualified low income students. It does not have the best reputation, largely thanks to many of the people it attracts, but if you are looking to do something besides college, it could be an option.
“No major interests me and I do not have the faintest idea of what I want to become.
I do not have a hobby or an interest. My favorite activity is to sleep.”
I agree…see your doctor…Mono? Depression?
My daughter is currently taking a Gap Year and doing an internship with the Student Conservation Corps. http://www.thesca.org/serve/positions
It is a relatively affordable option since they provide a travel allotment, housing, and a stipend for young adults working primarily in National Parks.
National Civilian Conservation Corps (through Americorps) is another affordable option which also provides housing and a stipend. Americorps also offers a scholarship for successful completion of NCCC or other Americorps positions (and many SCA positions are Americorps eligible. http://www.nationalservice.gov/programs/americorps/americorps-nccc While the deadline for NCCC is April 1 I STRONGLY encourage you to apply earlier as acceptance is rolling and you are more likely to be waitlisted if you delay.
Both these programs offer young adults a chance to see a different part of the country, have new experiences and engage in service.
Good luck!
When I was in high school I never did well. My parents are also immigrants and didn’t have any expectations for me other than finishing high school. They never talked about going to college. When I finish high school I went right to work doing odd jobs. I was bored and unchallenged with the jobs I had. I knew immediately that I wanted more. I didn’t know what I wanted to do but I knew one thing for certain, I didn’t want to work for minimum wage and just get by. Unfortunately I couldn’t afford college without working. I started at a community college part-time. To figure out what I wanted to do I took a class in Legal proceedings, Computer Programming, Stenography, Typing and Algebra. I discovered I was good in math and I loved Programming. I wasn’t dumb and I always knew that. I got A’s in all my classes and eventually I moved on to a 4 year college. It took me 8 years working full time while going to school part time to complete my degree in computer science and now I am a Director in charge of information systems in HR. I funded my education through student loans and with a job as a programmer I paid it off in 10 years.
You should know that an education will open doors for you. And if you choose to do it now or later it really doesn’t matter. You are the key to your own success and no one defines who you are but you. You have to figure this one out for yourself. Good Luck.
It is totally fine to take a gap year and spend it working in a paying job. That might help your situation at home and give you some time to figure out what you want to do. Our son took a gap year, worked at the local public library, and then applied for colleges during his gap year. It was a great experience for him and made him much a more committed student when he got to college this year.