Is my essay on the right track?

<p>Will anyone please read it, I'm worried because I have a different writing voice than most but I'm afraid that college admissions people won't like it. It's my very first rough draft so it's completely unedited but the most of the idea is there, anybody please?</p>

<p>I’ll read it!</p>

<p>@onmyway2013 I don’t know if it sent because I’m on my phone and this website works crazy on here but I tried ha, thanks anyways!!</p>

<p>Pm me, we can help each other?</p>

<p>I’ll read it!</p>

<p>Okay thanks!!! really appreciate it</p>

<p>Ill do it</p>