Your anecdotes have nothing to do with the OP and his parents.
They are upper middle class. They obviously care enough about the OP’s education to pay for prep school. They have probably been saving for college since the OP was a baby. They told the OP not to worry about the money and that they can make it work.
Now I think the OP ought to make sure they really can, without the OP borrowing too much on their own. I have no problem with parents borrowing money to fund education when they are competent to determine if they can afford it. But to just assume that the parents are incompetent? I don’t think that’s appropriate at all.
I’m sorry, can you spell out the inference from your statistics? You haven’t connected it to the OP’s parents.
What’s the probability that the OP’s parents will face bankruptcy if they pay for the more expensive college, conditioned on them being upper middle class (assume top 5-10% of the population in income)?
I have seen many situations where the parents have “made it work” only to run out of money by sophomore year requiring their kid to move home and go to the local school anyway.
OP, please get details from your parents. If they have the money and the plan for school#1, then you are good to go.
@classicrockerdad your assumptions seem mostly correct, my parents have savings for me to attend college which I believe would actually nearly cover the four years of tuition at the local college which currently seems like the path of least resistance for me. They are well-off and have savings, and in the same “make it work” conversation earlier my mom talked about how she’s already made a recent switch to full-time… they would be able to cover the price of either college without loans which is very fortunate for me. It’s really just an ethical dilemma because going to such an expensive college would still put a strain on them and I’d feel bad for that. I have a brother in a state school and they would be paying out-of-pocket for a lot of my tuition, but they are willing to if I really love the school (which I do and am attending an overnight stay at this week to be sure). I’m putting a lot of thought into this decision and am just looking for outside opinions/ what other people would do in this situation. My parents and I have been talking about it a lot, it’s just really difficult and sometimes hearing the insight of strangers online is helpful for these kinds of things
@mom2collegekids I’m confused by your comment about the merit aid/scholarship. I thought this was something which is separate from financial aid/acts as a gift or incentive for me to go to a school because of academic achievement and not so much need?
So basically, if I had gotten into the college and not qualified for merit aid I would still receive the 15k, but as financial aid, but since I received merit aid it just replaces financial need-based aid? What is the point of that?
This is important because I was planning to appeal to their finaid dept to see if they would match a similarly priced college which gave me 15k in grant aid based on need.
We paid a LOT for our kids to attend college…we could and we didn’t mind doing so.
This is a decision the OP needs to make with her family.
We had the money talk before applications were sent. Once acceptances were in, our kids were able to choose from all of their acceptances.
I should add…neither of our kids chose the least costly option. Since we could afford their choices…it was not an issue for us.
I think this issues between the OP and her family. Agreed…if the parents say they can cover the costs…and that OP can choose either school…then the OP should feel comfortable choosing either school.
Just be there for your parents when they are older! That will matter too!
If the total cost of the school is $60k and your EFC as calculated by the school is $20k, you have $40k in “need.” If you receive $10k in merit money (outside scholarships, merit money from the school, whatever) you have less need, right? In this situation, at a meets-full-need-school, you can expect to receive $30k in need-based aid, because $10k of your need has already been covered.
aww thanks guys my parents seem to have a similar opinion on college spending and I’m so glad for that. And thanks @BelknapPoint that clarifies the issue with need-based aid, although I think I will still try to contact the college’s finaid dept to see if there’s anything I can do
