Is she using me? If not, how do I become closer without scaring her away?

<p>Question: Is my new friend who I have known for 4 months using me because she has no good friends at school? Or does she genuinely like me? How do I become closer without scaring her away? I wish our friendship felt more natural. I guess it's to be expected since we don't spend that much time together..We've only hung out alone, outside of school, 4 or so times in 4 months.</p>

<p>I switched to a new, private, high school this year and almost immediately clicked with this girl in my grade. We had a lot in common. I soon found out that she had no good friends at school. The previous year, she had distanced herself from them because she got so wrapped up in her boyfriend. I'm now wondering if she is only friends with me out of necessity/desperation for friendship. She has best friends from camp, which is lucky. I have absolutely no one outside of school.</p>

<p>Since I was 6 and my parents divorced, my family life has been very dramatic and stressful. I arrived at my new school this year with no friends. So, you see, both of us were in need of a friend. She shares private things with me about her new boyfriend, ex boyfriend, etc. I hadn't shared much with her before since I don't have many neutral/happy-ish things to share...I don't have best friends, a boyfriend, etc. Anyway, the other evening, I was really upset because of some drama at home. I had never shared much with her regarding my family (we've known each other for about 4 months now) so I told her how my mother was acting like a child and she was lucky her mother was strict with her, etc. The thing is, I told her this over AIM. I could tell she felt awkward...she said "ooh" and "oh". Nothing warm and comforting, consoling. She didn't say she was sorry or she was here for me if I wanted to talk, etc. She didn't get it. I probably should have told her in person. I just felt odd that she shares things with me even besides secrets (I slept at her house for 2 nights while my mom was away...I don't like having friends over because my house is very small and uncomfortable) and I hadn't opened up to her. She never asks me many questions..I feel like I'm the only one who does, like I'm the only one who wants to get to know her.</p>

<p>I worry that perhaps this is a forced friendship. She invited me to be "sisters" on Facebook about a month after we met. I really like her and I'd like to be best friends (she calls me a best friend but I only feel it sometimes) but I worry that she doesn't like me as much...I don't know. Shouldn't close friendships come naturally? We both haven't totally let our guards down. Is it normal? We don't have any classes together - just lunch.</p>

<p>I felt so loved when she and her mother didn't want me to be alone at my house when my mom was away. It was really nice. But we often have nothing to talk about...I hate it. We really do connect but I'm so awkward when it comes to getting closer to friends. What do I do?? The issues in my life are really dark/deep...I don't want to burden her with them. Ugh.</p>

<p>She might be using you or she might just not be the type of person who has friendships that are that close. I’m guessing its the second one based on the fact that she lost all of her friends when she was with her boyfriend last year so I’m guessing she wasn’t super super close to them. It might be a combination of both of those two things. But to be honest I’m kind of the same way when bad stuff happens to people. I’m never really sure what to say because I don’t want to say something wrong.</p>