<p>i didn’t show anyone my essays either. i didn’t want anyone to steal my ideas. i already know i’m a pretty damn good writer. i wrote my essays the day it was due anyway so i couldn’t have showed anyone even if i wanted too lol</p>
<ol>
<li><p>I wrote about the first time I fell in love with Spanish in Mexico when I was a little kid and how language has always fascinated me. I tied it into wanting to travel and help less fortunate people/developing countries after I graduate, as well as my plan to get my teaching credentials and share my love for learning.</p></li>
<li><p>Wrote about how important it is to be empathetic and have compassion in this world and related it to growing up with a severely handicapped older sister who passed away my senior year of high school. So, mostly the theme of personal and familial struggles molding me into who I am today. </p></li>
</ol>
<p>I didn’t wind up showing anyone my essays. So far, admitted to UCLA under Spanish and Linguistics.</p>
<p>So many of you have such an interesting story! I am sorry to read about the less fortunate experiences some of you have had. :[ <3 Congrats for coming so far and not giving up!</p>
<p>For those of you who admit you just rambled about a generic sob story, you should give yourselves more credit if you genuinely faced some sort of personal hardship! And for those who seriously just BS’d it…you guys are some ballsy mo-fos! haha. Either way, looks like it has worked out in your favor so far!</p>
<p>@absurdmike lol…you are awesome.</p>
<p>90% of people write some type of sob story. Didn’t you know that 37 thousand UCLA students all grew up poor and donated a kidney to their dying 90 year old blind grandpa who was a vet in world war 2?</p>
<p>^haha. I would believe it, seeing how most people do have a story…the older I get, the more I realize everyone has had to deal with some s h i t…and if they haven’t yet, they will. C’est la vie. I just hope if they made it up, it was at least half as entertaining as the kidney-blind-grandpa example. lol. I’m sure most people “embellished” a little.</p>
<p>I wonder if the admissions board gets tired of reading sob story after sob story. I would imagine they appreciate more of a “I overcame such and such and now I’m awesome” type of story instead of the “look how bad my life is, pity me and admit me to your school” type. </p>
<p>Which UCs use the holistic review process and read the essays, anyway? Is it just LA and Cal?</p>
<ol>
<li>Passion for math, resource economics, pioneering new subfield of development economics.</li>
<li>Conviction by privilege and blessing to help others.</li>
<li>Why I transferred from a private 4-year to a CCC to a UC.</li>
</ol>
<p>I just showed them who I am. I’m a math major so I didn’t really have any super mathy-experience things to talk about. I mostly talked about who I am and what I want to do and I just tried to show them how passionate I am about fulfilling my dreams. Didn’t try to make myself look like a saint. I did, however, make it clear that I would use all that the UC has to offer and an investment in me would be an investment in society. But no sob stories or angelic stories haha Oh yeah, and I polished up the essays LIKE CRAZY. I had written like 10-15 drafts for each prompt and spent two months on them.</p>
<p>If anyone who hasn’t applied yet is reading this: Work hard on your personal statements… They do matter. And also, if you’re interested in Cal then I recommend applying for the Club Cal program: <a href=“http://students.berkeley.edu/admissions/general.asp?id=4342[/url]”>http://students.berkeley.edu/admissions/general.asp?id=4342</a></p>
<p>I worte about how I dyed my hair when I was kid “experimenting” with random fluids and this combined with playing sports lead me to be interested in biochem.</p>
<p>Second one I wrote about how I joined the army to get a free education and going to war and almost dying a few times reinforced my drive and determination I had for going to school.</p>
<p>2nd one I wrote about how I was changed by growing up in a small town, and how it positively influenced me and stuff.</p>
<ol>
<li><p>wrote about how my interest in business/economics developed from when i was in 5th grade to present-day</p></li>
<li><p>wrote about my volunteer work and how i came to manage a small project to send 1,000 pairs of donated shoes to barefoot kids in Gaza and how i managed to deal with aspects of the project such as a photoshoot (the aspect i mostly focused on) that i had no prior familiarity with whatsoever, basically just leadership and caring for people</p></li>
</ol>
<p>oh, and i got into ucla…</p>
<p>For my first one, I wrote how I wanted to become a journalist and how I started interning at a magazine and fell in love with the entire process-reporting, interviewing, ethical commitment, constantly learning.</p>
<p>Second one, I wrote about how I grew up in a military family, constantly moving, and that though the word “change” scared me when I was younger (it signified having no roots or connection to a place or to people), I learned that constant adaptation molded me into a more mature person with a stronger appreciation for different cultures and types of people. </p>
<p>It was better than it sounded haha :)</p>
<p>In at SD and UCLA :)</p>
<p>like mikei I’m a math major so experience per se is kinda hard, but for my first one I explained how I never felt like I fit in and how math provided solace for me, because at a time when nothing made sense it grounded me. I also mentioned how as an exchange student in europe my love for the subject grew when I realized it was truly the only universal language. I explained how, as an artist, I fell in love with the mathematical perfection present in all the masterpieces in European museums, and how I managed to merge both my creative and logical side. Basically, how I though math was beautiful, like art, and that was reason enough for me to study it…</p>
<p>For my second I explained what it was like to get Leukemia at 14 and attend high school while receiving chemo (hence the alienation described in essay #1). I explained the side effects it created both physical and mental, emphasizing the growth and maturity it provided me. I explained how my experience taught me to be confident in my ability to overcome all obstacle and achieve all my goals. </p>
<p>I had about 5 different people read (including my English prof.) and wrote about 5-6 different versions of each…LONG PROCESS…</p>
<p>btw…rejected at UCLA (they suck!) but still pending at UCSB and Cal…</p>
<p>Haha, wow. Trip down memory lane. My topics were all cliche, but I def. made them my own (I think… Heee).</p>
<ol>
<li><p>Hardship after moving from Korea but using my surroundings and experiences to find my identity. Took the time to specifically draw attention to my experience in Tanzania (I’ve been to a lot of mission trips, but this was was very special to me) and how what I learned (not only in Africa, but other trips as well) enabled me to find what I wanted to learn in college.</p></li>
<li><p>My struggles with bulimia and how, after overcoming it, I continue to use my ability to aid women who are self-destructive, in abusive relationships, and psychologically incapable due to insecurities. Tied this with my prospective major, too.</p></li>
</ol>
<p>Sob stories indeed! Hahaha. But I liked my essays. :)</p>
<p>seeing what everyone wrote about is really amazing. I wouldn’t look at writing about a hardship you went through as writing a sob story because if it was done correctly, like I believe mine was and I’m sure your’s were to, it just shows the applicants ability to overcome a hardship and be successful. I think it is amazing that a lot of us have made it this far in our education let alone that we are going to, or planning on going to, a UC. Congratulations everyone!</p>
<p>@edelynly it’s good to see someone else that has an eating disorder that is using their personal experience to help others in need! I really hope that you are doing well :)</p>
<ol>
<li><p>Nonprofit foundations (why I didn’t go to college after high school despite having the stats). Foundations being based in actually being homeless as a kid after parents’ divorce. Talked about how I hate whining and sob stories and that they’re never unique, the only unique thing about them is how and what is learned then utilized. Then about how civil rights law, social contract theory and political philosophy are things I want to use to further help others I think should never go through what I went through. </p></li>
<li><p>Writing - talked about it as a passion and spoke about short stories, poems and the one novella (not published yet, picked up by Vintage Independent Contemporaries, division of Random House inc.) I’ve published in the last 4 years since high school and what it means to me or whatever.</p></li>
</ol>
<p>I hit the trifecta in my second essay…</p>
<ol>
<li><p>Talked about the what the engineering field means to me, an achievement and passion rather than a career… Why I choose engineering… I talked about the first time I went to my father’s open house at work (Parker Hannifin) and how much that really inspired me…</p></li>
<li><p>First I talked about how Spanish was my first language and how I needed to overcome certain obstructions that most other kids didn’t have to in elementary and middle school. Then I talked about my parents lack in an education (only my father graduated high school - ESL program… mother only made it to the 6th grade) and how I learned everything I know (education and school wise) on my own… no help with homework and studying. Then I brought out the big guns… Talked about being diagnosed and living with cancer during college and how that affected me, my personal life, and my education.</p></li>
</ol>
<p>Accepted into UCR. Pending UCSD, UCSB, UCI.</p>
<p>The sad thing is that I wouldn’t mind getting rejected from those schools right now… if so, I know that I can try again next year and who knows maybe going down the premed path could be fun.</p>
<p>@shellbell - Ah, I just read your post. Props to us wonder women!!! 
Hahah, I know, cheesy right.</p>
<p>For my first one… Honestly, I barely remember now. Learning languages, being interested in other cultures and such.
My second one was on being too much of a perfectionist, taking too much on at once, and learning to reign that all in.
I didn’t show them to anyone, though I had planned to.</p>
<ol>
<li><p>How I started designing websites just for fun since I was 10 and learning basic HTML, and messing around with Paint Shop Pro, then being involved in the school newspaper in high school and community college, how that sparked my interest from journalism to graphic design (because of designing layouts)…I wrote about my experience as a designer for our CCC newspaper and working at the Mac computer lab helping students in their graphic communication classes. I concluded it with how I want to be inspired by the world and everyday things around me, especially for graphic design.</p></li>
<li><p>I wrote about how I always wanted to be a cheerleader and regret not trying out in high school. I tried out for the 2008-2009 year but didn’t get in, but I still persisted and prepared for the 2009-2010 tryouts, and was all super spirited and cheesy and did my best and ended up getting in the squad!!</p></li>
</ol>
<p>I guess I must have charmed UC Davis (I also have a good list of ECs) because I got accepted with a 3.0 GPA without IGETC and a few missing prereqs!</p>