<p>I'm seriously considering not coming home for Thanksgiving this year. I go to school about 8 hours away from home, so that would mean 16 hour drive for my parents (here and back) both ways, and that just seems like too much for 5 days. Additionally, the weather here can get nasty, and I don't like the thought of my parents driving long distance in bad conditions. Flying would also be problematic for various reasons, and I'm not that big on it myself (though I'll do it if I have to), so I'm considering just staying up here. The food places are closed for most of the break, but if I max out my meal plan on groceries before they close, I think I'll be able to manage.</p>
<p>OTOH, as much as have enjoyed my school so far, it would be nice visit home. I haven't been home in months, and I'd like to see my stuff, my bird, and my people and enjoy the "creature comforts" (homecooked food, landuary, and all that), but it just doesn't seem worth the hassle when Christmas break is only three weeks after Thanksgiving.</p>
<p>Parents, have any of your kids not come home for Thanksgiving? Did they regret it? Did you?</p>
<p>My daughter comes home for Christmas each year but not for Thanksgiving. She goes to school on the opposite coast, so flying is the only option. It's just too expensive and comsumes too much of the four day holiday to make it practical. We sure do miss her, but hey at that point Christmas break is only about three weeks away.</p>
<p>My son did not come home for Thanksgiving when he was in college on the east coast, and my daughter will not come home this year. (My son is now on the west coast so I think he will be coming). It really was never an issue -- it simply made no sense financially to pay for airfare when winter break is only 3 weeks later. </p>
<p>If you do stay at your college, I would suggest that you talk to other students and see if you can make arrangements with others who are staying in the area -- either to get invited to the home of someone whose family lives near by, or join other students who will be getting together to share the meal. Generally the campus gets pretty quiet over Thanksgiving weekend, without any other scheduled activities - so it can be pretty lonely, because even if there are other students around, they are not always easy to find when the regular campus hangouts are closed.</p>
<p>My D did not come home last year for Thanksgiving--but went to a friend's house. This year she is bringing a friend home with her who couldn't make a long trip home. I hate the thought of you sitting in a dorm alone. Will there be many other students around? Or is there someone more local that you could share the holiday with? I know it's a short break and I would assume that many students who go to school far from home don't make the trip--find some buddies to share the day with!</p>
<p>My oldest has never been able to come home for Thanksgiving--it's always snowing. This year though, she'll be able to drive and pick up her younger sister at the Naval Academy and go off kayaking. We'll miss them both, but the travel just doesn't work out...</p>
<p>My S is on the opposite coast also. He took a train to his Uncle's house for Thanksgiving last year, and will be going to his girlfriend's parents' home this year. He'll be back here for the Christmas break, but heading back in early Jan. for the intersession month. Last year he missed us some (his first Thanksgiving away), but he enjoyed the holiday and honestly, he didn't have time to fly here and back. And with holiday traffic as it is, it was just as well that he didn't do the transcontinental flight thing.</p>
<p>Could you find the home of someone who lives close(r) to campus, a friend who could invite you to share the holiday with their family? That would probably feel a lot better than just holing up in your dorm with an extra supply of groceries... Just remember to call home on Thanksgiving!</p>
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I hate the thought of you sitting in a dorm alone.
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<p>Ouch! I'm slightly offended by that. I'm not at all anti-social and have many friends here but still wouldn't feel comfortable barging in on someone's family holiday (and then having to explain that no, I can't eat that...). Most people seem to live in the not-local-but-too-close-to-stay-here vicinity. Now that I think about it, maybe one of the religious groups (either the Lutheran student group or my bible study group) will have a dinner. I'll look into that.</p>
<p>m&sdad,good idea. I'm glad to see I'm not the only student that misses their pets!</p>
<p>ETA: The groceries referred to other non-Thanksgiving days. Seriously, what is with people tonight?</p>
<p>D on opposite coast. As others have noted the trip is too long and too crowded. She will fly to her cousins' house, about one and one half hours.</p>
<p>My D will stay at her college this year for Thanksgiving. The college serves a special holiday meal since many students, especially international students, don't go home. She hopes to get a lot of work done. Her suite will be much quieter with fewer distractions. We'll miss her, but she'll be home for a whole month for winter break, and at that point all papers will be finished and she'll be free to have fun and relax. I think it's great that you're considering your parent's comfort , safety, and financial constraints.</p>
<p>We live in CA, D (just graduated) attended Syracuse. Freshman year, she flew home for Thanksgiving, and it was way too hectic - too much time battling crowds on the 2 heaviest travel days of the year, and because she was writing papers and studying for finals, not much time to relax with family. The next year, she spent Thanksgiving at the home of a college friend, a 2 hr drive away, the year after that had Thanksgiving dinner in town with her coach's family, and last year was studying abroad. Her brother, a freshman at Cornell, will remain on campus with a couple of his West Coast dorm-mates. He is looking forward to the long weekend, getting some work done, preparing for finals, and having free time to hang out with his friends. Don't know what he will do for Thanksgiving Day (local restaurants may be closed), but we left a few boxes of Betty Crocker meal-in-a-box when we visited 2 weeks ago during Parent's Weekend.</p>
<p>Wolfpiper, there are many families who would be absolutely delighted to have one or more of their kid's college friends as guest for thanksgiving, and would also be happy to accommodate special dietary needs (as long as the needs weren't too extreme - but if it's a matter of being vegetarian or a specific food allergy, it usually can be easily worked out.) </p>
<p>While you kids are off at college missing your family pets, we moms are at home feeling tremendously left out. If our kids had a lot of friends in high school who hung around the house a lot, then the house seems even more empty when the kids are away at college -- we do sometimes get a little bit attached to our kid's friends as well. </p>
<p>Of course the idea of checking whether your Lutheran or bible study group will have a dinner is an excellent idea -- just don't turn down any invitations that come your way because you feel uncomfortable. The nice thing about a Thanksgiving dinner is that there is plenty of food for everyone, and everyone expects a lot of hubbub and activity in the house, so extra guests usually just add to the fun.</p>
<p>too bad those turkey TV dinners today are all pretty much fake -otherwise students staying on campus over the holidays could enjoy excellent meals</p>
<p>How big is the Thanksgiving holiday with your family? Maybe your parents don't even care about the drive and all that - they just want to spend the holiday with you.</p>
<p>I know people that Thanksgiving is a bigger family holiday than Christmas, so I guess it depends on tradition and all that.</p>
<p>But, don't feel guilty at all about going to a friend's home for Thanksgiving. I love it when my D brings home some of her friends from college - some of them grew up in totally different types of environments that we have such a great time comparing everything!</p>
<p>Also, if you do stay at college, have you thought about helping out at a place that serves Thanksgiving dinners to the homeless or underprivileged - if there is such a place near you?</p>
<p>m&sdad, if you decide some time that you want to bring the dogs, check out petswelcome.com for a travelocity-style web service locating pet-friendly hotels. I use it all the time, and it's great.</p>
<p>Last year, we played hosts to S's suitemate and his GF who come from the West Coast. Perhaps you have friends who are local and will be similarly delighted to share Thanksgiving with you? I have some food allergies myself, so I always enquire of guests if they have any beforehand.<br>
Please believe that you won't be "barging in" on other people's Thanksgiving. It's for sharing, after all.</p>
<p>S 1 came home for Thanksgiving only his freshmen year. S2 has never come home (and he's a junior.) Once they met up with other family members who lived several hours away by train. Once S1 took the bus to S2's place and they spent it together. S2 helps cook dinner in the cafeteria for the International and other students who can't go home. Last year he accepted an invitation to a friend's parents' house. There are lots of options. He tends to see the holiday as an opportunity to get some serious composition done in peace and quiet, and knows that he has 3 weeks at Christmas coming up to spend with family.</p>
<p>Rorosen - the cold turkey is the reason to skip the day AFTER Thanksgiving. :)</p>
<p>When I was in college, I went home for one out of the four Thanksgivings. One, I spent with a friend's family (and despite my initial trepidation, I had a blast) and the other two I cooked a Thanksgiving meal off-campus with a handful of other students who didn't go home. In all three instances, I was invited to a professor's home as well, but I felt more comfortable with my other options. </p>
<p>I suggest discussing this with your parents. They might <em>want</em> to make the drive because they were counting on seeing you. I'm sure you'll be able to tell on the phone whether they would be relieved not to make the drive or upset that they might not see you. While I don't advocate letting parental guilt and wants dictate what a person does, you seem to be making your decision more based on courtesy to them than on a real desire to stay put. If that's the case, you really need to feel them out first.</p>