<p>To make a long story short, those at the Admissions Office told me to submit another essay for the Mellon College of Science and I would be really grateful to anyone who would critique it for me. Thank you so much!!</p>
<p>Anyone? 
I need to turn it into their office tomorrow.</p>
<p>I will, if you want. PM it.</p>
<p>I sent it over. You can pm me back with what you think. And thanks!</p>