<p>Hey guys,
As many of you may know I am a happy freshman at NMH this year, and am excited to see what my BS experience gives me these next several years. What you may not know about me is that I am also an openly gay student. I've found that NMH is a very accepting school, and while the gay community here is not crazy huge it's very good for a school of this size. NMH is a very liberal/artsy type of school, so I was not extremely surprised by how great the environment here is about these issues (even our Dean of Students is a lesbian!), but I am really interested in how other schools treat and recognize the LGBT community. I'd love to hear everyone's thoughts on the subject!
Thanks :)
Willem</p>
<p>This has been posted before, but I think it speaks well of Choate:</p>
<p>[Find</a> a Different Word](<a href=“Find a Different Word - YouTube”>Find a Different Word - YouTube)</p>
<p>I’ve actually seen that before! Theres this cool facebook group called “I was/am gay in an elite prep school”, and people post some awesome stuff! I have to agree that choate seems to be good in supporting students. Maybe this is because they have such a strong arts program? Do you think that schools with stronger arts programs are also (many times) more accepting and liberal? NMH has one of the best arts programs prep-wise, and is very accepting, and it seems that Choate follows suit. Thoughts?</p>
<p>^^Can only add anecdotally from friends with a (maybe?straight) child at Interlochen that it is extremely LGBT friendly.</p>
<p>Cate School has a large LGBT presence, and one of the largest clubs on campus is F.L.A.G (Friends of Lesbians and Gays). It is in California as opposed to the East Coast, which may have had some effect. I can’t say definitively but I’ve also heard this to be the case with schools like Thacher and Idyllwilde as well.</p>
<p>Very true about Interlochen and Idyllwilde I’m sure. Both arts schools, generally leading into a very strong gay culture. Interesting about CA schools. Definitely NE schools have a bit more pomp & circumstance/snobbery that might translate into older, more conservative institutions.</p>
<p>Andover has a pretty accepting environment of LGBT people. There are plenty of openly gay people on campus, and the GSA is active. I have a few friends who are gay, and they’re well accepted by the community. Andover is very liberal, so anything less than full acceptance (and recently hoards of people changing their profile pictures to support gay marriage rights) would be kind of surprising.</p>
<p>At an incredibly homophobic GLADCHEMMS. The GSA is basically gays and their straight girl pals. Straight guys here don’t seem so supportive of homosexuality, but that’s because many of the gay students are too sassy and effeminate.</p>
<p>And I can’t even find a boyfriend. Boo freaking hoo.</p>
<p>I’m straight and not involved in Lawrenceville’s gay community, so I’m not exactly in the know; however, one of the two finalists of the school’s presidential election for next year is a very popular, openly lesbian student. It’s pretty cool.</p>
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<p>This is a unique statement. I’ve read it several times and am perplexed by it. I can’t make heads or tails of your characterization of the school’s homophobia, particularly as it relates to the second clause of your third sentence. </p>
<p>I also can’t understand how it relates to your personal life.</p>
<p>@Escribien: I more often than not string together unrelated ideas; maybe that’s why I confuse myself sometimes. I’ll break down the crux of the matter in an easier way to comprehend:</p>
<ol>
<li>I’m a gay boy at a GLADCHEMMS.</li>
<li>My school is both gay-friendly and gay-unfriendly, depending on how you look at it.</li>
<li>It’s gay friendly because it has a GSA, which I am not a part of, that consists of gay people and their incredibly supportive straight female friends.</li>
<li>But pretty much everyone else is homophobic OR does not give a crap OR makes gay jokes on a daily basis. And I’m one of them. To stay safe in the closet.</li>
<li>But I sort of understand the reason for the homophobic disposition prevalent in the straight population. Some of the openly gays here are sassy and effeminate guys who are likely to disgust/annoy the hell out of the straight guys as much as they do me.</li>
<li>I’m a teenager, and I want to be in a relationship too. Who doesn’t??? :(</li>
</ol>
<p>Ah, I see, Converge. Your post is clearer to me now. </p>
<p>I feel for you. You’re in a tough spot. </p>
<p>Living behind enemy lines is so exhausting that it’s only when the shackles are off that you marvel at how you did it. I know of what I speak. I’m gay, went to a boarding school frequently discussed on these boards in the 80s, sort of right before the first college GSAs. </p>
<p>I look back at that young me and feel a lot of sympathy for him. All you could see was a little face hidden in a giant yarn-ball of chains, but I don’t blame him for not having the courage to come out at that time. Straight male contempt for gay men was monolithic, and he internalized all of it. It took a long time to shake that off. </p>
<p>It’s better today, obviously, but it makes you wonder if there will ever be a time when being gay is as easy as being straight. (Not that being straight is a cakewalk either, mind you, but you know what I mean – “straight boy/girl!” is not a common playground epithet, now is it?)</p>
<p>In any event, one thing to ponder, if you haven’t already, is the notion that whatever unhappiness you feel today, might, some day, under best circumstances, metamorphose into a priceless source of compassion. Stranger things have happened. </p>
<p>Good luck.</p>
<p>Do you mind saying what school you’re at, converge?</p>
<p>And the lesbian girl won the election!</p>
<p>We call ourselves Lawrentians. And yes, Maya Peterson was elected president. Let’s see if gay marriage will be implemented in the boys’ dorms next year.</p>
<p>Thanks, Escribiendo, for the good luck. I grew up in a culture where homosexuality is considered a social aberration, and it has been hard. So I don’t think I’ll ever come out of the closet. At least not openly. But I certainly will to some cute, non-annoying gay boy who shares my interests, that I’ll hopefully meet one day before I finally kill myself.</p>
<p>Well I really hope you don’t kill yourself, converge. There is someone out there for you, just like there is a cute gay boy out there for me. I hope that someday you will feel able to tell the world who you really are. Being out isn’t the easiest thing, but I am the happiest now than I have been in a long time. And if you ever need anyone to talk to, please, don’t hesitate to pm me.</p>
<p>Well thanks, Willem, but I have lost my faith in online fagship as a remedy. My friendship with a gay guy at HADES that began 9 months ago is starting to fall apart, despite that we have a lot in common.</p>
<p>On a side note, I hate you optimistic fags. You know what, get real. This heterosexual world is not for us. Stay delusionally contented in that idyllic bubble of yours, whatever; nothing in the real world is gonna change. Your gal pals barely constitue a modicum of the Earth’s populace. There will never be a time when disclosing our sexuality to everyone feels as comfortable as declaring our names. Also, what, cute guys for me? 10% of the population is gay. Over half of them are obnoxious. That leaves us with 4 out of 100. Only 30% of these are cute, and only a signifcantly fewer number share my interests. Factoring in the condition that they have to be interested in me as well, what are the odds.</p>
<p>[LGBTQ</a> at Andover: Then and Now | The Phillipian Online](<a href=“http://www.phillipian.net/articles/2013/04/05/lgbtq-andover-then-and-now-0]LGBTQ”>http://www.phillipian.net/articles/2013/04/05/lgbtq-andover-then-and-now-0)</p>
<p>Converge, I really am concerned by your post. One one hand, I totally understand what you’re saying. I also get annoyed by the gays who view themselves as little poodles, and who have numerous “girlfriends” and act cliche all the time. I try to break stereotypes, not become one, however hard it sometimes is. I feel bad that you have grown up in a community that isn’t accepting of homosexuals. I get that you are angry that some gay people don’t deal with that, that they go through life without having those struggles. I’m one of those gays. My family accepts me, my friends accept me, I’ve always been comfortable and supported. I have no problem telling people I’m gay because I’ve never dealt with someone who doesn’t respect my sexuality. I’m not content, however, because i know that people like you DO struggle, you who have no right to feel that way. Nobody should have to feel that way. But the real world IS changing- in the past five years the general acceptance of gays and gay marriage has skyrocketed. More states have approved gay marriage, and it looks like the DOMA will soon be overturned. Within the next twenty years I promise you that we will be accepted and supported by the vast majority, and I don’t doubt that marriage equality laws will have been instated. Don’t lose hope. Especially on the rest of the gay population. Who are you to say that half of gays are annoying? I doubt you’ve met over 50 gays your age, much less the millions that make up the rest of the LGBTQ community. If you want to sit in your room and whine about how hard your life is being gay, then do it. You think I don’t feel pain? You think I don’t wish my life was easier? I may be accepted at large, but I’ve dealt with a lot, been through a lot. There’s not a day goes by that I don’t feel the consequences of being me. But I don’t give up. I don’t sulk about it. I have a gift- my life. And I’m dead set on using it.</p>