Long distance relationships

<p>So my gf is going to UCSD and I am going to Rice. I know most long distance relationships don't work but my gf and I both agreed to give it a try. Is this a bad idea. If we are to give it a try, any advice from kids in long distance relationships?</p>

<p>Depends how commited you BOTH are.</p>

<p>Depends how frequently you will see each other.(if its less than once a month, dont bother)</p>

<p>even if you don't see each other for once a month, don't give up. most likely you won't be able to. who will have that kind of money to spend on airfare? -_- </p>

<p>but yeah, it's all about commitment. you'll both be meeting tons and tons of new people and it'll all depend how much you two like each other and want your relationship to work out.</p>

<p>depends...if it hinders you from going out and getting to know people then its a bad idea</p>

<p>We've been together for almost a year now so I'd say we're quite stable.</p>

<p>Cmon, I go to school in Houston and she goes to school is SD. After I leave in August, the next time we see each other is prolly going to be during winter break.</p>

<p>Should we really just break up over summer?</p>

<p>Long distance relationships are the reason why I think dating in high school is one of the most useless things in the world(even though I did it ALOT...). It's more of a casual affection thing and USUALLY will lead to absolutely nothing but needless emotional strain.</p>

<p>i've seen a lot of people who can't even make a good relationship continue to work their first year of college having gone to the same school...and i would say that dating for almost a year is not long enough at your age for it to really be all that stable in a long distance situation. BUT if you honestly think it will work then go for it because there's always an exception to the norm</p>

<p>Trust me....</p>

<p>It WONT work...</p>

<p>Someone's gonna get drunk and make a "mistake"...</p>

<p>No telling who!</p>

<p>First, both of us don't drink and I've decided not to drink in college either. hokegoalie, what has your experiences with long distance relationships? Care to share an anecdote perhaps?</p>

<p>It's better to end it on good terms than to have it negatively affect either of you at school. The best scenario is that you break it off, but remain in close contact with each other, and if the timing is right and things work out - you can get back together again later on. At least you'll remain friends. (spoken from a guy who is not friends with any of his exes)</p>

<p>Edited to add: don't make bold statements that you'll never drink. Granted it's rice and it's not "known" for any sort of party scene, but don't make judgements on things you haven't seen and experienced. There are far worse vices than the fire water.</p>

<p>Why of course!</p>

<p>Started a relationship with a girl for about 3 months. She went halfway across the country for college. She had MAJOR trust issues, so I had two choices, lie about what I did with my day or tell her the truth and get an earful. Even when it came to simple things like hanging out with another girl, it was OMG WHAT ELSE DID YOU DO?! WHAT ELSE DID YOU DO? DID SHE COME ON TO YOU?! DID YOU KISS HER?!...Perhaps you wont have this issue...but...it wont work...</p>

<p>Bigredmed, I am not drinking for several reasons:</p>

<ol>
<li>My morals</li>
<li>I just dont like alcohol. I had a sip once and it seriously tasted like horse ****.</li>
<li>I am a premed and I dont want anything on my record.</li>
</ol>

<p>Don't be suprised if your morals go out the window in college.</p>

<p>Don't be suprised at all.</p>

<p>some long distance relationships do work, and I think it has to do with how committed you two are & how well you communicate with each other. If you talk everyday on the phone about everything that happens, then it lessens the distance between you & you might be able to make it work. If you don't tell eachother everything, then the trust can go away & weaken the relationship.</p>

<p>In highschool, a friend of mine started dating a girl (she was a junior, we were seniors) in April, so they were only together 5 months before he had to leave for college (we went to the same university). They talked everyday on the phone, she visited as much as she could.. then when she went off to college a year later - she chose a school on the opposite coast! Anyway... they are still together 4 years later. He'll graduate next year & is planning on getting a job or going to grad school over there so he can be near her again. So, every night at 9pm PST... they talk on the phone... for hours... no matter who they are with or where they are. (It can get quite annoying to hang out with him at night)</p>

<p>Aww...come on, guys...at least he's starting out the right way in my opinion! Go you, squarehead! I hope and pray that you can adhere to your ideals! But I have to admit that I agree with Bigredmed as far as what to do next is concerned. Don't think of this as a break-off but as a "trial period" to really see whether you both are right for each other. My mother often says that if it's meant to be, God or whoever you believe in will bring you together and then you'll know that your future really lies with that person. Good luck to both of you!</p>

<p>i started dating someone a year older than me, at the end of my junior year and his senior year in high school. when he went off to college we were able to stay together throughout the year. we talked on the phone almost everyday, and also emailed back and forth a lot. we used snail mail too, just for fun (everyone likes recieving presents or letters!) as long as you are willing to put in the effort to keep in touch, it is not that difficult. we were also lucky enough to see eachother about once every 4-5 weeks, if even just for a weekend. </p>

<p>don't get discouraged by everyone else here. if you both want to keep it together, you probably can. i know many couples who have stayed in long distance college relationships and you can too. i'm certainly glad i did!</p>

<p>
[quote]
Don't be suprised if your morals go out the window in college.</p>

<p>Don't be suprised at all.

[/quote]
</p>

<p>If your morals "go out the window" then they weren't really strong morals in first place :p</p>

<p>I am just going to reitterate what others are saying here. If you want it to work, it will. </p>

<p>However, if you are wble to ask the question, "should we break up?" I am not sure the commitment will be there. </p>

<p>I have been dating my current boyfriend for about 2.5 years and we are going to school on opposite sides of the country (CA and PA). When we graduated from high school, breaking up was not an option, and it still isn't. </p>

<p>It's not easy. I miss him everyday and definetly don't get to see him as much as I would like. But it is totally worth it. </p>

<p>Also, like others have said here, its really important that the two of you trust each other. </p>

<p>Good luck! </p>

<p>(hey, I survived my first year of college without a sip of alcohol! It's possible!)</p>

<p>Some long distance couples manage to work through the distance and some don't...it is really up to how you and your girlfriend feel about eachother and how much work you two are willing to put into the relationship to make it work between trust issues, missing eachother, being around other people..etc. They do say that college changes people so you really never know how a relationship will turn out...especially with miles separating you two.</p>

<p>Well me and my girl are going to two different colleges, but both in the state of Maryland (UMD for me, Villa Julie for her). They are only 45 minutes away and public transportation goes between them, so I will see her atleast 2 weekends a month. We live right near each other so on breaks and summers we will always see each other. Ours will definitely work. Don't even know if you can call it a distance relationship, but whatever.</p>

<p>But here's some advice from a guy I know. Too little distance is a bad thing. Too much distance is a bad thing. But sometimes, not seeing the girl EVERYDAY, not hanging out with her EVERYDAY, can make the relationship stronger. This is why I think my situation will work, and yours, doubtful. Phone se-, I mean calls, just aren't fun my man! It's the REAL thing we're all after!!! ;)</p>