<p>There is something I must confess; I have a shoe obsession. To me the shoes I wear are not just a covering for the two feet on which I tread but a refection of who I am. On the days, my high top yellow retro fours encompass my feet are the days I allude confidence and leadership. No one can put my shoes in the same category as the every day loafer, or stark brown sandals because mine stand-alone. They express my everyday routines and feelings. Therefore, the correct shoe choice can be crucial. For example, I might be wearing my sheepskin moccasins. I wear these on winter nights when I am spending quality time with the ones that mean most to me; my family. They help me to relax on Saturdays college game day and represent my individuality, character, and need for risk taking. When I do not feel like drawing attention to my feet, or for that matter, to myself, I wear my Nike air max crepes. The weaving of the hemp mimics the intertwining relationships I have with those around me. They represent the teammates I sweat with and the peers I study with.
During college, I intend to add to my collection yet another pair of colorful high tops. For each aspect of my personality I discover or enhance through my college experiences, I will find a pair of shoes to reflect it. These shoes will embody each aspect of my personality in a single footstep. No longer will I have a separate pair for each quirk and quality. This one pair will say it all. It will be evidence of my self-awareness and maturity. Depicting my college experiences in every step and opening my mind to the world that awaits me.</p>
<p>I would suggest refraining from posting personal information such as essays on the boards - if you want critiques, PM your essays to individuals who agree to help.</p>
<p>Aside from that, I noticed several grammar mistakes, mainly punctuation errors, that you will want to correct before submitting this essay. Content-wise, it's original, but I don't really understand the shift from many shoes to one shoes. Since the colleges want to know what you will bring to the campus, I would assume that they would want your personality as you know it is now, not what you speculate it might be later, with change. I could be wrong, but that's just my two cents.</p>
<p>I wonder, why do your moccasins, which you wear to relax on game day, represent your need for risk-taking? Make sure you're not overly vague in your explanation.</p>
<p>For example, I might be wearing my sheepskin moccasins. I wear these on winter nights when I am spending quality time with the ones that mean most to me; my family.</p>
<p>Should be ":my family."<br>
Correct me if im wrong.</p>