<p>I'm in my 2nd year at a commuter college, and I'm having trouble making friends. I'd say I've met quite a few people and I have friends that I can talk to in class, eat lunch with, etc.. But there's no one that I feel like I can spend time with outside of school. It seems like all my friends in college have friends of their own (from high school, mainly) and really aren't that interested. Even on campus, most people tend to stick to their old friends.
There are plenty of clubs on campus and I've joined one, which hasn't really helped that much. I've noticed that the people that do join various student organizations don't really become close friends either. Sure, they go on trips or have group events once in a while, but I think that's about it. </p>
<p>So, has anyone else been in a similar situation? How do you get out of it??</p>
<p>i haven't been in the same situation with the commuter school, but there are some universal guidelines...pretty much, yeah it will take some initiative. you said that you do talk to people at lunch and class...if you really wouldn't mind hanging out with this person (i.e., you're not just desperate ;)) get on the topic of what someone's doing during this week or that week, and somehow direct the conversation so that you can ask them if you can join, or just ask for their number as a friend. and then at some point call them and see if they're up to anything. you may have to be a little more outgoing than usual at first, and you will get turned down occasionally. just don't take it too personally or to heart, you'll eventually find out your comfort zone.</p>
<p>and as always, the surefire way of making more friends is to just meet lots more people...you have a greater chance of meeting someone who wants a friend just as much as you do. there's so many people everywhere--in the world, your state, your city, your school, etc.--that it's extremely difficult to not find someone who wouldn't want to be your friend.</p>
<p>Form a study group for a class before a test by talking to the people you said you would eat lunch with or chat with. Bring something to eat (cookies maybe) or invite them to go out with you after for coffee, etc to show that you mean for it to be more than studying. If things go well, maybe hang out sometime.</p>
<p>Other than that, starting a club or even attending club meetings for something you are remotely interested can help. Joining more than one club will increase chances.</p>
<p>Doing some volunteer work, joining a church, or getting a part time job could also have you meet people outside a school setting. Maybe your college hgas kids with the one track minds of just wanting to go home after school...</p>
<p>There's also the posibility that you are not in the setting for you to be able to make close friends. I was like this in high school, and it was clickish and everyone seemed to ignore me...even in school and out of school activities. I got the college, and even though I'm still shy, have a close group of friends. It was just the difference of common interest and maturity. (all my friends are much older than I am)</p>
<p>If things don't work now, you can keep up your hopes for future possibility. Don't give up!</p>
<p>I have been in a similar situation with you!!!</p>
<pre><code> I have been attending a community college for the last two years. This summer is my final semester and then I will transfer to a four year university this fall 07 =)
Anyways, my first semester experience in the community college was not fun at all. Since Ive just moved to the area, I didn't have any friends at all. A lot of students in my college were older than me, and they were too busy with their life; had a job and family/+kids; therefore, they had little attachment to the college's life.
In my second semester, I started to work on campus as a math tutor. Being a peer tutor is an excellent way to get a friend. You will need to talk to the students, listen to their problems/concerns, and then you try to help them. Many of my students even talked about their personal life such as their family, boyfriend/girlfriend. Now I have some close friends because of working as a math tutor.
In my third semester, I took a lot of hard classes such as Chemistry, Physics for Engineers/scientists, Differential Equation, and two engineering courses. I noticed a lot of students in my chemistry and physics classes have some problems with the materials so I asked them if they wanted to form a study group. The study group worked really well. All members in the group pass the class. Some of them even got an A ( I got an A :p). I also made really close friends from that.
It is not easy to make a friend at community college because most people who go there already busy with their own life. Based on my experiences, some of the excellent ways to make a friend are:
1. Work on campus. (Be a peer tutor is the best. I have worked as a lab assistance and a librarian on campus, but if you want to make a lot of friends, be a peer tutor)
2. Form a study group.
3. Join campus activities. ( I joined Associate student and some academic competitions in my college, and they also helped me to get friends).
</code></pre>
<p>I hope that helps =)</p>
<p>Ryan.</p>
<p>ps: I wouldn't recommend you to go to nightclub to get friends. It's true that you may get a friend and even a boyfriend/girlfriend by going to a nightclub, but it would be better if you have friends who also go to college, and many people who often go to a nightclub have little interest in education.</p>