<p>how to make it to April, or at least to the first acceptance, without a nervous breakdown?</p>
<p>Just keep breathing. Don’t watch the mailbox.</p>
<p>clean house
stay off the ACCEPTED!!! threads</p>
<p>and when all else fails</p>
<p>bailey’s Irish creme… taken medicinally of course.</p>
<p>I just had a chocolate coconut cupcake. Much better now.</p>
<p>AS if we weren’t stressed enough, this week I, the parent, got a letter and an email from two of S’s schools telling us of the huge number of apps and small number of acceptances. Thanks. One of the schools was the one that we thought was a pretty sure thing but the letter made it sound like they only accept 13% of applicants. (Not sure of my math but it said 4700 applications for 620 places). Then I woke up and realized that they actually accept about 40%. S says that he is the only one in his classes that has not had at least one acceptance already. He is nervous but probably not as stressed as I.</p>
<p>Shopping is quite distracting…</p>
<p>My son is one of the very few in his small senior class that does not have an acceptance yet. He has no denials either. I’d really wanted him to get a safety school in rolling – but his opinion was that it didn’t matter since there wasn’t a school he was interested in that had early non binding notifications.</p>
<p>We’re going to Florida for spring break in a desperate attempt to avoid some of the March Madness.</p>
<p>I’ve posted this before, but will revive it because it is important. </p>
<p>Speak to family and friends and student about how we accept news. </p>
<p>Happy blessings are received with an attitude of graditude and words of appreciation for those who helped us arrive at our happy state. Gloating is tacky (acceptable for five minutes in one’s bedroom with one’s best friend if BF also has had happy news). </p>
<p>Hard news is accepted with a (one) box of kleenex and a quart of ice cream. Any more boo hooing is in bad form (after all, no one died here). On going boo hooing wastes trees (too many tissues), gives one a dreadful stuffed nose (most uncomfortable) and too much ice cream makes the backside as wide as Wyoming. </p>
<p>This is the protocal for all life’s events that do not involve a death. Dignity is available to all of us if we just plan to be dignified. </p>
<p>Talk about this NOW. Kids do best if they know the pattern they are to follow. </p>
<p>I am constantly uncomfortable about the drama that CC engenders around college acceptances. We are proud of our children. We should not let a college admissions office change that or inflate that.</p>
<p>Olymom –</p>
<p>That ought to be distributed by every guidance counselor at our school.</p>
<p>“I am constantly uncomfortable about the drama that CC engenders around college acceptances. We are proud of our children. We should not let a college admissions office change that or inflate that.” </p>
<p>Well said.</p>
<p>Good advice above. I love the guidelines for how to accept news.</p>
<p>No gloating here, but if you have other kids coming down the pipe, really, really encourage them to work on some early action schools. It makes a huge difference to have one in the bag during the March madness (one of D’s friends is going absolutely nuts waiting to hear from schools, the mood swings are driving everyone else crazy).</p>
<p>Txt Updates, Treats, The Talk, Exercise!</p>
<p>I text my D with a “no college mail today” message when I get home get to the mailbox first, so she can relax for the rest of her day which sometimes doesn’t end til about 7 pm --our mail comes around 2 pm. It seems to help.</p>
<p>I’ve given her small, random tokens every few days this month—a tiny bag of her favorite candy, a new lip gloss, a $10 Jamba Juice gift card to treat a friend after school, a novel I recently read that I thought she could lose herself in at night instead of obsessing on Facebook or (gasp!) CC. </p>
<p>We’ve had the how to accept good and bad news talk and included my H on that, very important. She brought this up to talk about how she and a good friend have applied to the same school and friend has decided this is her top choice—awkward, as my D probably has the stronger application and her HS is small, and this school is NOT Ds top choice. </p>
<p>We also talked about what she’s achieved so far, and what she wants to get out of the next 4 years, regardless of where that happens. THAT was a stress-reliever because we focused on how your college years are what you make of them, not necessarily dependent on WHERE you spend them.</p>
<p>I love Olymom’s advice of kleenex, ice cream a teeny bit of private gloating if you are so fortunate, then move on because no one died, and no one has won a Nobel Prize either—just a lottery. And, my daughter has requested “no matter what” that we have a lobster dinner the night of April 1st! She has also scheduled herself for Friday afternoon massages which she is paying for herself from a Christmas gift card. </p>
<p>Last, but not least, exercise doing something you love: that goes for parents and kids!</p>
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</p>
<p>Okay but if we do that, I’ll have another college tuition to face in l9 years! Oh noes!</p>
<p>We paid the county snowplows to tear down the mailbox. (only sorta kidding)</p>
<p>EA/rolling admissions makes this process a lot easier. Frankly, with both my kids, by now they were/are just ready to start making decisions, and which schools are in the pile is no longer as big an issue. They worried about where to apply/where they’d fit last summer/early fall.</p>
<p>I also come here to vent if needed so that I don’t dump on my kids.</p>
<p>Olymom has excellent advice.</p>
<p>Olymom -excellent points!!!</p>
<p>But - as the wife of a Duke alum…“March Madness” ONLY means basketball in this house!!! Our entire schedule revolves around these games!!! (I am NOT a Duke grad…so I really don’t care…but I know it’s important to DH!!!)</p>
<p>Of course, it helps that DS is set with his first choice (altho, not an ACC school!)- including the honors college! Best of luck to all those still waiting!!!</p>
<p>paying3tuitions LOL :)</p>
<p>got RPI acceptance, we are breathing again!</p>
<p>Those of you with happy news, please do take time to talk to offspring about navigating the mind fields of speaking with others who 1) haven’t heard or 2) had bad news. It can be extremely hard to find a tone of voice that isn’t 1) perky and irritating or 2) pitying and irritating. Some fierce version of “Well, those admissions officers at Yourchoice College clearly are morons and bat blind jerks to pass on you. I’ll never forgive them!” is supportive without being condescending. </p>
<p>It is helpful, too, to have a family “dump” song. Country Western music is full of them but here’s one from the Irish folk song tradition. What’s wonderful is that this is a very upbeat, cheerful tune. There’s no way to hear it without finding resolve lighting in the heart. </p>
<p>Mormand Braes</p>
<p>As I get doon by Strichen toon I heard a fair maid mournin’
She was makin’ sair complaint for her true love ne’er returnin’</p>
<p>So fare ye weel ye Mormond Braes, where oft times I been cheery
Fare ye weel ye Mormond Braes for it’s there I lost my dearie</p>
<p>There’s as guid fish intae the sea as ever yet was taken
So I’ll cast my net an’ try again for I’m only once forsaken</p>
<p>So fare ye weel ye Mormond Braes, where oft times I been cheery
Fare ye weel ye Mormond Braes for it’s there I lost my dearie</p>
<p>There’s many a horse has snappert an’ fa’n (fallen) and risen again fu’ rarely
There’s many a lass has lost her lad an’ gotten another right early</p>
<p>So fare ye weel ye Mormond Braes, where oft times I been cheery
Fare ye weel ye Mormond Braes for it’s there I lost my dearie</p>
<p>So I’ll put on my goon (gown) o’ green, it’s a forsaken token
An’ that will let the young lads know that the bonds of love are broken</p>
<p>So fare ye weel ye Mormond Braes, where oft times I been cheery
Fare ye weel ye Mormond Braes for it’s there I lost my dearie</p>
<p>So I’ll gang back to Strichen toon, where I was bred an’ born in
And there I’ll get another fine girl, to marry me in the mornin’</p>
<p>An excellent performance on youtube:</p>
<p>[YouTube</a> - 12-string Guitar: Mormon Braes](<a href=“http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xWYUXEGmjwY]YouTube”>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xWYUXEGmjwY)</p>
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<p>Hah! The year my kid applied, the snowplow did indeed take down our mailbox–and the huge pile of packed roadside snow was much to big to enable us to put up another one. </p>
<p>As a result, I had to go to the post office every day to pick up our mail. Absolutely the worst possible thing for a parent sweating out the decisions and doing their utmost to appear calm in from of the kid. 
The postman who tended the window at that hour–who is a very nice guy–got into it with me. I remember him handing me a pile with the first big envelope in it saying, “And that’s the GOOD envelope!”</p>
<p>Consolation, our snow finally melted enough this week that we could put in another mailbox – hope it stays up because the ground is pure MUD. The folks at the PO kept wondering why I was coming by EVERY DAY to pick up mail… :)</p>
<p>Yeah, Brooklynborndad!!! We know folks at RPI who are very happy.</p>