<p>Marilee Jones, Dean of Admission at MIT, spoke at our school, before our Junior Parent College night, and I wish I'd heard her years ago. Great advice about letting our children own the admission process. She equated it to an initiation process and said that the journey is the reward (my interpretation of what she said) not where your child ends up. I guess her book is coming out soon and I think it should be required reading for all of us overly concerned parents. She certainly helped me focus on trying to find that balance between involved and running the show. I like how she referred to the process as trying to find that match -- not forcing a child into any particular direction because that's what we the parents want, but helping support them as they find the match for them. Many deep breaths all around.</p>
<p>A journey is a great way to look at it. I don't know much about the process beyond service academies, my S only applied to them and got his LOA and nomination in December, so he never applied anywhere else. But one of the things that they all said during the process was that the process itself was created to make sure there was a sufficient attention to detail so as to determine if the candiate was squared away enough to get through just the paperwork.</p>
<p>If we're able to disengage from the "which college they end up at" result frenzy and see this process as an opportunity for our emerging young adults to take some looks at who they are, what sorts of places, people, and pursuits best suit and attract them, and start thinking about what they might contribute to the world through their lives, it can be a very worthwhile process indeed. It is so very difficult to take the giant step back and look at what's going on here from that meta-viewpoint, but so valuable if we're able to do so.</p>
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If we're able to disengage from the "which college they end up at" result frenzy
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Bingo. And, I have to sadly say that I have developed a far worse case of this syndrome as we face the "forced transfer" process than I ever had last year for freshman admissions. I am trying hard to control it, to talk sense to myself, but I am not sure whence it came. I <em>do</em> know that I was not on cc during the admissions process last year, only after DS acceptance was in. But I can't seem to go cold turkey, even if cc is what is feeding my anxiety. :( "All college admissions all the time" is not a good parental motto.</p>
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"All college admissions all the time" is not a good parental motto.
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<p>jmmom, that is pretty funny.</p>
<p>I think it's a great idea to let kids own this process. But I wonder about all the kids (OK - let me just say it - boys) who would be left lying on the couch playing Doom a year or two later? ;)</p>