<p>Son was accepted to first choice EA. No merit awarded. Very little FA. We're willing to take on loans and pay them off for him over time. 2 kids in college; lost everything in the real estate crash. The problem is, now we have high salaries but we are rebuilding everything. Any ideas would be so greatly appreciated.</p>
<p>Any ideas would be so greatly appreciated.</p>
<p>You may need to have your children attend cheaper schools. Did your current college-bound child apply to any affordable schools?</p>
<p>Paying/Borrowing $200k for each of your two kids ($400k total) may be affordable or not, depending on how high those high incomes are. That seems like a lot of money to spend/borrow unless there are college savings accts to lower the amounts.</p>
<p>Did you try any of the Net Price Calculators on the schools’ websites?</p>
<p>Yes both sons have generous merit scholarships elsewhere. But one’s heart is set on the reach he got into and worked so hard for. He so deserves it, and it isn’t any fault of his we had to spend our savings just to live when my husband’s industry collapsed. Yes, we can pay off those loans in time. We just have no liquidity at all now.</p>
<p>“He so deserves it, and it isn’t any fault of his we had to spend our savings just to live when my husband’s industry collapsed.”</p>
<p>He also earned that generous merit scholarship with his hard work, so you needn’t feel that the only family option is loading up on debt for his dream school. What’s to say that the industries that the parents are in won’t collapse again? or that they will continue to recover as quickly as you hope?</p>
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<p>It’s totally up to you if you want to do this, it’s your money, your debt. However, a child doesn’t “deserve” this no matter how hard they work. There are literally thousands and thousands of kids who work very hard in school, get amazing super stats, and they have to go where it’s affordable. The dream is the future career, not 4 years of college.</p>
<p>Very good points and things to ponder, thank you. I’m obviously operating from mommy guilt rather than rationale. It doesn’t help that his dream school is ranked #1 for his major. Of course that’s why he didn’t get merit there. Perhaps being a big fish in a smaller sea will be better for him, and it will be better financially for sure. I appreciate you helping me see this.</p>
<p>Also, keep in mind that many/most kids change their majors once in college, so picking a school for that reason can end up being moot. </p>
<p>Also, remember that very few careers require a student to attend certain undergrads. If he were interested in Wall St finance/banking then a tippy top undergrad may be needed, but most careers can be successfully pursued after graduating from hundreds of different schools. </p>
<p>In another thread, it sounds like you’re instate for Calif. Are any of those schools more affordable? What is his major/future career?</p>
<p>anyone does have recos about how to ask for more aid, please do let us know.</p>
<p>For Fordham? What is your EFC? (will your EFC go up a lot next year because of 2013 high income??)</p>
<p>Are your son’s Math + CR SAT scores very high for the school…like a 1480+? </p>
<p>How much more do you need? What was he awarded so far?</p>
<p>@dodgersmom I just allowed PMs. Good idea to start my own thread. I’ll attempt that now. Wish me luck!</p>
<p>We have #1 son in college on a decent merit scholarship with some financial aid. He also holds a job and pays a portion of his expenses. #2 son is a HS senior, also with a job, who has thus far been accepted at 8/8 private schools and offered merit–ranging from a full ride at his very last choice to about 50% at others. He is in the top 10% of his class and has good test scores and outstanding EC’s but no other major hooks. Murphy’s law, son #2’s was accepted EA at his first choice, but no merit was awarded as this was his highest reach. We discovered yesterday we will get little FA from his first choice. Why? Because combined, our 1-year old salaries are too high. </p>
<p>However, in 2008, we lost almost everything in the real estate crash, including my husband’s job, for 3 years. I was a SAHM who went back to work full time to keep our house. DH also had a major medical event during that time, and our debt on that is very high. We are now getting back on our feet, but we completely depleted all college, retirement and savings just trying to keep a roof over our kids’ heads. We never took a dime of public assistance or mortgage bailout and we are committed to climbing back up to stability. As I said in another forum, son #2 has worked so hard and deserves this school. It is ranked #1 in his major, which some people say doesn’t matter, but several recruiters in this field have told us differently. He is set on this major and has been for years. It’s his job now, even.</p>
<p>This is the kid who suffered the worst but stepped up the most during our economic struggles, none of which were his fault. I know I am working off major mommy guilt here, but is there any way to get more aid given our history? I included this story in the CSS/FAFSA explanations, to no avail. Loans would be OK, and we would pay them over time, but that wasn’t even offered. Any advice would be so helpful; he applied to one in-state university (a great one!) and has been accepted, but it doesn’t have his major. He seems seems to have little interest in the other 7 schools, though I know he would “take on for the team” if asked. I just don’t want to ask him to. Any advice on getting past this mommy guilt for this would be appreciated, too. It’s a tough one. Thank you all in advance for being nice.</p>
<p>Mommy guilt can be a biggie, but seriously, you can work thru this. :)</p>
<p>What is his major and career interest?</p>
<p>What school is this? </p>
<p>What other schools has he been accepted to and what is the net cost at those.</p>
<p>How much are you comfortably able to pay each year out of current income for this child’s college costs.</p>
<p>If you have already been in a position of significant financial loss, please do not be “guilted” into taking on a high level of loans.</p>
<p>As noted, your student’s hard work earned them a high school diploma, not an unlimited amount of money from you to support college costs. Presumably your student applied to schools where he/she would attend if accepted. If a school is unaffordable, so be it.</p>
<p>There are many students every year who can’t attend a very expensive school for many different reasons (job loss, high medical expenses, some other financial family crisis).</p>
<p>I personally think college is a good time for students to learn the meaning of “living within your means”.</p>
<p>The good news is he has excellent grades and in the top 10% in class. Unfortunely stuff happens (job loss, medical issues, etc.) often at the worse time (right before college). The other good news is you are starting to get back on your feet. </p>
<p>My best advice would be to create a spreadsheet listing all of the colleges with their COA and then deducting merit aid and any other aid you may have received. This way you can see what each school will actually cost you. Also another thing you could do is make another sheet rating each school based on factors like cost, size, social scene, etc. Look into each college deeper like what classes are required to graduate and different things like that.</p>
<p>If you are willing to borrow, PLUS is available as are private loans, neither options that I would recommend without thinking long and hard about the financial ramifications and long term commitments that taking out those amounts would entail. You already saw w what happens when one is caught in a burst financial “bubble”, and those who have been eyeing the situation are saying that these college loans are going to be the next bust. But, yes, there would be loans available if that is the route you want to take.</p>
<p>Since your sons, particularly this one has seen the traumas of what a financial fall can do, my personal opinion would be that you would want to spare them a repeat of what happened to you as much as you can, by getting your old age finances in good shape. Now that you have incomes that allow a living wage, and pay off of old debts, a priority would be stockpiling for the next era of your lives and making it as independent of your sons’. It is quite a gift to have parents who are set and not in a state of financial uncertainty. I’d pick that anyday over a first choice college, especially after experiencing those stresses already. </p>
<p>I’m glad your son has an array of choices, and that some of them are affordable. I can tell you that my son didn’t even give the full price $60K a year schools even a glance as he knew they were out of range price wise.</p>
<p>Be aware that the bit of financial aid that is offered to your second may be taking into account that there will be two in college (if that is indeed the case) next year, but will sky rocket when your EFC doubles when S1 graduates.</p>
<p>Thank you. Honestly, I’m so in the weeds, I never looked at this as a teachable moment. We could teach him to live within his (our) current means; or we could teach him that he has control over his destiny by the efforts he’s made to get the scholarships he’s earned. I’m an intelligent person, I swear, but this hasn’t occurred to me. I just so want to give him what he wants, as he hasn’t had it in awhile. What you’re telling me is just what we taught him when he was 2 or 4 or 10—just because you want it doesn’t mean you can have it. Mind you, he’s not asking. He knows good and well he’ll probably have to go to another school (no problem, his backups with merit are places like Texas, Purdue, Ohio State, SMU, etc. ie not shabby).</p>
<p>@cpt of the house-Do you have more info on an impending college loan bust?</p>
<p>OP…we were in a similar situation financially. Only we looked at prices prior to applications. My sons dream school would have been 65/ year. And he was not likely to get merit. </p>
<p>Or he could attend a school with a great program, and very generous merit. </p>
<p>We discussed the prices, and told him that if he REALLY wanted to attend his dream school, we would find a way to pay for it, but that would mean major debt for us, including loss of a huge amount of our retirement. So he would either have to agree to take care of us the rest if our lives, or pay us back :)</p>
<p>When he looked at the financial side of it himself, he thought it was completely ridiculous to spend 65 thousand / year on college when he had other options. And graduating debt free was very appealing to him. </p>
<p>As he said, “I’d also rather be driving a Bughati than a 2004 Mazda. But my Mazda gets me where I want to go.”</p>
<p>Your son may surprise you if you have that talk with him. It may not be his “dream” school, but you don’t want to set up his “dream” to turn into a nightmare either. </p>
<p>Sent from my DROID RAZR using CC</p>
<p>Thanks @vlines. Sage advice. Even his guidance counselor told him he truly never thought he’d get into Michigan, especially early admit. So this is a situation we never expected to face. The other places are affordable with merit. Yes, UM is his Bugatti!</p>
<p>I definitely sympathize with the desire to give your son the school he worked so hard for. Our son had been dreaming of and planning to go to his dream college since 7 th grade. And worked very hard since that time to be eligible for the school. </p>
<p>Yea, mom guilt still gets to me.</p>
<p>Luckily, he is happy where he is.</p>
<p>I dream of living in a bigger, newer house, and I could afford it … but I live in a perfectly fine house that I own free and clear. I am not willing to trade financial stability for a mortgage that will last until and perhaps into retirement. </p>
<p>UM is a fine school . However, I am willing to bet that your son’s other choices will serve him perfectly well and will leave your family less vulnerable to financial problems.</p>
<p>Ok…it’s UMich. (BTW…UMich is more costly for jr and sr years).</p>
<p>What is his major? Career interest?</p>
<p>With Purdue, Texas and others with merit, it seems hard to imagine that UMich would be that much better. </p>
<p>BTW…what were the merit offers from Purdue, OSU, and UT?</p>
<p>What school offered the free ride?</p>
<p>What you’re telling me is just what we taught him when he was 2 or 4 or 10—just because you want it doesn’t mean you can have it.</p>
<p>Yup! (but you already knew that… 
)</p>
<p>Purdue is a great school!! And even though I am from Michigan, I can admit that OSU is also a very good school. I wouldn’t hesitate to pick either of those if they were less costly than UM. I am assuming the student is interested in engineering or sciences …</p>