<p>On these boards there are frequent threads on the importance, or lack thereof, of elite college attendance, etc, on ultimate success. Earlier this year I was asked to give a talk encouraging parents of young children to just "back off" and give their kids time to dream and play. This was a talk at an International school in an Asian city...All of these parents of elementary and middle school kids have bought into the idea that there is only one measure of success- Ivy or equivalent admissions, and the prepping starts as 3 year olds...at this school 1/3 of the kids take the SAT's as 6th graders to qualify for CTY..etc., all the 8th graders do SAT prep and many are burnt out by 10th. </p>
<p>In anticipation of this talk (which evidently I was qualified to give and percieved to be likely to be successful with because of my academic credentials-- they figured the parents would listen to me)... I referenced my most useful source, my mother-in-law. For frame of reference, she was an AP Calculus teacher at a DC suburban school for 15 years and statistically among the most successful in the country. She has an anecdote for every school related situation which presents the topic in immediate clarity. Here is what she said about "success."</p>
<p>"It was easy as a teacher to see which students were going to be successful people professionally. Given a certain level of intelligence and learning, *it was the whole package that counted... empathy, social awareness, looks(undeniably true), sense of humor and play.....</p>
<p>Then there is...."The B student will hire the A student" </p>
<p>and finally, when all else fails (for Cheers)..."Throw money at the problem"</p>
<p>I am playing the final card next week and taking son #2 to visit 3 schools (I hope only 3). It will be a long trip(24 hours and 12 time zones)..but there is one big decision, another secondary one, and they can only be made in real time...</p>