I’m moving into my dorm in 9 days. The college I’m going to is 5 hours away from home. Today me and my mom were trying to figure out how I’m going to fit all of my dorm stuff into the car and I said why don’t we just take 2 cars because I don’t think all of my stuff is going to fit into one. She then said I only want to take one car because I don’t think I’m going to be able to drive back since I’ll be a wreck. She hasn’t been emotional at all until now and now I feel really bad. My mom never cries. I don’t want to see her cry either. We’re both also extremely close. When I was applying to colleges she wanted me to apply to colleges close to home and the college that I ended up picking was the furthest away. I’m now starting to realize that I’m actually leaving and I won’t be back home until Thanksgiving break. I have never been away from my family for longer than a day. I’m excited, nervous, and scared all at the same time. I don’t know what I’m going to do when my family has to leave me at my new college. I don’t know if I should cry or not. I don’t know if any of my family is going to cry. I’m sorta freaking out right now. Any advice?
Here’s one idea that has helped me with the pre move in nerves. Go into a different room and call your mom. We use Skype, but any communication method will work. Just practicing how you will stay in touch can help reassure you that you can contact each other.
And crying is not a bad thing. It is a HUGE adjustment, after all.
Don’t be afraid to cry. My dad did when he left yesterday. It’s ok, and I highly doubt you will be the only one. Yes, practice Skype and Google hangouts and other such things you can use to stay connected. I did that a lot the few days before I left. You’ve got this!
I don’t know about the stuff fitting in the car… we have a Suburban and I didn’t bring a lot of stuff. But where there’s a will there’s a way!
Let’s talk about crying.
I’m a big crier. It’s how I deal with stress. I don’t punch walls, I don’t get drunk, I have a good, therapeutic cry. It’s healthy, and I feel better afterwards.
So joke with mom about how you’ll both cry. Invest in a gift for her that you give her as she leaves: a heartfelt letter of thanks to your parents for all they’ve done for you and a wrapped box of tissues.
Know that being nervous about leaving doesn’t mean you’re not ready to leave. It’s just a normal human reaction to change. You both survived the first day of kindergarten, and you’ll both survive this “first” as well.
Tears or no tears.
You will be fine. It is ok to cry. It’s ok for mom to cry.
I rarely cry but I did when I dropped each kid off at a dorm. We spent a few hours together, and then there were evening events for the kids. Enjoy it. It’s all a transition. Mom isn’t going anywhere and your room will still be there.
Honestly, I’m pretty close to my family, but I adjusted pretty quickly. We skyped about once a week, texted decently often, etc. I’m 800 miles away so I can’t really come home for thanksgiving either. Since I spent Spring Break on a trip, I didn’t see them from January until June. It’s weird, but you gotta do it eventually. 5 hours isn’t that bad, if they want to come up for parents weekend or something like that either.
Don’t be afraid, you are going to college to better yourself. There’s something you liked to make you pick this college over the rest, right? You’ll be fine. Crying is normal. I cried so much on the day I got dropped off for college, like it was bad. 5 hours isn’t too bad, I know people that went to college way further away than that. You can always visit. When classes start, I’m sure you’ll realize your glad your there!