<p>It isn't exactly as though you cannot get a great education at a public university.</p>
<p>I can't see the default-as-a-protest-against-poor-education when we have so many excellent public colleges (and lower tier colleges offering generous FA and merit scholarships). That argument holds no water.</p>
<p>out local flagship state school, UIUC, turns away a lot of people - too many applicants. So we have to look to other states, private or public. In all cases, the cost of in-state public, out of state public, or private schools, are like buying a house, or at least a condo in a nice area, for each kid over 4 yrs.</p>
<p>College tuition at both publics and privates has been increasing a WAY OVER the rate of inflation over the last what, decade, decade and a half?</p>
<p>My salary during that time has gone up AT BEST the inflation rate. Many yrs it had been at 0 pct. I am solidly middle class, too.</p>
<p>In short, it is pretty hard to afford college for most of the country, and college is necessary for this country to compete in a global economy.</p>
<p>There is never an excuse to go back on a debt promise without making a good faith effort to pay it back. There are so many options other than a $45K a year private college. Living at home for two years, going to CC, then transferring to flagship? I'm sure if one thinks out of the box, they can come up with a better plan than going to their dream school cadillac-of-colleges, and then defaulting on the loans.</p>
<p>Illinois has more than one state school. If a student can't get into ANY four-year school in his/her state system, then that's usually a decent indication that the student is not prepared for the rigors of a four-year school. (Not always, but often, I would think.) There's always community college, as doubleplay suggested. There are many, many ways to get educated in this country, and most of them don't involve $45K per year.</p>
<p>The OP, by the way, did not lack affordable options-- her daughter had a full ride at another school. She's not complaining about "the system" or suggesting that these loans are unfair.</p>
<p>The durbin comments and the inflation and the cost of college comments were intended to be a bit more general and not precisely on OP's scenario. I forgot she had a free ride at a school option number 2.</p>
<p>Yes, there are other state schools in ILLinois besides the flagship. But what about the importance of 'fit' that is talked about so much, both here in CC forum, as well as in other discourse on college? Isn't 'fit' very important?</p>
<p>What if the applicant would 'get lost' in a bigger school, which all state schools must be of necessity? Getting lost means not the best, most efficient way of doing education. It is wasterful and not productive. Once size does not fit all, but that is how the state public school system is set up.</p>
<p>Part of "fit" is financial impact.
If the financial data will result in future choices for the student and others in her family being narrowed or perhaps even eliminated- than that school- no matter how popular of a brand name- isn't a good " fit".</p>
<p>While some students may do better in a smaller environment than a larger university- a student who has been successful competing against others for a slot at a top LAC ( where admit rates are below 30%), is not likely to be unable to adapt to another type of environment, unless the acceptance at the top school was a * fluke*.</p>
<p>
[quote]
You know, the OP made it pretty clear that this was a painful subject for her in lots of ways and asked more than once that the discussion be confined to the financial consequences around either taking over the loans, not taking them over, or whatever and now I am reading posts about personality disorders?</p>
<p>I am kind of shocked at the insensitivity bordering on cruelty from some of the posters speculating about something that the OP has asked not be hashed out.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>I respectfully disagree. The OP chose to post many aspects of the back story which were completely unnecessary if the only question was about the effects on her credit if she co-signed a loan and the main obligor defaults.</p>
<p>It is unfair and unreasonable to post that kind of information and not expect a response that takes it into consideration. Anyway, it's pretty obvious that the real problem here is not $1000 per month. The real problem is the child's issues and their effect on her family.</p>
<p>My opinion on the real problem is that there is a good chance the child's issues will not go away and that the parents should consider this in addressing the problem. I don't see this as "hectoring," but maybe you were referring to a different poster.</p>
<p>To all:
I purposely did not answer many of your questions because I want to preserve my anonymity.</p>
<p>I purposely did not disclose whether or not the child in question graduated college or not. This was not a question about what to do with the child. This was a question about loan repayment and credit. And an ambivalent, ambiguous question about how much I want to see my child hurt vs what sort of life lessons I am teaching her if or when I pay back the loans.</p>
<p>That is has spiraled does not surprise me.</p>
<p>Yes, I posted a while back about MIT. Does it surprise anyone that I may have more than one child? I also re-read that post, and noticed that I wrote it in the first person, which does not surprise me. You see, in order to protect my anonymity, I have more than one user id. And I always change details about myself and my family, the number of children that I have, and their genders. I disclosed that fact in the first paragraph of this post.</p>
<p>Most of all, I am really, really sorry about what I wrote about my "pride and joy". It was wrong. The best that I can say is that I did discuss this with a therapist, who told me that it is OK to feel proud of this child's accomplishments. It does not diminish, in any way, the love or concern that I feel for his or her siblings.</p>
<p>For those of you who speculated about the additional monthly expenses of around $1,000 a month ... do you know how much health insurance costs for an individual that is not a part of a group? Or how hard it is to attain? Of that $1,000, figure in the cost of health insurance, and from there, extrapolate to the monthly cost of the loan. A little math will tell you that 1) Its the combined expense that is high and 2) The health insurance is a large chunk of that expense. The loans are not as large part of the expense as some you are speculating.</p>
<p>I thank those of you that offered me information about loans and credit. To the others, I thank you for your support. This is a painful problem that goes far beyond money, but the (unsuccessful) idea was to limit scope of the thread to just that.</p>
<p>Please note the following from the Terms of Service:
[quote]
Registration and Your Identity. CollegeConfidential.com seeks to maximize the utility of its forum to its members and visitors, and does not knowingly allow members to misrepresent themselves. Multiple registrations by the same individual without written permission from CollegeConfidential.com are not allowed. Re-registration by individuals who have been banned or denied posting privileges in the past is not allowed. Individuals who misrepresent themselves (e.g., posing as a student or parent when they are not, claiming a false affiliation with a college, etc.), or who register with multiple identities, or who re-register after having been banned, will be reported to the abuse department of their internet and/or email service provider and may be subject to civil or criminal action depending on the nature of their violation.
[/quote]
We mods do appreciate that some posters may on occasion wish to address a sensitive situation without linking it to their ID. On such occasions we do allow another registration. We were aware, through our system, of this "multi" and made a decision not to intervene in this case as we appreciated the concern about anonymity. However, we do want all posters to be aware that they should request permission for any additional registration.
Thanks for your cooperation.</p>
<p>^
Sorry, I didn't know that.</p>
<p>^^^Not a big problem, motherwise, but when you posted about the multis we thought we should call the attention of other posters/readers to the rules.</p>
<p>We have had other similar situations; often the poster will explain in the first post "I am posting under another ID in order to discuss this sensitive situation." We try to be understanding, rather than rigid, in such cases.</p>
<p>This comment is primarily for future students. People should pay their debts and not expect others to cover the costs of education that the (the student) agreed to cover. In the end a person is only as good as their word..No excuses.</p>
<p>Re student loans and bankruptcy, student loans are non-dischargable in bankruptcy except under undue hardship conditions.</p>
<p>"Student loans are no longer dischargeable in bankruptcy just because they have been in pay status for a given period of time. The only way the loan can be discharged is by proving that repayment of the loan will create an undue hardship on the debtor/borrower and his family. </p>
<p>This standard is generally interpreted to mean that the debtor cannot maintain a minimally adequate standard of living and repay the loan. It usually requires a showing that the conditions that make repayment a hardship are unlikely to improve substantially over time. "</p>
<p>Since we're all indulging in higher education, ie, the life of the mind, let me ask the logical other half of the question...</p>
<p>...and if a student, or parent, if co-signing, does not meet the financial duress std from the last poster, and the debt is not paid...</p>
<p>...what happens then?</p>
<p><em>bad credit rating for student and parents... forever (cannot *ever</em> be discharged)?</p>
<p>*jail?</p>
<p>if either of the above, WOW!</p>
<p>Reminds me of the recent incident in China where some bureacrat who was taking bribes was executed.</p>
<p>Bad credit rating for as long as the loan remains unpaid, plus a certain number of years thereafter.</p>
<p>No jail - we've done away with debtors prison. But it is possible for lenders to go to court and get an order of garnishment of wages - they take the loan payments off the top of your paycheck.</p>
<p>I don't remember anyone mentioning this, but another good reason not to default on one's educational loans: employers frequently check one's credit ratings these days. Failure to pay loans/bankruptcy filing would not impress a potential employer. Kind of a Catch-22, I know, but there it is.</p>
<p>Another reason defaulting is bad (besides the obvious) is that agencies will call everybody with your last name, your relatives, your school or work, and hunt you down for years to come. Having been on the receiving end of these bothersome calls, I was tempted to just turn in the offender to make the harassment stop!</p>
<p>Paying your debts on time preserves your credit rating. It's good business. But making loan payments at the expense of eating, feeding your children, and maintaining a safe environment for your family (i.e., not living on the street) strikes me as a poor ethical choice. Been there. If you haven't, don't judge.</p>
<p>I agree with celloguy- credit ratings really affect so much- not just your ability to get future credit- but jobs and ins.</p>
<p>I would agree that insuring you have income for food & shelter ethically has priority over making loan payments- but all the more reason to carefully consider consequences before taking out loans-</p>
<p>Bad credit rating, any tax refunds will be used to pay the debt, you'll be expected to pay what you can. From one friend I know who has struggled with her student loans, the government is willing to defer for hardship reasons. No discharge except for "undue" hardship...</p>
<p>If the government made it easy to discharge the school loan debt in bankruptcy, I'm sure there would be an alarming number of people who would take out student loans and declare bankruptcy as soon as they finish school.</p>
<p>The whole system of student loans would crumble and a lot of people wouldn't be able to be helped because of the bad apples.</p>