<p>To those defending him: No. I will judge him how I see fit since he’s in my living space. Maybe he shouldn’t have assaulted or possibly raped someone if he wants people to not judge him based on that. I have PTSD already, I will not let anyone in my apt that has a history of attacking other people. </p>
<p>I met with housing today, they’re going to try to separate my roommate and I. They just need to find a place</p>
<p>Very wise ducky-everyone has the right to feel safe in the own home. I am so glad you acted quickly.</p>
<p>To those defending him: No. I will judge him how I see fit since he’s in my living space. Maybe he shouldn’t have assaulted or possibly raped someone if he wants people to not judge him based on that. I have PTSD already, I will not let anyone in my apt that has a history of attacking other people. </p>
<p>I met with housing today, they’re going to do a roommate mediation/contract. We really need to talk because I found out she told him about my PTSD which was entirely inappropriate.</p>
<p>All I’m trying to say is that everyone ****s up once and a while, and you really can’t say whether it was rape or not. And yes, it is messed up to go to ResLife, both you and your roommate BOTH payed for the room, if you can’t deal with other people in your space, maybe you should have bought your own house. </p>
<p>It does not matter if he was convicted of assault, or at least it shouldn’t. I’m sure you have secrets you would rather not be thrown out there and used against you.</p>
<p>DuckyCurtains - best of luck with this whole thing. I don’t get those who are saying you should just suck it up. Pure nonsense. You felt uncomfortable, told your roommate so, and she didn’t care. </p>
<p>Personally, I’m more concerned with how he reacted on the phone (ie his tone becoming nasty & threatening to sue you) than whether or not the charges brought against him were legit. It sounds like a very hollow threat, and it sounds like he probably has conditions in his parole that make it illegal for him to stay in a college apt like yours. </p>
<p>I’d imagine that your school has a policy that makes overnight guests (especially of the opposite gender) a no-no without prior permission from everyone in the room.</p>
<p>Make sure you’re never alone with this guy - if I were you and found him in my apt again (ie the roommate lets him in), I’d immediately call the cops/campus security. He might be innocent of everything he was accused of, but his threats are completely not acceptable.</p>
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Pure and total bs. She probably doesn’t have the money to “buy” a house as a college student.</p>
<p>The OP has every right to say no to an overnight guest at any time. And this is coming from me, a firm believer that roommates should be able to communicate and have overnight guests… If it does not negatively impact the other roommate. This guest CLEARLY is having a negative impact on the OP (she has mentioned anxiety issues/PTSD in this thread).</p>
<p>"All I’m trying to say is that everyone ****s up once and a while, and you really can’t say whether it was rape or not. And yes, it is messed up to go to ResLife, both you and your roommate BOTH payed for the room, if you can’t deal with other people in your space, maybe you should have bought your own house. </p>
<p>It does not matter if he was convicted of assault, or at least it shouldn’t. I’m sure you have secrets you would rather not be thrown out there and used against you."
-Davinitall</p>
<p>Translation : Anyone who doesn’t want to live( if hes around that often) with a violent criminal who recently was let out , needs to buy their own house . </p>
<p>HE DOESN’T have a right to be in the apartment , that’s it .</p>
<p>Personally I don’t do roomates since you can’t control other people regardless- the idiots at my last college would smoke weed in the dorms , even after seeing the cops run in and bust kids several times . For someone trying to stay out of trouble, your in for a very hard time with assigned roomates , this is more for guys since guys tend to do stupid/ illegal stuff .</p>
<p>Great post Johnson 181!!! Totally agree. Unfortunately some things can happen that you can’t just “undo” so much better to be careful and take necessary precautions.</p>
<p>Agree with Johnson & in the meantime, I’d tell housing that I am very concerned about the room mate and felon friend. IF campus security is called if the felon is ever seen in the apartment, it will be up to him to figure out how to deal with parole officer because a report will likely be filed. I would NOT be comfortable in the situation Ducky describes and she does NOT have to justify it to anyone why she doesn’t want someone who has served time for assault (charge reduced from rape) in her apartment. I would have campus security on speed dial.</p>
<p>How about an update Ducky? I am a bit worried about you!</p>
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<p>Are you the guy or something? It’s pretty naive and childlike for her to just not worry about it and smile and go, “It’s okay. We all mess up.” The OP is obviously a chick, so it’s way more important for her to be smart about not having possible rapists in her space. She can’t just knock out some teeth. Sounds like you’re obviously the type of guy that lets people walk all over you. There’s just some **** you just don’t have to put up with just because the other person is paying.</p>
<p>OP, I’m guessing you don’t live in one of the very few states that allow concealed carry, and then are also comfortable with carrying a firearm. I highly recommend you have some form of personal self-defense. Not just by his criminal history, but the stuff you talk about, this guy sounds like a ■■■■■■. A lot of schools allow pocket knives with a certain blade length. Have pepper spray at the very least. Please.</p>