I spent a decent amount of time writing this UC application essay, and I’m conflicted if it’s actually good or not. Some people have told me the essay is great, while others told me that it needs a lot of work. I know it’s a lot of work to read this essay, so don’t feel obliged to respond. All I need answered is areas of the essay that need improvement, and a general rating of how good the essay is.
- What would you say is your greatest talent or skill? How have you developed and demonstrated that talent over time?
Standing outside on a hot summer day, I tensed in anticipation, waiting for the race to begin. Many people were surrounding me and my competitors, intensely watching. I knew that if I pushed myself hard enough, I could do it. As I heard the whistle blow, I was off! I quickly looked down and began, interpreting the flashes of colors in my hands as my fingers nimbly turned each side of the Rubik’s cube. As I got closer to finishing, the more algorithms I had to recall from memory, and the harder I had to push myself. As I got to the final move, I threw down my now completed Rubik’s cube and victoriously shouted “Done!” I had won, with a new best time of twenty seconds. << Maybe improve the 2nd half of paragraph
A few months prior to this competition, I was at my friend’s house watching him solve what I now know to be a Rubik’s cube. I was intrigued by the seemingly complex puzzle, and grew curious of how my friend was completing it so quickly. He gave me a basic explanation of how to solve it, but I craved a deeper understanding of the Rubik’s cube’s intricacies.
To do this, I began independently researching online on how to solve Rubik’s cubes. I watched tutorials after tutorials, writing notes on new strategies and perspectives. When I felt I was ready, I gathered all my notes together and began solving my Rubik’s cube. After following all my directions I’d gathered and a day of effort later, I had nearly reached the end. After doing the final step to solve it, I… messed up. I was crushed by this failure, but I persevered. After two more days of multiple failed attempts, I independently solved the Rubik’s cube for the first time ever. It was only a few months later that I got my best time of twenty seconds. << Maybe remove this to get below limit
While solving a Rubik’s cube was not a unique talent that I was born with, it was instead a skill that I worked extremely hard to refine. My interest in Rubik’s cubes have made me stop asking “How does that work?” and instead start to ask “How can I learn how that works?”