Necessary life skills before leaving home

<p>I like Ramen, too! Anyway, I do get a kick out of these threads but I have to admit mine were more like Granipc by the time they left for college. One item that hasn’t been mentioned is taking shirts to the dry cleaner. I remember my oldest asking me about age 16 where the shirts went to get all nice and pressed better than I did. Yikes, the cleaners. It’s also helpful for them to know this so they don’t put wool sweaters in the dryer. I made sure S2 and S3 knew about the dry cleaners.</p>

<p>My H laughs because HE discovered around age 18 that many dry cleaners have laundry service. He was still taking his clothes in for laundry service when I met him at age 28. Which isn’t real funny when you see how DIRTY college washing machines are and how FULL the kids stuff them. I was shocked when my S1 came home for his first Christmas with obviously freshly washed clothes and everything white was dingy gray. I grabbed all his t-shirts and rewashed and the wash water was unbelievably dirty.</p>

<p>Harvest: The DD would have no idea what an S on my chest and cape meant, even with the Christopher Reeves movies - before her time.</p>

<p>My WW (wonderful wife) has no concept of how to change a tire, jump start the car, etc. We have AAA which allows me some piece of mind. We live in NJ, so she doesn’t even have to know how to pump gas.</p>

<p>I’m really surprised by how many people use dry cleaners. Is that a big city thing? I don’t even know where the nearest dry cleaners are! Nearly everything can be washed at home-even wool sweaters-you use delicate settings, Woolite-type soap and lay them out to dry. Other things you hang dry. There is an at-home dry cleaning product Dryell, that H uses for his suit jackets, but all of his shirts are wrinkle-free, wash and wear-he doesn’t send things to the cleaners either. I have never ruined a piece of clothing in this way. I did once shrink a rayon jacket but that’s because I put it in the dryer and it needed to hang dry.</p>

<p>Nope, small town here and one dry cleaner (who’ll do laundry) My oldest son’s college town had 2500 residents and 2 dry cleaners (who both do laundry).</p>

<p>D called me one frigid Sunday morning saying that she waited for 30 minutes on a commuter train platform in the middle of the downtown of a faraway city and still no train. I looked up the schedule and found it doesn’t run on Sundays. I told her to get out and hail a cab. She told me that she didn’t know how to do that. I explained that you stand on the side of a street, stick your hand up, wait for a cab to go by and look the driver in the eye. She was still nervous about doing that so I said that I’ll look for a nearby hotel that she can walk to, I’ll call her back, and that she can get the cab from there. By the time I called back, she was in a cab. </p>

<p>SHE FIGURED IT OUT! </p>

<p>It was a proud moment!</p>

<p>To be honest, I wouldn’t know how to jump a car or change a tire. Learned but since I’ve never needed either, I forgot. </p>

<p>I also don’t own any clothes that require dry cleaning. In my 22 years, I think my mom has had maybe a half dozen things dry cleaned? Know what to do if need be though.</p>

<p>Romanig…Positive to positive, negative to ground (I taught all the boys…my husband just thought they came out of the uterus knowing this.)</p>

<p>I have never changed a tire on my own or jumped a car on my own. I do have AAA and am quite content to call them and let them do either or both, as needed. This has worked well for me for over 30+ years. Different cars have different jacks in any case. Have been with H & assisted when he has changed tires when he was driving but not done it myself. Doubt either of our kids have done either of these things alone either, but we ALL have AAA memberships and are fine with letting them earn the dues.</p>

<p>This one is for kids going to school in Texas… Make sure they learn how to 2 Step (dance).
Hubby taught D before she left and it has been a much needed skill ;)</p>

<p>S texted from laundry, wasn’t sure how to use the machines there. FYI if you do end up giving instructions by text, make sure the last one is MAKE SURE YOU KNOW WHERE PHONE IS WHEN YOU START THE MACHINE. I am always afraid of this myself at home…</p>

<p>Had a friend whose son thought his sports jacket could be washed. Another thing you might want to advise is what DOES NOT go in the machine.</p>

<p>Yet another friend said her daughter never learned to read a numerical clock.</p>

<p>One last thing…those who have daughters. At 17 or even into early 20s they don’t seem to yet have that instinct to feel when something might not be appropriate from figures of authority (male teachers and employers at interviews/office meetings etc). They do not get that vibe that there is something else someone may want when they ask to meet at a restaurant or bar instead of a more formal setting, or ask for a phone number…hard to teach, but something that constantly needs to be enforced.</p>

<p>AAA is great-we have it, S has it, and it’s saved our bacon more than once. BUT, they don’t have service everywhere, and more than once they’ve taken so long to respond that someone was able to help us out long before they arrived. We learned the hard way that it’s a good backup but no substitute for knowing what to do on your own. I have changed a tire, I have jumped cars (usually helping my kids with their less-than-great cars). I have helped someone tow a car out of a snowbank (trust me, there was no AAA within many miles). I have push-started a manual car. </p>

<p>I guess a lot of these skills can be farmed out if you live in the right place and have that kind of disposable income, I’d rather not be beholden to the whims of others when there are simple things I can do to take care of myself.</p>

<p>Particularly in light of yet another shooting today at Lone Star College(?) in Texas, being attuned to ones surroundings and responding quickly and without panicking to any alerts that the school may issue. I also think it would be nice to send a quick email to the parents if something like this happens on campus so they know their children are safe.</p>

<p>MomFullofQs- I agree coaching our kids to be aware of their surroundings is very important. I do have to say though when you send your kid of to college it really doesn’t dawn on you that they might be faced with a shooting, bomb threat causing evacuation etc. One thing I did stress to D was to establish a place to go off campus and how to get there.</p>

<p>RushedMom, I agree. However, given weather conditions (tornadoes, hurricanes, snowstorms, earthquakes…) along with shootings, bomb threats, etc., it might have to be something we all consider spending some time on with our kids. I know we were only somewhat prepared for Hurricane Sandy this year but were NOT prepared for the power to be out for 8 days. There is only so much you can do, but even being vaguely aware of the possibility of something coming your way can’t be a bad thing.</p>

<p>Re. posts 90, 91 and 92:</p>

<p>It’s important to teach all kids, not just those going away to college, to trust their instincts and not be afraid to be rude if necessary for their own safety. I think we sometimes work against the best interests of our children in our attempts to “civilize” them. “Yes you do have to kiss smelly Aunt Mergatroid. Boozy Uncle Ebenezer? He’s just a little under the weather. Don’t run, don’t scream, don’t fight, don’t make other people uncomfortable in public. Listen to adults and do as they say.” We teach them to be polite and not make a fuss, when sometimes what they really should do is yell and scream and make a huge scene.</p>

<p>I was in a dorm once in the middle of the night during a tornado, during summer semester, and the only “adults” in the building were the student RAs. There were about 45 of us huddling in an interior hallway all night, and it apparently hadn’t occured to a SINGLE student in the group to have a flashlight or a radio. We were down there all night with no flashlights, no water, and no food. The RAs, who were in a different room most of the time than where they put us, were the only ones with a radio or cell reception to get any news on the storm. It was AWFUL. </p>

<p>It always strikes me as bizarre how few young people ever think that they might need certain things, like flashlights or thermometers. Almost nobody I knew had them.</p>

<p>"Recently he got a speeding ticket, had to go to downtown Houston from the 'burbs to take care of it. When he got to the court in his cargo shorts, he was told he could not go in front of the judge in shorts (he had previously called and they told him he would not have to see the judge, so he thought he would be fine in shorts)… did he call me or come home without taking care of it? Nope… he went and found a store that was open at 8:30 a.m., bought a pair of $12 pants, and went back to the court. Made me laugh, but was very proud he came up with his own solution… " - Granipc</p>

<p>Love this!</p>

<p>And about the dry cleaners - I live in the suburbs and bring my dad’s work shirts and suit in all the time. Besides that (and the occasional pea coat) we don’t bring things to the cleaners.</p>

<p>Concerning jumping cars - I’m 17 and just jumped my mom’s car this morning! That’s what happens when your brother leaves the lights on in your car overnight…</p>

<p>Lastly, words of wisdom from a girl who is hardly qualified to give words of wisdom, but I’ll say this anyway. Don’t fret too much about teaching your son everything there is to know about everything in college and life. Like a lot of the stories on this thread have shown, we all have lots of skills to figure out on our own. You don’t have to teach him everything, and anything they really can’t get the hang of they’ll ask you! So don’t worry about leaving him too unprepared. I’m sure he’ll be just fine with what you have taught him so far :)</p>

<p>carbs2, but wouldn’t you rather go to an event with a guy with a nicely lightly starched clean from the cleaners, smells good cotton shirt than a wrinkled one from the bottom of the closet? It only costs a buck or two and unless your dorm or apartment washers and dryers are free it’s a cheap spend.</p>

<p>Agree with the comments about taking care of yourself when sick – my freshman called me in a panic when he realized he had taken overlapping cold meds, and not sure if it was ok.</p>

<p>Also, where Health Services is on campus and how to make an appt.</p>