<p>Ok, the mom again with the son who wants to go to Eckerd and between us we will owe $20000 a year to do it. I am not working full time, neither is my husband so it will be a stretch to commit to much more than $5000 at least for the first year. We won't qualify for Parent Plus loan but could commit to a monthly payment. We just came off two years of boarding school for this son where we made many sacrifices that included renting our home out and really minimizing expenses by collaborating with others. It was actually a very good year with less! He can go to College of the Atlantic for almost nothing after some generous merit scholarships and grants. He liked it when he toured but since has felt like it is too small and socially and activity wise a bit challenged. He has come out of his shell and really enjoyed year round sports more than he had before. I worry that he will be unhappy and out of his element since I am the one largely swaying him to go "affordable". Anyone have personal experience with this school?? I also worry that he is more drawn to Eckerd for the beach life and less for his academic pursuits...nothing wrong with having fun, friends remind me, but he has the same price tag at Lewis and Clark in ORegon and I feel he might be in better company there. (ok so I'm a progressive health nut). I also wonder if he can transfer the credits from COA since the major is Human Ecology there and how that will work if he decides it isn't for him. Okay, so I'm probably way over thinking this. We didn't get final financial aid offers til a little over a week ago and his guidance counselors had swayed us away from reach schools like the little ivys where he might have found the need based help he is lacking at most of the schools. He seems to be leaning away from a gap year but would consider if there were something appealing and affordable in traveling to volunteer or such. He has a 3.4 GPA, solid but not stellar grades and a couple of AP classes, tons of volunteer and community service experience and some entrepreneurial stuff that seems to be working for him. His SATs were dismal at 490 and 500 and his ACT 19. We didn't know until year end that we would have a near 0 parent contibution on the FAFSA. So...he has to send deposit by Tuesday and is leaning toward College of the Atlantic only because my fears about huge loans were quite audible. I have worked so hard with him on his applications, essays, etc etc that I'm probably way to invested in the end result. He's a great kid...very sensitive and head on straight but at 17 he's a bit young emotionally. I know with every decision, there's an experience and that will be what it is...good, bad or indifferent it will be his.</p>
<p>Of the options remaining on the table, your family can only afford the College of the Atlantic.</p>
<p>Your son can go there.
Your son can take a gap year, work on his test scores and college list, and apply to places that your family can afford.
Your son can take a look around at affordable places that are still accepting applications (for example your local community college).
Your son can come up with a Plan B that doesn’t require a four year degree in the near future.</p>
<p>It really is that simple.</p>
<p>I know someone who is a graduate of C of The Atlantic. She is a very successful environmentalist with the NYS Dept of Env. Conservation. I had never heard of this school until I met her (her DH worked for mine.) She absolutely loved it but it was the perfect school for her and what she wanted to do professionally. She got a lot of hands on experience while there.</p>
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<p>Seconding this. I am a recent graduate whose parents allowed her to take on big student loans and you REALLY wouldn’t be doing your son any favors by letting him go to a school that isn’t affordable. You are borrowing from his future for the next 10+ years to pay for 4 years of school… it’s not worth it. These loans will make it difficult for him to afford a car or an apartment, it will be virtually impossible if not absolutely impossible to buy a house. He will have trouble saving money for a wedding… and the unfortunate reality is that he may have trouble finding a woman willing to marry into so much debt. </p>
<p>Even though college has been the end goal for many years now, once he finishes college he will have a whole new set of goals and ambitions, and spending too much money on the next four years will cripple him in his ability to reach for those goals. College isn’t the end of the line, you can’t gut yourself financially for four years in your late teens/early 20’s. There is too much of life to go AFTER that, that your son will need money for. Do not send him to a school you cannot afford. 20k/yr in debt is TOO MUCH. The next four years are not worth the rest of his life, and in four years getting an apartment, buying a car, and someday, settling down, are going to seem just as important to him as going to Eckerd is now, and you don’t want to have to tell him no then because you couldn’t now. NOW is the time to say no.</p>
<p>My daughter didn’t fully appreciate the luck of graduating debt-free from college until she saw just how limiting debt’s been to her friends. No ‘having a fun post-grad year in NYC,’ no fun trips before having to settle down to a serious job. No great apartments even with a good job because so much of the salary goes to paying college bills. Graduate school an additional scary burden. </p>
<p>Save him from all this. You both will be very happy you did five years from now</p>
<p>Thanks for simplifying the simple for me. I can surely complicate things with little effort!</p>
<p>With the grades you list and such difficulties with standardized tests it sounds like College of the Atlantic is a great gift. Especially when it makes him so hirable in his chosen field.</p>
<p>I would strongly urge you to support his attending. If he is unhappy after that, you can deal with that then.</p>
<p>All parents worry. You are worrying that he has been unduly influenced by your fears. But the reality is you are being instrumental in sending him to a school that will prepare him for the future he wants. There really is not downside here.</p>
<p>My D wanted to go to law school. After hearing me harp on cost, she chose a school with a very low COA. She borrowed for that year, and then after a year, decided that she hated law school. We are very grateful she saved $30K. She may have liked a different school better, but what if she hadn’t.</p>
<p>Bravo to your wonderful son for being accepted to a school that is perfect for his chosen major.</p>
<p>He hasn’t actually chosen a major but i’m sure a year at College of The Atlantic will make him more aware of environmental issues and that’s not a bad thing!</p>
<p>so…is it decided that your son will go to College of the Atlantic? He will have a great experience there.</p>
<p>Oh, and by the way, I think you need a hug, not a slap!</p>
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<p>Run, do not walk, to College of the Atlantic and count your blessings. That’s my advice.</p>
<p>do you have personal experience with COA or know someone who does?</p>
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<p>Wow . . . he’d consider a gap year if it’s “appealing and affordable”? Really? How about a gap year so you can lay your financial cards on the table, and he can rethink his college choices and get a JOB for the year!</p>
<p>You’ve gone above and beyond by paying for two years of boarding school and he’s paying you back by asking you now to fund (a) a college you can’t afford or (b) some overseas travel (so he can do “volunteer” work). I think it’s time you sat down with this kid and explained to him . . . in clear, simple language . . . what you can and cannot afford. If he’d not happy with COA, that’s fine. He can take a year off, get a job, study for the SAT or ACT (his choice), retest, and apply to a different set of schools.</p>
<p>I’m happy to jump on the COA bandwagon - I think it’s near miraculous that he’s gotten almost a free ride there. But if he decides he isn’t happy there, and thinks he was “forced” into it, is he going to come back and ask you to bail him out in a year? He won’t have a lot of options at that point - there’s almost no merit aid for transfer students.</p>
<p>I know you need a hug . . . but right now I’d like to slap you! It sounds like you’re the one who’s been doing all the heavy lifting . . . it’s time for him to carry his weight for a change. I know you want to help, but you can’t take care of him forever.</p>
<p>How much more expensive would it be for him to attend Clark University?</p>
<p>That has a much wider range in terms of potential fields of study.</p>
<p>Many moons ago I knew someone who graduated from COA. I ran into him some decades later and he was working in IT. He enjoyed his time there and it all worked out for him.</p>
<p>Not first-hand experience with COA, but we had a tenant a few years back who was a fairly recent graduate of COA. She was a bright, articulate and outgoing woman who spoke very highly of COA. She had just started as a new high school science teacher when she was renting from us.</p>
<p>Hi…Clark would cost around 13.</p>
<p>These questions amaze me.</p>
<p>You (OP) know the answer, you’re just looking for validation. Do the right thing; the foot comes down, S thanks you for having “will” and “resolve” 4 years from now, if not sooner.</p>
<p>Lewis and Clark is a good school. Congratulations on your decision.</p>
<p>Which school can you/he afford? Its really as simple as that. I’ve heard it suggested that you should never take on more in total student loan debt than you can expect to earn in your first year of employment. $20K/yr in loans at Eckerd or Lewis&Clark, for a student planning to major in Human Ecology is TOO MUCH. While I admit I am not familiar with College of the Atlantic, he obviously applied for a reason, and it must have appeal to him. Congrats and enjoy.</p>
<p>That’s a total loan burden of 80,000. Assuming a likely interest rate, and the usual ten years to pay it off, it will require around $890/month. For TEN YEARS. Assuming that half of the debt is his, he’ll need a starting salary around $50,000. Does that seem likely? And, are you prepared to come up with the other half - 450/month - which is $5,400/year for a decade?</p>