<p>Visionary, your son’s LAC may be listed on [Spectrum</a> U](<a href=“http://spectrumu.■■■■■■■■■■■■■%5DSpectrum”>http://spectrumu.■■■■■■■■■■■■■). And if not, look at the Thrive/Support Providers list - lots of options.</p>
<p>Good luck!</p>
<p>I’d be highly appreciative of information concerning which Midwest LACs are particularly receptive towards students w/Aspergers, as well as specific positive/negative feedback. Please message me if you’d like to maintain privacy. I’ve been compiling a list for DS.</p>
<p>OP: does your son presently receive any LD and/or Special Ed services in HS? Do you think he may need services at LAC? Please note that most colleges require a comprehensive psychological testing report that contains test data and conclusive diagnoses prior to providing accommodations. Report typically can’t be older than 2 to 5 years from submission date. These documentation requirements are typically outlined in the Student Services section. HS IEP doesn’t qualify as documentation of need.</p>
<p>OP: perhaps he already knows, particularly if he’s scientifically-minded and/or keeps up with newspapers and news magazines, because Aspergers/Autism is a frequent topic. But certainly sounds like a re-evaluation would benefit him (and you) towards preparation for college this Fall, because he does sound socially isolated as you describe him.</p>
<p>Yet another really good article recently appearing in the New York Times about the misdiagnosis of Aspergers. </p>
<p><a href=“Opinion | Asperger’s History of Overdiagnosis - The New York Times”>Opinion | Asperger’s History of Overdiagnosis - The New York Times;
<p>It does a good job of pointing to the downsides of labelling someone with Aspergers if they do not have it.</p>
<p>I’m also reminded that Warren Buffet openly credits Dale Carnegie to teaching him social skills and ‘changing his life’. This might be a fantastic idea for an otherwise functional, intelligent young adult who might need a serious boost in his social abilities (without it requiring a diagnosis and label).</p>
<p>PghMom, you’re creating a terrific website! Found DS’s LAC there, though they did not have a specific Asperger’s program. Thanks for doing this work for all the parents and students out there wondering where to turn!</p>
<p>higgins, yes DS was diagnosed in his with an LD in visual processing – very difficult for him to accept the necessity of this testing, even though his teachers initiated the eval, since he’s always been known as the brilliant one in class. But, where there are peaks, it seems there are often valleys! </p>
<p>starbright, thanks for posting this! DS had a lot of autism-specific behaviors as a young child – hand-flapping, rocking, perseveration, etc. – that led his evaluators to be very confident in his diagnosis. That said, most of these disappeared after four years of early and abundant therapies. (I remember being so exhausted at that time by all the driving – endless appointments with OT and PT and speech and social therapists! But it was worth it!) The fact that he has thrived in general except for his ongoing difficulty in forging close bonds with peers – is really a great gift. </p>
<p>I’m going to try to broach the subject with him this weekend. Thanks for your generous help and support, everyone! I’ll let you know how it goes!</p>
<p>higgins, we thought a small LAC would be the best place for Son and we were so very wrong. LACs want to develop the well rounded student and many kids with Aspergers are anything but. It would be much better for many kids to go to a school with few gen ed requirements. I understand that Grinnell has no ged ed requirements.</p>
<p>Also, we thought it would be great for our very bright son to go to school with other very bright students, so he chose a moderately selective LAC. Another mistake. No institutional academic assistance unless a student was on academic probation. It would have been better to have chosen a school with a tutoring center, math lab, writing lab, etc.</p>
<p>Wow, missypie, this makes me worried. How did your DS manage with his coursework? Was there any tutoring available to him? Sounds as though the college was not terribly responsive to the need for support.</p>
<p>Missypie: your posts regarding DS have been very helpful. Did DS’ LAC have a TRIO program? I’ve been tracking Midwest LACs that participate in federally-funded school retention program known as TRIO, which includes LD students in its mission. Both Knox and Beloit participate. Recently visited Knox; in conversation, one professor noted that Knox had “many” Asperger students and former president’s address in summer 2011 also noted a Knox student who manifested Asperger-like symptoms w/o him disclosing specific diagnoses.</p>
<p>Our DS attends a selective-enrollment college prep HS, and has tackled his executive functioning issues. No problem re: homework, assignments, class participation, etc. He does have current LD/Asperger documentation, and receives preferential seating and extended time for tests. Teachers are aware of diagnoses. He presents himself as “dorky” rather than “autistic”. We’re hoping that he will successfully do college as well, with those same accomodations. HS experience has been MUCH better for him than elementary school.</p>
<p>Visionary77: check into LD services ASAP for your DS’ intended LAC. I’d also suggest disclosing history, presenting documentation, and getting accomodations (including tutoring) lined-up BEFORE school-term begins. Better not to need the safety-net, then to discover too late that net is needed. Documentation requirements appear to be enforced. Some schools note “first come first serve” for availability of services, noting possibility that latecomers might not get services, and I’ve noted that certain services, particularly counseling services requiring psychologist/psychiatric services may be actually difficult to access. You may even want to research services/consultants available within outside community of that LAC, and perhaps establish some contact and/or prior relationship before school starts. These are certainly my goals, once he’s accepted and enrolled at specific college.</p>
<p>Read this, about a young man who was featured in a documentary re Aspergers:</p>
<p>I Had Asperger Syndrome. Briefly</p>
<p><a href=“http://www.nytimes.com/2012/02/01/opinion/i-had-asperger-syndrome-briefly.html[/url]”>http://www.nytimes.com/2012/02/01/opinion/i-had-asperger-syndrome-briefly.html</a></p>
<p>Maybe it’s better not to tell him?</p>
<p>Why does it matter that he was diagnosed with Asperger’s when he was 3, when he graduated shortly after? Do not live in the past! (You might, but don’t do that to your son. Be forward thinking.)</p>
<p>I think it’s great that he’s recognizing he has been so absorbed in his studies that he doesn’t have many friends now. He’s about the start a new place and he can change that behavior. Join clubs, have lunch or dinner with his roommate, at least once a day for the first few weeks. Find a study buddy. Tell him it might feel odd to do these things, but everyone is new. Not everyone goes to college to get drunk and do drugs. Encourage him to be sure those first weeks especially are a time to make friends and get out of his dorm. You will know if he’s doing that when he’s able to talk about other kids at school and things he’s done with them rather just about his classes.</p>
<p>TRiO is a great program (actually, it’s a set of programs - the relevant one here is called Student Support Program). The target population is 3-fold: low-income, first-gen college students, students with disabilities. Depending on how stretched the $ is, some schools give preference to students who are in more than one of those groups.</p>
<p>Visionary, thanks for the kind words. Higgins, Knox is getting added to my list!</p>
<p>Thank you so much for this thread!! What a relief to find other parents with the same concerns. </p>
<p>To introduce myself, my son, currently HS sophomore, was also diagnosed Aspergers, though no longer meets criteria because of extensive treatment when younger. He is still in a social skills group and on medication for anxiety. We have not shared his diagnosis with him, though now after reading this thread I will consider it. </p>
<p>He gets sad because he doesn’t have any truly good friends, but also needs a lot of alone time. There are a few kids he hangs out with at school and everyone there is nice to him, but he never gets invited to birthday parties, etc. We are involved in church and scouting, but he is on the periphery there also. </p>
<p>He is quite bright in the STEM subjects, and plans to go away to college, and I am terrified, despite thinking that the right school would be good for him. </p>
<p>He has been very specific that he wants a college with few general ed requirements. I was hoping that a math/science school would give him geeky friends like himself; on the other hand, I am thinking that the pressure of a more elite institution might not be good for him. We do have time.</p>
<p>Have any of you with slightly older Aspie kids noticed much improvement between the sophomore and senior years of high school? I’m not talking about girls. I’m talking about social awareness/social comfort/social problem-solving, etc. </p>
<p>He is so brilliant that his mind leaves me in the dust. Yet sometimes he can do things that make me seriously question whether his IQ is in the single digits. It’s those moments that make me despair that he’ll ever be able to go away to school.</p>
<p>One of DD1’s HS friends has Aspergers and he has done very well in a top public engineering/sciences university… Making a near impossible GPA after equally near impossible math placement tests… The school is humongous (35-40k students) but he’s doing very well… He did OK in the general ed requirements and he’s majoring in a fairly challenging math related area… An awesome kid overall.</p>
<p>I love hearing stories like this, turbo93! Thanks! Can you (or anyone on the thread) speak to issues of distance between school and home? The colleges with few core requirements (Grinnell, Hamilton, etc) are a plane ride away for us.</p>
<p>A college student with aspergers here! :)</p>
<p>My school is about 60 miles from home and is a small (about 800 live on campus rest commute) school. Its far enough that it forces me to stay on campus but short enough for my mom to come down if needed (this was tested regularly last spring when i got really sick).</p>
<p>So distance really isn’t an issue and i normally talk to my mom at least once a day.</p>
<p>I have a sister with asperger’s (a little unusual, I know). I have to say, cognitive therapy and anxiety medication did wonders for her. She still struggles, but after a lot of therapy in 9th/10th grade, she made some great friends around 11th/12th. She now goes to a small LAC about 20 minutes away, and still works close to home. She comes home on her lunch break about three days a week. For her, being close to home was essential to staying balanced. However, im sure others are perfectly fine after moving out. </p>
<p>I think her diagnosis (around 12-13) was the best thing for her. She was told, and it helped her understand why she never really fit in. But I would worry about mis-diagnosis and unneeded damage to self-esteem. I know my sister struggled with self-esteem issues after finding out she was an Aspie. She had extensive support through the UC Davis mind institute, including group therapy. If UCSB doesn’t have what you need, you could try calling them as well. </p>
<p>In short, I think you should have your son reevaluated. It seems highly possible that he has Asperger’s, but diagnoses can change over time. I liked DeskPotato’s approach to mentioning it a lot.</p>
<p>The kid I mentioned was accepted (read, red carpet rolled out :)) at the state flagship about 1 1/2 hour away from his mom and also at a further north state flagship about 4 hours away where dad lives. Since he lived with his mom thru HS he chose the 1st one. Lots of kids from the local HS went to the first school, and culture wise it was not very ‘radical’ but academically it is demanding, challenging, top 20 ranked, et. al. and he rose up to the occasion.</p>
<p>I wonder if the key here is to walk right into a challenging program which focuses away from ‘individuals’ and more into ‘let’s ace Multivariate Calculus and Function Theory and worry about everything else later’ along with a healthy dose of ‘35-40k students all focusing on passing Calculus and Physics, no time for students to worry about much else’ :)</p>
<p>Just wanted to comment on one thing OP that jumped out from your post: worry that your DS will not have a good support system if he does not make more friends now. Unless his HS friends are going to college with him, they will not be a support system for him in college. Kids enjoy seeing their HS friends during vacation but most quickly become busy with their new lives.</p>
<p>My DS has many Asperger-like traits, we could have easily obtained a diagnosis and chose not to have that label attached to him. Every parent has to make their choice in this as to what seems best for their child. Middle school was very tough socially but as a freshman in HS he is beginning to thrive socially and academically.</p>
<p>I definitely think you need to open the conversation with your son. Maybe speak to a therapist first. Actually I think maybe make sure the therapist is in on the actual conversation; your son could be quite angry with this type of information being held from him…</p>
<p>My son was officially diagnosed at age 17 in his Jr year of HS. He spent a year in group therapy with other similarly diagnosed teens. It was the best thing ever for him. He was able to own it and move on.</p>
<p>He now is at a state school with wonderful services for learning disabilities (which he also has). He was able to have a double room in a school that tripled freshmen with a letter from his psychiatrist. Which was wonderful; because having added stress of an additional person in a small dorm room might have put him over the edge.</p>
<p>For the first time in his life he has FRIENDS!!! he has people he can hang with or do stuff with…college has been the best experience ever for him.</p>
<p>Not exactly the same, but my 16yo daughter was tested for NVLD, which is on the spectrum, when she was 12. Her diagnosis was ADD and anxiety, but she still demonstrates some autism spectrum traits. I have a cousin with Asperger’s, and a nephew with PDD-NOS and ADHD, so it is in our genes. Anyways…DD’s diagnosis made her feel better because she always knew that she was a different kid, and it explained why her brain worked the way that it does. It offered her relief.</p>
<p>On the subject of TRIO programs. I think that my daughter would technically qualify with her LD diagnosis, but I have found this program at several schools and it sounds hard to get into. Thsi makes me wonder what supports are offered to those students who do not make the cut. Does anyone have any knowledge of this?</p>