<p>I am planning on getting an early start with my open ended essay for 2008 enrollment. For an personal essay prompt, I think I really want to choose an essay of my brother who recently died. What are good pointers or tips an essay about death?</p>
<p>Not an expert here in writing essays but do know what it's like to lose someone (several people) I cared deeply about. First of all, you must have chosen this topic because it is close to your heart and that is a good thing. </p>
<p>Share those feelings honestly.....talk about your brother in a way that the person reading your essay will feel like they knew him. Describe the relationship the two of you had and how his death has impacted you and the rest of your family. I'm sure you realize that your life from here on out will never be the same, and you could share your thoughts on that and what you think your brother would want for you and for your future. When people die they aren't gone forever, just separated from us for awhile and if you also believe that, that can help you through the healing process. Express your thoughts and feelings if you also feel that way. What lessons did your brother teach you while he was alive.....what memories do you hold closest to your heart? I lost my sister-in-law to breast cancer 11 years ago when she was only 46. I can still remember the sound of her voice, her flair for wearing hats, the sound of her laughter, and how her eyes lit up whenever we went to visit her even at the end when she was so ill. She wanted more than anything to see her daughter graduate from high school and to hold her first grandchild. She did not live long enough to do either one but we were there for her daughter at her graduation one year later and we have since held every one of her grandchildren and rocked them to sleep for her. We tell each grandchild about her to keep her memory alive....how will you keep the memory of your dear brother alive? Good Luck with your essay....</p>
<p>My condolences on the loss of your brother. </p>
<p>The most important tip is that college admissions officers will be reading the essay to learn about you and what you have to offer the college. They will not be reading the essay to learn about your brother.</p>
<p>If the essay will tell them lots about you, then submit it. Examples of this could be if as a result of your brother's death, you decided on a certain career goal or became active in certain kind of organizations. For instance, if he died of cancer and in tribute to him, you participated in the Lance Armstrong Challenge, raising thousands of dollars for cancer research, your experience could make an excellent essay topic.</p>
<p>Otherwise, I don't suggest writing the essay for college. However, it may be a good journal entry for you or an entry for an inspirational writing contest.</p>
<p>I agree with Northstarmom that IF the colleges would be more interested in hearing about what you have to offer them as opposed to you writing an essay about the loss of your brother, then I would pick another topic. Your loss is way too personal and life altering for you to pour your heart and soul into not knowing if it will be appreciated and understood. I am sure the college admissions people want to get to know you through your essay but maybe not on this intimate of a level, unless of course you can write it in a way that could be interpreted that your own personal experience with losing your brother would in some way make you an asset to the colleges you are applying to. Good luck.</p>
<p>actually it depends on the prompt, some of them just scream "i was beaten every day with a potato sack by my little sister"</p>
<p>Good Lord help the person that gets the beaten by the potato sack prompt....although I bet there are quite a few out there that could run with that if they have a 'randon' type sense of humor. Seiken.....how would you expound on that?</p>
<p>show, don't tell. describe reactions, not emotions. give them the experience, and if you depict it well, your audience will feel the emotion firsthand. if you want them to see how this has changed you, make your essay like a portal into being you, for the 5 minutes they read it. if you do it right, they'll know who you are.</p>
<p>then they accept you.</p>
<p>I respectfully disagree with those who do not feel that a personal narrative about your brother would be appropriate. I have taught college English for over twenty years, and the essays about losing a parent (siblings are rare -- I mean, in terms of the essays submitted to me) are always particularly moving. I have often wondered why...
And I actually found out the hard way -- my husband passed away last year and ever since, my child writes beautiful essays about his Dad if the prompt matches up. So, he has had a lot of practice with this topic, and what he says is very sincere.<br>
I also think that experiencing a tragic loss during high school gives you the chance to show a college what you can do under these circumstances. If you feel this topic is important and it is in your heart, then write about your brother -- . It is a lifechanging event, and I am sure it affected your whole family.</p>
<p>Here are some comments from experts that I found about the kind of topic that the OP is considering. </p>
<p>"Top 5 College Essay Topics to Avoid</p>
<p>1) Essays About Death
Sometimes it seems natural to write about a person's death and what that person meant to you, especially when it's a close family member. While writing about that experience may be therapeutic and useful, it's usually not a great idea for a college essay topic. The essay is a good opportunity to write about positive aspects of yourself, and essays about death tend to focus on another person. It's also frequently difficult for applicants' personalities to shine through such a somber topic."<a href="http://collegeapps.about.com/mbiopage.htm">http://collegeapps.about.com/mbiopage.htm</a></p>
<p>"Admissions officers agree that whatever the topic, everything rests in the execution. They look for a thoughtful, revelatory essay that enhances the rest of a student's application. Some applicants reveal too much, however. "I've read accounts of lost virginity, kleptomania, bulimia," says Lloyd Peterson, a former gatekeeper at Yale University who is now vice president at College Coach in Newton, Massachusetts. "But the topics that really illuminated an applicant's personality were the ones that dealt with setbacks--a divorce or a death--and showed resilience or depth. 'What I Did on My Summer Vacation' didn't help an application in most cases," [Lloyd] Peterson [a former Yale admissions officer] warns."
<a href="http://www.findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_m1175/is_3_37/ai_n6097596%5B/url%5D">http://www.findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_m1175/is_3_37/ai_n6097596</a></p>
<p>From U of Virginia's office of admissions:</p>
<p>"Too often, however students who want to avoid sounding generic with respect to form or content choose exactly the wrong remedy; they think that bigger topics - or bigger words - are better. But it is almost impossible, in 500 words, to write well about vast topics such as the death of a loved one (see excerpt: "the bad"). I am not advocating longer essays (just remember how many applications admissions officers need to read); I am advocating essays with a sharp focus that allows for detail. Detail is what differentiates one essay from another, one applicant from another....</p>
<p>"The student whose essay appears below, an example of "the good," has undertaken the task of describing - that is, of showing, in detail - the deterioration of her father as he gets treated for cancer. I do not know of a single member of our staff who was not deeply affected by this essay, the whole of which is as well done as the excerpt. What is impressive about the essay is the willingness of the writer to carefully notice everything that is happening. She opens with a sound, that coughing, and then creates a visual scene that we can see clearly. I said before that writing about death and sickness is perhaps one of the most difficult topics to tackle in a college essay, but here we have an example of why this topic can demonstrate not only writing ability but the courage to face a terrible situation head-on with intellect and power. Compare this with the other essay about death. There, even though the writer was saturated with emotions, he was merely telling us, in abstract terms, what he felt."</p>
<p>Excerpts from the U of Virginia's essays.
"The bad: From an early age, we accept death as the inevitable, but do not comprehend its actual denotation. Death is the impending future that all people must eventually grasp. In my early teens, my grandfather tragically perished. As a youth who did not identify with such a cataclysm I was saturated with various emotions. Initially, I was grieved by the loss of a loved one and could not understand why this calamity had to befall upon my family. I always considered death to have a devastating effect, but was shocked by the emotional strain it places upon an individual.</p>
<p>--The good: The coughing came first, the hacking in the middle of the night. Then there were the multiple doctor visits, each one the same: the little white rooms with magazines where I tried not to stare at the bald, gaunt woman across from me. One of the white coats finally said something, steadily, forecasting an 80 percent change of rain. The list of second opinions grew too long to count, looking for someone to say the right thing. Finally, there was relief in hearing the name of a kinder killer: lymphoma...."</p>
<p>I read that article too, but especially since the OP is getting an early start, after a few drafts it should be clear whether such an essay will work or not.</p>
<p>However, I suggest tackling a couple of other essays first, and maybe avoiding this issue after all. You don't really want to be wallowing in your brother's death for the next few months, and you don't want college application time (which can feel pretty stressful already) to be inextricably connected with thinking about your brother. If you mention his death in an essay that's more focused on you, that could be more appropriate and easier to handle.</p>
<p>If you really want to, though, and it feels right, go for it.</p>
<p>"But the topics that really illuminated an applicant's personality were the ones that dealt with setbacks--a divorce or a death--and showed resilience or depth."</p>
<p>I think this statement illustrates why an essay about the death of someone close can be a good basis for an essay -- despite opinions to the contrary!<br>
Because, of course, the person died; the essay becomes about you and how you dealt with this adversity and how it influenced you. Certainly, it must have changed your role in the family, for example.</p>
<p>Again, I have read essays of every topic under the sun, written as responses to prompts very similar to the ones given by most colleges, and a heartfelt essay about how you coped with a tragic loss is probably much more interesting than an essay about winning a speech and debate tournament or about seeing poverty for the first time on your Jamaica vacation.</p>
<p>Just my two cents.</p>