<p>hi dear parents,
so this is gonna be another stupid girl cant make up her mind if she should join a sorority or not. i like the idea of "making life-long friendship" and "build up network", but i do not very into parties. i transfered from another college last year and in this new school, i actually made some new friends. but i always feel like its different from what i expected (school life wise) then i think about sororities.
so like i said im a junior already, and i work on the weekend so my schedule is kinda fixed. when i search sororities on the internet, i saw either extreme good comment or extreme bad comment. the only sorority girl i know in life said her sorority sister are only her "party friends".... i think some of you may have the experience with sororities, so i would like to hear some advice from you.. especially when im a junior now, is it realistic??</p>
<p>As a junior - and I assume a 2nd semester junior - it’s kind of late to be joining a sorority. Not impossible, but late.</p>
<p>Sororities vary greatly between different sororities on one campus, and between colleges. Some are big party groups, others are not. Your best way to find out about the sororities on your campus would be to ask girls who are in them.</p>
<p>Sororities usually have a formal recruitment period. You have to go through the process to join them during a set period of time. If you search for Greek Life on your college’s website it will probably give you dates for recruitment. Recruitment is a mutual selection - you have to like them, and they have to want you. </p>
<p>If you are happy at your college, busy and have a good group of friends, then perhaps you don’t need to join a sorority. College is full of opportunities and no one can take advantage of all of them. But if you think it’s something you might enjoy, and you might want the networking opportunities it gives you after college, then start asking questions of current sorority girls.</p>
<p>I’m not in a sorority nor are my daughters, but one kid is a member of a “professional fraternity” and there are significant time constraints in terms of attendance at events. If your schedule doesn’t have much flexibility, you might want to seriously consider if you have the time to handle the commitments. If you do, there might be some social advantages, but it’s your call.</p>
<p>You need to find out about how recruitment works at your particular school. However, at most chapters there is a strong institutional bias against recruiting juniors or seniors, since the idea is to spend plenty of time together forming a sisterhood. Back when I was in college I tried mightily to get a junior friend – a cheerleader no less from a D1 school who really was a nice girl – into my sororiety but couldn’t manage it because she was already a junior and there is limited room in the pledge class. If your school is like this at all, don’t put yourself through the pain. Besides, I know plenty of people who had as good or better time in college without it, and frankly, from what you say about yourself, this doesn’t really seem like your “thing.” Find what YOU love and dive in, it is NEVER too late for that. Glee. Community Service. School paper. Get a job on campus. Whatever it is that sounds appealing to you.</p>
<p>thanks for you all for the fast replying and honest suggestions!! my school is not a competitive greek school and also im doing a 5 year program thing so my expected graduation date is most likely in 2014… (first junior semester now)
the most thing that makes me so conflicting is that im actually going through spring informal recruitment now, and after went to 4 events from 3 different chapters, i still dont know if i should join or not… i mean i like those girls they are very positive and full of passion and we had good conversations… everytime i went to their events or saw their pics online, i feel like thats exactly what i want!! BUT sometimes for i-dont-know-waht reason, i also keep questioning myself if this is too crazy? (maybe bc im asian?lol and join in junior year…all these might “deeply shock” my other friends, parents or even myself)
im not sure if im gonna get bid this time tho 1), most of them give bid to their friends 2), spring PC is very small (like 4-7 ppl i think) and i feel its too competitive to compete with 20+ other girls, especially maybe 16 of them are “friends”.
i cant tell what i want to do now…sigh…</p>
<p>I would suggest if you have some friends in the sorority then join, if not then I would not, unless you think there might be some networking possibilities in the future. The only other exception to this is to actually meet all of the girls and talk to them, or attend some events and watch for those girls who are there, but you can tell that they are not a part of the group. Sororities need alot of members to make it less expensive for everyone involved, so they may accept people who they would accept into the sorority but that doesnt mean they are going to treat you like a sister or family member or part of the group. My daughter is experiencing this now. Everything was great during recruitment, but has went downhill from there. So take your time, do your research before you invest your time and money and heart into something that may be dissapointing. Good luck to you:)</p>
<p>Wait til you have a bid then decide. At the moment, you are kinda stressing about a decision that you don’t have to make yet. </p>
<p>I would always advise that if you are unsure and if you are in a position that makes you uncompetitive v freshman PNMs (e.g. at large Greek school or a junior/senior, etc) then you should accept your bid and go through the new member period. Recruitment, even informal recruitment, is not sorority membership, and you will learn more once you’ve joined. You can drop out (make sure you know of any financial commitments) at any time before initiation if you feel it’s not for you…</p>
<p>As for the experience itself, it depends on the girls in each chapter as to what they do and how close they are, especially for smaller chapters. Some will be more about partying or community service and others less so. Some chapters are really close, others not so much. Don’t listen to gossip or rumor, especially on the internet, about the chapters at your school. You need to make up your own mind.</p>
<p>Please also make sure you ask about the time commitment for the new member period (which would be this semester) as this will be the most time consuming. Can you make it work in your schedule with your job and studies? </p>
<p>Until then, relax, keep an open mind and enjoy getting to meet people at the rush parties</p>
<p>Much good advice above. Don’t waste time stressing about this. Read the above posts carefully and follow the advice. Most (ie many, many more than half) students never join a sorority or fraternity and do make lifelong friends et al. Join if you can afford the time and money required and will enjoy the activites. It certainly isn’t necessary to be in one to have the optimal/best college experience.</p>