<p>I would suggest to the OP that the D make the college list (AND her senior year schedule, but I digress). If your D wants to apply to only MIT, Princeton and OSU, and you feel uncomfortable with that, tell her she needs to have X number of schools she will apply to. Specify she needs B number of reaches, C number of matches, and D number of safeties. Your D is obviously a smart girl - she can manage her college research just fine. Discuss with her when she wants to. When she's completed her list, go over it with her to make sure they are true matches and safeties (often a particular program or major within a college is more competitive than the rest, so be aware of that). Be sure she gets financial aid information (including need and merit based). Make sure there is at least one financial safety on the list.</p>
<p>This is not something you need to do for her. You do not need to tell her you think she should consider certain schools at this point, especially as it seems you have taken over the college search, the course planning, the major, etc... This is something she needs to do (mostly) herself. Be supportive but not overly involved. It sometimes takes heroic restraint (for all of us), but it's necessary to step out of the picture a bit.</p>