No, the WORST thing that can happen ISN'T that I won't get accepted.../rant

Pre-College Topics High School Life
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<p>This is more like a blog or something, but hear me out, please? I'm really stressed and part of it has turned into frustration.</p>

<p>Thanks.</p>

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<p>Ever hear of the statement, "Relax...the worst thing that can happen is that you won't get in?" Yeah, I'm sure everyone's heard that, because to the other person your hopes and dreams of entering a college you want to get in isn't all that big. To them, college will be a small part of your life later on. Yeah, I'm sure that's true, but to that SAME person, THEIR hopes and dreams of a college is something big, something that THEIR own advice can't apply to. Well, the truth is, that unequal interaction produces such unfitting and falsely optimistic "advice" as, "The worst thing that can happen is you won't get in."</p>

<p>Well, let me tell you-</p>

<p>No, the WORST thing that can happen ISN'T that I won't get in the college I want to. It means that I won't experience the education from an institute I look forward to. It means that I can’t joyfully do research at that place because it turns out one of the things that interested me is its capable and world-class research facility. It means I won’t be able to take Biology or Chemistry, or East Asians studies in a classroom at a university that I got into. It means that the environment of the university I made my goal won't be present if I go into another school when rejected from my top choice. It means that I won’t be able to walk through campus grounds, feel the fresh air and the sun, and say “hello” to acquaintances and friends. It means that the potential to MEET and BEFRIEND people at my top school will be lost. It means I won’t be able to stay up late night with your roommate playing video games on a Friday night realizing that class is cancelled tomorrow. It means that having late night bashes and fun with friends won’t be an opportunity to me at the college I want to get into. It means that I won’t enjoy the weather at the place I want to go to. It means I won’t be able to feel a HUGE sense of accomplishment. It means that the videotape that my parents recorded of me getting into my top choice WON’T be made because I got rejected. It means that I won't be participating in patriotic school events, days, and functions, and having fun on those days, or on the contrast, sitting with friends and enjoying a latte in the library studying for my big Orgo exam all night. It means that I won’t see the happy faces of my family and friends because I got what I wanted for 4+ years. It means that I can’t look back and know that my efforts were well-worth it. It also means that I can’t feel a sense of accomplishment because one of my largest and long-term goals was reached. It means that I can’t run to my professor or TA and ask them for help because I don’t understand a Physics concept...it means that I can’t get stressed (yes, REALLY) about having a hell week and three papers due with two major finals. And it means that I can’t reach my ultimate happiness in terms of college education and choice...it means that I’m not competent enough. It means that I’ll be upset for a time because that's what happens. It definitely means a lot of things..it means that I can’t feel grateful or happy for reading the acceptance letter to the institution I have been desiring to attend. It means I can’t form study groups that so happen to turn into hangouts because all that a study group is what the opposite is. It means that I can’t find a book that my local library or school library or the Borders near my house didn’t have. It means that I WON’T be sleeping at night thanking whoever is out there- a Higher Being or whoever else, for letting me get admitted to this university. *It means that my life will be different. *</p>

<p>It also means that ALL this I mentioned above WILL happen; just not at the college of my choice. No, that IS a major thing…knowing that you can do ALL this at the college you always wanted to get into than the one that wasn’t your first pick.</p>

<p>Yeah, I know that some people find that the other college they got into and attended turned out much better than their top choice (which rejected them). Yeah, I know that things like 'rejection' happen and that colleges can't accept everyone. Yeah, I know that not all hopes and dreams can be fulfilled. Yeah, I know you think that 10 years down the line I will laugh at myself being so crazy over entering the university of my choice. Yeah...</p>

<p>Well, I don't feel that any of that applies to me. I know for a fact that if I get rejected from my top choice and attend another university, I'll be upset because the worst thing to happen ISN'T that I got rejected, but that I lost the chance to explore the college campus, join clubs and fraternities, run to the cafeteria for a quick grab at a sandwich with friends and run to class, to meet new people, to make MEMORIES at the university that I attended, to walk around the lakes and gorges and to view the scenery, to maybe go wander off into the natural environment around the campus, sit down alone on a patch of dead leaves, and meditate on my life, to actually ENJOY the thought and feeling that goes along the line of, "YES! My efforts paid off because I got into the college I wanted too! I've worked so hard for it and I got in!"</p>

<p>Yeah, but sometimes that doesn't happen. Because in life, you don't always get what you want. Sadly, I didn't think like that as I worked hard in high school to fulfill the expectations of the university I want to attend.</p>

<p>Before I continue, the following is a lesson and a reminder to all of you out there that got into the college of your choice- be grateful. Seriously. The little things that I mentioned above may sound like VERY minor things to you, but to a student who has yet to experience college, that sounds like a lot.</p>

<p>Now back to my /rant. As I surf around here, I see the "chance me" threads and see scores and EC's that are much better than mine, and there can be nothing more discouraging. It's not anyone's fault but mine because I didn't mentally prepare earlier for getting a rejection letter, or didn't work hard enough..which is probably it.</p>

<p>My friend recently got accepted into PennState, and I saw the acceptance letter. I always wondered how they looked like, and yeah, I wished I got one from my top college after I apply.</p>

<p>As time for applications appears, and junior year ends, I'm beginning to realize and become more pessimistic about my chances to enter my top choice. I wish I could go back to ninth grade and work harder than before. No, I'm not those panicky Asians (well I am Asian) to think that despite my scores being great, I think they are still bad. Hands down, my transcript ISN'T bad, it's okay-decent (but this is MY perspective), but what can I say...people out there just have better chances than me. Oh yeah, and I have to take my SAT's and AP exams...as if I won't work hard enough for those either...</p>

<p>No, I’m not being over-dramatic, it’s just my frustration TRYING to be formed in words.</p>

<p>So yeah, the worst thing to happen ISN'T that I won't get accepted...the worst that can happen is that I MISS OUT on everything that comes with that damned acceptance letter.</p>

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<p>Comfort will be appreciated, but reading this is a way of helping out on its own. Please be kind and understanding, thanks.</p>

<p>And thanks for reading...</p>

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<p>Wow, you really brought your username to your post…</p>

<p>That said, your’e not the only one who feels that way. Out of curriousity what schools are you considering? If it’s HYPS/Ivy Leagues then I REALLY wouldn’t become attached or sad because of those schools. YES they are good schools and YES they will give you a great experience, but there is no 100% for ANYONE even the brillaint double legacy with 2350 and 4.5 GPA Valedvictorian. Admissions these days are so unpredictable. I my self am not steller stats star and I am surpassed by many in these forums (think of the world! Think of the geniuses who don’t spend time on CC!). I think of myself as a underdog in the admissions process. FIND schools which won’t be reaches for you that will give you that good feel. That is the worst mistake anyone could make, but their eggs all in one basket aka HYPS etc. </p>

<p>When April comes around, yes I will be a bit dissapointed that I will get rejected by my top dream schools, but I will get over it. Why? Because I’ve chosen schools that I am far more likley to get into that I actually do like. Rather then getting upset about it now, use your remainder of the junior year to 1) do something extrodinary 2) FIND NEW SCHOOLS THAT WORK FOR YOU. </p>

<p>You will face this problem again in Grad school and jobs, so this ISNT the end of the world really. It is better to be pleasently surprised then bitterly dissapointed.</p>

<p>best of luck</p>

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<p>Um, I…Er, um um </p>

<p>Don’t know what to say to that.</p>

<p>All I know is that you CAN NOT make yourself miserable if you don’t get into your “dream school.” Of course you’ll be upset but that shouldn’t last into your freshman year in college. If you’re thinking “Oh I should be at Harvard (or where ever) but I’m not because I wasn’t accepted,” then you WILL be miserable. </p>

<p>Fall in love with a college you know you’ll get into.</p>

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<p>Hold on here, that’s WAY easier said than done. Also as an international, the attitude here is “HYP, or back to your home country”.</p>

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<p>It is pretty sad that you are letting some school decide your future. I know that I WILL achieve my goals whether I go to Harvard or UF.</p>

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<p>I hate to tell you that your life is not over if you don’t get into a HYPS. And here is even a bigger shocker, your life might even be better at a different school. You might have a better time, meet the love of your life, and completely love a school that is not the best school ever.</p>

<p>I go to a doctor here that did not go to a top tier school. He went to a good school and then went to a better medical school. This doctor is now nationally regarded as one of the best neurologist in the country. He was the head resident, etc. I go into his office and he has pictures of him and famous actors/actresses with their autograph. He has an amazing life (I talk to him a lot) and makes I bet well over 1.5 million per year. Just because you don’t go to the best school does not mean your life will be bad. Please, stop thinking that!!!</p>

<p>I want to become a doctor. I will become that doctor if I go to Harvard or Penn State.</p>

<p>Additionally, I have a high GPA and high SAT scores and have been told to apply to HYPS, etc. Yet, I am in love with Rochester. I would rather go to Rochester than Harvard.</p>

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<p>For the juniors and sophs who are starting to think about where they might like to apply to college…this is why one selects a list of schools, <em>any</em> of which you’d would be happy to attend. It’s all about doing one’s homework, researching (and visiting, if time/finances permit), talking to other students, profs, advisors, etc.</p>

<p>At our house, DS created a list of schools, any one of which he could see himself turning down the other. It reduced the stress immensely. (And, I’ll add, made his essays stronger, as he knew why he wanted to attend each school and could give specific experiences/conversations/reasons.) His ego’s not riding on who deigns to accept him, as he knows there are things for him at each school. LOVE YOUR LIST.</p>

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<p>the way i see it, your expectations are setting you up for unhappiness either way. if you get into your dream school, you have SUCH high expectations that there’s no way they can all be met. if you go to another school, you will be constantly comparing your experience with what “could” have been, no matter how wonderful. it’s out of your hands now. see what happens, and don’t look back once you’re there.</p>

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<p>You’re acting as if you believe that if you don’t get an education at your top-choice school, you won’t get one at all. Your second-choice will likely not be horrible. It’s true your life would be different, but would it be worse?</p>

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<p>Wow…you seriously need to relax. </p>

<p>I have a 3.7 UW GPA, a 28 ACT composite and a ton of great ECs. Know where I’m attending next fall? Sonoma STATE. That’s right. State. Not some UC or Ivy League. And you know what? I couldn’t be more excited.</p>

<p>Have you even LOOKED at schools that are safeties/matches/slight reaches? Or are you so obsessed with schools that are out of your reach that you don’t even care?</p>

<p>Your whole “my life is over if I don’t go to my top choice” philosophy is BS. You’ll have a great experience, wherever you go, if you have the right attitude.</p>

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<p>Please hear me out! </p>

<p>I agree with most of what you’re saying-your life will be different depending on what college you get into. That’s natural-even what decision you make for lunch “changes” your life, so of course it would change that. </p>

<p>I’m just asking, What will happen if you are accepted…and it wasn’t what you thought it would be? I speak, sadly, from personal experience. I’m going to my “dream” highschool (junior too) I so wanted to be at in 8th grade, I just knew that its 15 AP classes, wonderful teachers who were experts in their fields, crazy good sports and clubs, and brilliant students would mesh. I’d do all those highschool experiences of going to sweet sixteens every week, picking out prom dresses, etc (just as you mentioned the things you are looking forward to in college). The sad truth? It was fake. About half of the girls cheated to get into my hs, and most of the rest (really 100/230 left) left to go to their public school. The teachers I liked all left to be replaced by monsters-who wouldn’t moderate a club more than a n hour a month. I’ve gone to one sweet sixteen where I hardly clicked with any of the people in my grade (only with a public school girl, incidentally), and I doubt I’m going to my prom…because I hate my school! </p>

<p>I know you don’t really care what a random person online says, but I hope you’ll listen. My expectations were SO high, that even a moderate school (not even a bad school like it turned out to be) would have seemed miserable. So, don’t expect any college to be everything. There is good news-if you hate a college (or…get rejected) you can always transfer. My mom went to a horrible school, but ended up transferring to the Ivy League, meeting my dad, and having the time of her life.</p>

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<p>calm down.</p>

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Sorry to be frank (probably sounding like a moron in the process), but how’s that different from real life? I know getting into college is different from, say, not getting that pony you always wanted, but you can’t really mourn the loss of what you’ve never had.</p>

<p>Best of luck wherever you do end up. It would be a shame to harbor sad feelings towards a college because of its name.</p>

<p>Alex</p>

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<p>This whole thing is out of my brain. I for the hell of me don’t even know what I’ll do tomorrow, not to mention what college I’ll go to. Common, life is not discrete it’s analogue!</p>

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<p>Negativity – I know what you mean. A lot of us have our hearts set on that “dream school.” While it seems that you won’t be happy anywhere else, realistically you will. And I think you know that. Allow yourself to freak out for a bit; ranting was hopefully a BIG help. </p>

<p>But then realize that you will have experiences where ever you go. They may not be the experiences that you would have had at your top-choice school, but they will be experiences nonetheless. If you get rejected, THAT is an experience. Things happen for a reason and while you may not get that top-tier education, you WILL get an education. And in the end, isn’t an education – albeit not the one you originally longed for – better than none at all? </p>

<p>Keep hoping, you never know what will happen. Good luck!</p>

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<p>Hmmm… </p>

<p>Did you know there are 3856 colleges and universities registered with College Board? I understand that you have great feelings for your top choice school, but really, out of so many options, is it even possible that there is only one opportunity? Do you really think so little of yourself that you will only feel validated if you are accepted by one school out of almost 4000? You will not ‘MISS OUT’ on everything at one college because there is very little that can only be found at one college. For the record, the experiences you outlined in your rant can be found at many universities across the country and worldwide. </p>

<p>Yes, it hurts to get rejected. Yes, a distressing reality can be hard to accept. But the fact of the matter is, if you are as gifted as you believe yourself to be, you will be able to have an excellent experience wherever you go. Contrary to what some people seem to think around these boards, finding a college is not like finding a spouse. It is just fine to fall in love with more than one. And for God’s sake, just learn to love whichever school you do wind up at. You will be a happier human being for it. </p>

<p>I think this quote is something a lot of us could stand to read:</p>

<p>“There’s nowhere you can be that isn’t where you’re meant to be. It’s easy! All you need is love.” John Lennon</p>

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<p>I love that quote, kcarls!</p>

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<p>kcarls, I agree, that is a wonderful quote and I think Negativity really needs to read it and reevaluate his/her outlook. Because with that attitude, HYP and the rest of life will be just as miserable as any other school.</p>

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<p>Have you forgotten that there are more qualified or nearly-qualified students than spots at whatever university you have set your heart on attending? Every Ivy League school is turning away qualified students. They all freely admit that most applicants can do the work successfully at their college.</p>

<p>Which means those equally qualified students will be going somewhere else–for you to meet and have those wonderful times with.</p>

<p>Ditto for the professors. The world is full of interesting, talented and brilliant people outside the doors of Ivy League universities. Band together with them at whatever university you (and they) wind up at.</p>

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<p>If you constantly compare your school to another, you’ll feel horrible about your experience there. YOU make whether or not you enjoy that experience. There isn’t much of a gap between reach schools and matches for most people, and the only way you will notice the difference is if you constantly compare the two.</p>