<p>As I was writing my "Why Wellesley" essay, I was overcome with a huge feeling of dread that has yet to dissipate. What if I wasn't good enough for Wellesley?<br>
I'm really afraid that, upon showing up for college, I become the straggler and fail at everything. I have never had good study habits because I was always left on my own to figure things out (my parents were always involved in their own drama). I mediated my parents through the 7 years that their divorce dragged on. School became a lesser priority for me as I was always dealing with family issues. I still got straight A's while taking the toughest classes possible...until junior year came around. I had a terrible time balancing everything and suddenly I had to work really hard to understand the curriculum and get good grades. Around that time, my father was getting even more abusive and I started cracking under the pressure of working(my father has been unemployed for 4 years), school, tennis, family issues, school drama...and this has persisted to now, in my senior year.
I really wonder if I'm suited for such an elite school. Your opinions?</p>
<p>I doubt any of us can give you the validation you seek, but I feel a great deal of sympathy for your situation because of my own experiences with similar issues. I want to tell you that these experiences test you and it will get better.</p>
<p>It's a bit scary for people used to depending only on themselves to think of the possibility that they might fail themselves and not be enough, if that makes any sense. One of the things I've come to love about Wellesley is that you're really not alone in things. They throw you advisers, resources, community which, although initially overwhelming, is comforting.</p>
<p>I was also concerned about whether I would be able to survive, but it was surprising how much discipline and time management I could summon considering my normal habits (and it's still something to be worked out). Academically, it was a bit of a struggle/adjustment in some aspects, but being free of the environment you describe makes many other things much easier. I would say be realistically wary, but not pessimistic because there are a lot of opportunities to do things differently.</p>
<p>I agree with Femme. It's hard for us to know if you're "suited" for any sort of school. You really just have to judge that on how you feel and how you see yourself performing in the next four years.</p>
<p>The good news is there's a lot of amazing non-"elite" schools out there. Some people thrive a lot more at those type of schools, and they certainly provide a great education, including a lot of Women's Colleges that seem a lot like Wellesley. If it turns out you're better suited for one of these, you might have an even better four years.</p>
<p>Is there anyone you can talk to, maybe at your school, about your anxieties about college? It seems like you've gone through a lot and need to figure some things out, so maybe there's someone who could help you with that.</p>
<p>Also, don't think college makes you "amazing". Plenty of amazing people go to non-elite colleges or no college at all, while the "elite" schools are filled with non-amazing people.</p>
<p>Good luck!</p>
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I'm really afraid that, upon showing up for college, I become the straggler and fail at everything.
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<p>If it's any consolation, I think that a lot of Wellesley students start their college careers with the same worries. Whether or not you will gain admission to the school is anybody's guess, but don't worry about being "good enough." You have enough on your plate without questioning your self-worth on top of it.</p>
<p>Best wishes, and hang in there.</p>
<p>I think a lot of students at EVERY college feel the way you do. Parental issues, their own insecurities, fears... all of these contribute to what may well be the most stress-filled year of your life, Jan of senior year to Jan of freshman year. </p>
<p>Just remember to keep yourself on an even keel, don't cave into the pressures of drugs, drinking or sex, which can seem like a great way out, but just lead to more problems.</p>
<p>Do you have an adult you can trust with whom you can talk? That might help you a lot.</p>
<p>I can honestly say that bad study habits don't disqualify you from the competition at an elite school. I had terrible (like, didn't turn in final projects/papers terrible) study habits in high school, and to an extent I still struggle today, but I'm doing quite well at Wellesley. Everything changes in college--you don't have to deal with your family the way you do in high school, you get to study what you want and you're much closer to both your studies and the people around you. There's a lot of pressure at Wellesley, but it's applied in very different places--you'll study fewer subjects, you'll play fewer sports, but in a way that focus makes the stress you do have that much easier to deal with.</p>
<p>It sounds like college might be a lot less stressful for you than high school. Really, have you ever just had YOURSELF to worry about, and no one else? You might find studying a lot easier away from home, and your study habits are probably nowhere near as bad as you think they are. After all, you DID manage to do well in high school in spite of everything else that was going on in your life. Good luck, and try to enjoy the new experiences you'll have.</p>
<p>I actually think you sound incredibly amazing. It takes fortitude to be able to accept and talk about your situation such as you have. I went to an alternative high school, where I began under very difficult "life circumstances". I wrote my essays from the standpoint of overcoming obstacles.
CC is populated with kids who've breezed through high school, their ECs, etc. While a school like Harvard might be less interested in an untraditional story of difficulty and success, I like to think that these elite LACs will recognize kids like us for the value our life experiences adds to our applications.</p>
<p>I want to sincerely thank you all for the kind responses. It's assuring to hear that I'm not perpetually doomed for distress and failure. </p>
<p>I never imagined I had so much "me" work to do, but I'm working on it! Sometimes I feel like I've made lots of progress and then other times I feel like I've recessed to square one. It's a harrowing yet exciting ride I have on the roller coaster of life! </p>
<p>Again, thank you all for giving me a little boost. You all got me back on track. ;)</p>